Hahahah "have decided to use a metric meaningless to the outside world" baha. That seems to be pretty accurate.
Basically, here's the update:
Just two days ago (31st) I finally received the automatic email that my application has been opened.
I was relieved but still seriously considering retrospective priority processing, however immediately after I get a lovely email stating that I still needed to pay the IHS payment-- I had started my application online before they integrated that into the system..... obviously I have probably a fully-formed ulcer now.
The email was as follows:
"Immigration Health Surcharge (IHS) payment needed
On the 5th of July, we integrated the IHS payment solution into the online application process. Unfortunately, you may have started your online visa application before this date and did not make the required IHS payment separately before the facility was integrated. This means that you cannot now make your IHS payment and the application you have submitted has been deferred.
What you need to do next
In order to make your IHS payment, you must now:
• submit a fresh application via newcomer link: http://www.visa4uk.fco.gov.uk [nonactive] and make the IHS payment as part of that process.
• pay your visa fees (including any User Pay fees) again. These will be refunded.
• make an appointment to submit your biometrics at the Visa Application Centre but will not need to attend this appointment.
• Once you have completed this process please send an email to UKVINewYork.Correspondence@fco.gov.uk containing your name, the two GWF references (old and new) and the IHS reference number so that we can process your application and refund the duplicate payments.
Please note that if the new application and payment is not made within 5 working days from today then your application will be refused. If this is the only reason for refusing your application, you will have to make a new visa application and any new visa fees will not be refunded.
Kind Regards,
UK Visas & Immigration New York"
I had begun my application before the 5th of July and it wasn't even an option on the website the entire time, so I had completely blanked and somehow assumed it was still included? I don't know.
SO... I immediately did everything the email said, spending another $515 to submit a fresh online application, paying the IHS fee, emailed that address twice stating the needed information, with the second email politely asking for any form of response to just acknowledge that the email and information had been received and that the processing of the application is continuing.
No response as of yet, keeping the faith sort of, but with all of the extra money I've just spent I'm apprehensive to throw another $192 at this to get priority processing. Getting increasingly desperate but we'll see.