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Topic: The Loves of Our Lives  (Read 9189 times)

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Re: The Loves of Our Lives
« Reply #15 on: April 25, 2004, 05:14:49 PM »
My lady constantly needs reassurance about her looks et al. She won my heart over the internet and I fell for her before I had even seen her. Looks are superficial, it's what makes the person that counts.
She looks pretty good to me. And yes, most of us men prefer our women to LOOK like women and not racing snakes....  ;D

PS This ain't the georgia gal, it's her hubby speaking.
« Last Edit: April 25, 2004, 05:16:52 PM by georgia »
MOMMA ALWAYS SAID:  "There an awful lot you can tell 'bout a person by their shoes" --- "Where they goin' , Where they been"
"I've worn lots of shoes"   Forrest Gump

"I don't know if we each have a destiny, or if we're all just floatin' around accidental-like on a breeze. But I, I think maybe it's both."     Forrest Gump
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"An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile, hoping it will eat him last."   Winston Churchill


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Re: The Loves of Our Lives
« Reply #16 on: March 11, 2006, 09:06:41 PM »
wow,

im completely speechless how almost every aspect of these forums seem to touch on the one part of your life that you worry about the most. I too have had an extreme weight issue since my last daughter was born via c-section. My ex husband constantly told me i was not thin like i used to be and hence the reason he and i argued like mad. In comes the love of my life, a lovely british man whom i adore with all my heart and soul and for some reason despite the daily mutual "god i love you"'s and such and you are so beautiful and i love you just the way you are, if you want to lose weight do it because you want to not because i want you too, cause i loved you before i seen the physical you and i love you more now that were happily married. I am convinced that all the british men are angels in desguise or at least the one i married and the ones that i have heard from on this forum. I will be moving to the Uk in June and am still struggling with my weight (200 pounds) wow i can type it now =x but i love him so much for just loveing me that i am truly trying to accept the real me.. the cuddly me...



bex


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Re: The Loves of Our Lives
« Reply #17 on: March 11, 2006, 09:12:22 PM »
Bex you aren't alone..I am overweight and my DH loves me the way I am..and he is a average man....he always said he didn't care how big I was along as I was healthy with it.....but I want to be thinner cause I want to be healthy.....and be able to wear nicer clothes......




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Re: The Loves of Our Lives
« Reply #18 on: March 11, 2006, 09:56:11 PM »
yes meShell i do quite agree, its hard to find the cute little clothes in size 22 and make them look like a million bux...hence my love for lots of shoes lol  ... i simply adore all of you , you simply make life so much more bearable in this overly weight conscious world we live in... *hugs* to all of us big cuddly ladies <33333 and the brits who love us


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Re: The Loves of Our Lives
« Reply #19 on: March 12, 2006, 10:47:19 AM »
Bex, my ex-husband wouldn't even touch me if I wasn't overly-thin - he turned me into an anorexic.  Well, I shouldn't blame him completely; after all, I did have a choice.  I chose to try to kill myself by becoming dangeruosly thin.  The thing is, his constant beratement about my inadequacies (or, what he selfishly perceived as inadequacies) did a lot of damage to me emotionally.  Now that I have a man who adores me and truly believes that I am beautiful, even though it is obvious he feels this way, I still battle insecurity - which is sad, because Jamie always desires me no matter how my weight may fluctuate.  I should really get over it now, it's been long enough holding onto this baggage, but it's not easy to get rid of it even when situations totally change. 

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Re: The Loves of Our Lives
« Reply #20 on: March 12, 2006, 11:01:25 AM »
After years of dealing with American men, who all told me I was too fat, too old, too flat-chested, "thought too much", etc., I pretty much gave up on relationships, until I met my Swedish husband when I was 49 years old and he was 53.  Didn't have a clue what he looked like (internet friendship at first), didn't even care, because he was SO smart and funny.  When things started to become more interesting, I told him straight out, "I'm 49 years old, I'm overweight, I have grey in my hair and I've been told I'm scary smart."  His reply?  "I am not interested in anorexic bimbos young enough to be my daughter."  I think I fell in love right about then.  Funny thing?  He hadn't ever scanned a photo and I hadn't a clue what he looked like.  He turned out to be a drop-dead gorgeous Viking type, tall, slender, and the day I decided to get rid of my business and move to Sweden with this man was when we had finally met, we were out camping in the States, I'd gotten sunburned the day before, it was 6 a.m., my hair was a mess and he looked at me and said, "You are so beautiful."
If you don't know where you're going, it doesn't matter what road you take.


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Re: The Loves of Our Lives
« Reply #21 on: March 12, 2006, 03:04:16 PM »
idaho, and all you other fantatstic women on this board you are my inspiration, hearing you has renewed my faith and will hopefully allow me to baske in my wonderful husbands love and come over to England in a few months with a new sense of reawakening. thank you all, your like sisters and brothers on this forum an extended family.. im proud and honored to be part of this site.


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Re: The Loves of Our Lives
« Reply #22 on: March 12, 2006, 03:15:24 PM »
When I find myself wondering why/how Guy fell in love with me, I stop and remember that he's often said the exact same thing, wondering why/how I fell in love with him. We all have our insecurites, and they're definitely not gender-specific. :)
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Re: The Loves of Our Lives
« Reply #23 on: March 12, 2006, 03:18:18 PM »
By the way, problems with clothes?  Hate the fuggly clothes for us "larger" folks?  Learn to sew, buy some fabric, create your own style.  I do.  Of course being 55 and not giving a flying F what other folks think doesn't hurt either, but I adore clothes and hate current styles (or lack thereof) anyway.
If you don't know where you're going, it doesn't matter what road you take.


