DH is STILL out of work...it has now been 3 mos!

Just another thought...If he is on Jobseekers..he is entitled to free training.  For example Forklifting, Computers, Office skills.  It may be worth him looking into.  If he is good on computers but he has no qualifications to back it up..then I think the jobcentre offers training to receive your E.C.D.L certificate ( European Computer Driving Licence )  It may teach him to suck eggs a little...but at least he can put it as a extra on his C.V and at no personal cost to him.

Also get him to check out some local colleges.  They usually offer cheaper course fees for people of benefits.

Hope things get better for you, sounds as tho your going along the right path

Just another thought...If he is on Jobseekers..he is entitled to free training.  For example Forklifting, Computers, Office skills.  It may be worth him looking into.  If he is good on computers but he has no qualifications to back it up..then I think the jobcentre offers training to receive your E.C.D.L certificate ( European Computer Driving Licence )  It may teach him to suck eggs a little...but at least he can put it as a extra on his C.V and at no personal cost to him.

Also get him to check out some local colleges.  They usually offer cheaper course fees for people of benefits.

Hope things get better for you, sounds as tho your going along the right path

The unfortunate reality here is that yes, they do offer training...but only once a person has been unemployed for 6 mos. or longer. We were hoping he could get help with some funding to become an energy assessor. He did an interview back at the beginning of Nov. but then found out after being called back to start, the 12-week course was going to cost £3450...he misunderstood and thought they meant £34.50. They were a bit misleading though.

He actually has a forklift license...just no forklift work in the local area.

We had a bit of a talk tonight and luckilly, without my intervention, his parents spoke up when we were at theirs for dinner (they're super supportive and, like me, just want to help him see for himself what his priorities need to be). DH finally admitted that it's been so daunting that he has just wanted to give up and doesn't know what he would do if I weren't here with him standing by him. He said he's finally going to bite the bullet this week and aim for a couple of part time jobs, cleaning toilets if necessary, just to start getting some money rolling in on his end.

We're also expecting to hear back from housing this week in regards to our points allocation so we can start bidding on properties. Sadly, his landlord is chargind twice the rent she should considering what she actually pays for the mortgage, rather than be a human and allow him to just cover what she owes -- so therefore she's getting a large amount of our money each month and not helping us get out of the hole. I'm hoping we can be out of here by the end of the month or by mid-March at least.

*sigh* I know this is all happening for a reason and I guess down the line I will appreciate why that is.

Sadly, his landlord is chargind twice the rent she should considering what she actually pays for the mortgage, rather than be a human and allow him to just cover what she owes -- so therefore she's getting a large amount of our money each month and not helping us get out of the hole.

I'm puzzled. I guess I haven't read this thread all that closely. Is she family or something?

6 month waiting!!  thats awful 

This might be worth a try instead. We have a company called Tabs training in the south and anyone who is seeking work who has not yet found a job can do some form of free training.  I know this is not local to you but it might be worth giving them a ring to see if there is a facility/company in your local area that they can point you towards.  You can do this scheme straight away as soon as your out of work as far as I am aware.  Anyone can do it as long as they have been in the UK for two years and over.  All he will have to do is take a document from the training company to any employment agency he is registered with for them to sign to say he is registered with them and actively seeking work.  It does not cost them anything to do it, just incase they query it.  Its a alternative to the Job Centre if they have not come up with anything.

www.tabs.ltd.uk

Hope that may be of some help 

I'm puzzled. I guess I haven't read this thread all that closely. Is she family or something?

*sigh*

She's a cow, IMHO. 

"She" is the sister of my sister-in-law's fiance (a fiance who is also DH's best mate). So kind of family. Trouble is...if we get funny with her, or if she takes it that way...she gripes to her brother (potentially) which could cause problems between him and my husband.

Cliff's Notes version: She is renting to DH, however, her mortgage agreement on this flat doesn't "allow" her to let the property...so she *could* get in trouble because she is pretending to still live here (all her mail still comes here) but she's really living with her partner and their new baby. When DH first moved in, it was supposed to be temporary until after I came over and then we would leave (but we didn't count on him losing his job). There is no tenancy agreement because of this being a private rental and with that we can't claim housing benefit because she refuses to admit we PAY her rent for fear of being found out. (Basically, we're trying to get out ASAP)

Reasons I think she's a cow: She's driving a brand-spanking new Audi...doesn't work...and living in a newly built (sufficiently heated) house...while we freeze in this icebox.

*breathe*

I'm ok now, hehe.

*sigh*

She's a cow, IMHO. 

Ohhhhh. Semifamily. That's the worst kind 

I think you should have a talk with him and make him realize your current situation (both of you) and express your concerns calmly.  I think if you discuss your goals and your desire to get out of your current living conditions, it may motivate him to work harder to obtain a job.  Make sure you don’t sound too accusing, because it will only do more harm than good.  I don’t suggest talking to his family as it will seem like you are rallying people to your side and ganging up against him.  Especially with the way things are now a job is quite difficult to obtain.

On the note of video games…
I think if played in moderation it’s a nice hobby to have, but if you feel that his game playing is prohibiting his productiveness, perhaps it is a good idea to have a talk and curb that hobby.  I have seen many people around me get completely lost in a game without them realizing it.

What about him doing a course to get the paper work for computer maintance and advertising maybe going self employed, if he can get a few jobs fixing PC'S then maybe that might help him get motivated and feel more positive about looking forward.

He doesn't have to charge alot, maybe he can get prices for parts ect and work out how much he can charge and do some flyers on the printer and put them through peoples doors and by getting some work it goes to word of mouth ect.

I hope this helps give you some ideas.

Indy

Hehe, your DH sounds a lot like mine. Mine does have a job and has worked in the same place for 17 years. When faced with losing our jobs, he was pretty depressed, thinking this wasn't the life he had planned for us when I moved over, and that no one would hire him, etc. Fortunately, we didn't end up in the place where you are, but I would bet that if we had lost our jobs, we would be in the same position you are in now. The thing is, he worked a factory job on rotating shifts for 16 years, and he always said he was "just a grunt" and he never thought he would do any better, even though he hated working late shifts or very early shifts, etc., and his feet were always aching. He is also an avid gamer and great with computers. So using that as an angle, I just told him how great he was with computers and how intelligent he is with figures, etc., and I convinced him to apply for an opening his company had for a production planner, since he knew the factory inside and out. And now he has a job he really loves and a lot more confidence. But when we were faced with losing our jobs, he seemed to lose that confidence once again. I basically worked on his CV for him, searched for some jobs for him and emailed the links to him to see what he was interested in, and took a big role in trying to help him get motivated to find something else. Times are really tough right now, so it's fortunate that we didn't have to look elsewhere, but maybe you could try to help him search for things on weekends when you have more time. I know you must be really frustrated, but try your best to be patient, as it is easy to get depressed about not finding a job, or only finding jobs that you don't want to do. Maybe he could offer to fix other people's computers for a bit of money? DH sometimes repairs laptops and things on the side, usually for free since he enjoys it, but sometimes his mates give him a bit of cash for helping them out. Also, if he can't find a job, maybe he just needs to get out of the house to stay motivated. When I first came here and was looking for a job, I volunteered at the local newspaper to just get out of the house and make a few friends, and that helped boost my confidence. Plus some of the people I met had leads on other jobs, so you never know where that might lead.
There was one thing that interested him a bit, which was working for the Ministry of Defense and I think they might still be recruiting, not sure. Maybe you could see if something like that interests him?
BTW, just saw I was cross-posted with Chris, below, who suggested he do some PC repair on the side. Good thinking, Batman!