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Re: The Loves of Our Lives
« Reply #24 on: March 12, 2006, 03:58:21 PM »
again i reiterate, you all are AWESOME! thanks for being there


Re: The Loves of Our Lives
« Reply #25 on: March 12, 2006, 05:05:41 PM »
i'm not overweight, but i have had two children, am in my mid-30s and don't look the way i did at 25 anymore - wouldn't want to, either.

i have to say i went off american men ages ago, however, in large part b/c for some reason the vast majority that i met were interested in what i call the 'stick with t*ts' look.  then there was the blond thing . . ., but that's another story.


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Re: The Loves of Our Lives
« Reply #26 on: March 12, 2006, 06:16:19 PM »
i'm not overweight, but i have had two children, am in my mid-30s and don't look the way i did at 25 anymore - wouldn't want to, either.

i have to say i went off american men ages ago, however, in large part b/c for some reason the vast majority that i met were interested in what i call the 'stick with t*ts' look.  then there was the blond thing . . ., but that's another story.

Like you, I'm not overweight now either and at 39 and two kids, things most certainly aren't what they used to be.  Until recently, I've always carried extra weight, especially after my second was born.

It's very easy to get insecure about our bodies.  TV, magazines, etc. are plastered with youthful women and great figures.  But, those images are not realistic or healthy for most real women. 

True beauty comes from within, no matter what shape or size.   Smart men know this.   ;)  (and it works the other way around too...)
« Last Edit: March 12, 2006, 06:24:05 PM by Kellie8yearsinUK »
"Happiness grows at our own firesides, and is not to be picked in strangers' gardens." -
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Re: The Loves of Our Lives
« Reply #27 on: March 14, 2006, 06:47:53 AM »
my DH comes from a big family with 5 sisters, three of whom had (have) eating disorders and the rest of the family is extremely critical of anyone who is bigger than a size 7.  Of course all 8 kids and parents have incredibly fast metabolisms so they tend to be naturally skinny. 

I am not that way.  I naturally gain weight when I'm stressed - without eating!  I am not a size 7 (size 12).  After my second baby, I put on a lot of weight, lost it and gained some back and have been at a consistant weight ever since (10 years).  I'm sure my inlaws talk about my body behind my back (they do about everyone else's) Slowly, my husband has gotten over his body image problems.  He still is hyper critical when he, on himself, can pinch an inch (and it takes two, two-hour bike rides to get rid of it!) but he loves me for who I am - and my body!  I really admire him for overcoming "the family issue". 

Our son is just like his dad, and our daughter is just like me.  Sometimes life just isn't fair!
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Re: The Loves of Our Lives
« Reply #28 on: April 12, 2006, 08:01:03 AM »
Oh wow, I've been thinking about this a lot lately. I am a bit overweight  and my boyfriend is the athletic type, you know and yes, sometimes I feel extremely weird when we go out. Beautiful girls look at him all the time, they don't even care I am there and it makes me feel so bad.

We met online too and my weight never seemed to be an issue, but when we first saw each other I could see on his face how disappointed he was, he was used to go out with nice, thin girls and I wasn't exactly that.
The first couple of days were truly horrible, there was a moment when I was about to ask him to leave my house because I was feeling really bad. But it was exactly then when he asked me to talk and he asked me to forgive him because he was really and he would like to start over again. I had to think about it a lot and decided I would give it a try as friends, we started doing things like playing football together at midnight and things like that. It was great and after a few days he told me he never felt that good with any other girl before, because he could be himself with me. He then asked me to give him a chance and asked me to be his girlfriend, of course I didn't say yes straight away, he didnt deserve it!!!!  >:D [smiley=beadyeyes.gif]

I have this problem now, I know he loves me, he shows it to me everyday. But I still feel insecure when we're together. I think we all have seen a couple where the guys is extremely hot and the girl isnt that much and what do we say? (Well, at least I have said it) "what is he doing with her?" I feel that's what people say when they see us together.
He tells me all the time he doesnt care about these things, that I'm beautiful and that our love is not just a superficial love based on looks that is deeper than that. I love to hear those things.
It's hard for me to believe these things after what happened before, he understands and he is being so patient with me. But I also understand that this is something I have to work about. I don't want my insecurities to ruin something as beautiful as what we have now.

Mysh

It's hard when everytime you turn your telly on you see these beautiful thin and tall girls and then you look at yourself and you don't look any close to that, but we all have to learn to love ourselves exactly the way we are. It's hard and it might take a bit time, but it's something we all must do.  We all are beautiful, big or small. And this may sound like a cliché, but appearences dont last forever and at the end what it counts it's what we have inside.


Re: The Loves of Our Lives
« Reply #29 on: April 12, 2006, 08:08:54 AM »
My exhusbeast really did a number on me. I was 123lbs when we met and shot up to 160 after our first son. He was always pushing me to lose weight for HIM. He wanted me to look like i "used to".  Now 3 sons and ten years later Im in a new marriage and I am still constantly obssessing about my weight. Im still about 160 but feel so bad about myself because Im not THIN. My husband is great. He doesnt care Im carrying a few extra pounds but Im scarred now.  Ill never feel thin enough or pretty enough.   :-\\\\


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