Communication!

So I'm starting a new topic, but please if this is covered in a nice topic feel free to delete it. I'm new here and I am fairly certain that you all have possibly changed in your communication style with the general public.  Have you noticed how your personality has changed or how you may have changed in how you express yourself to the general public?

Personally in the short two months I have been here, I actually witnessed a woman snarl at me as soon as I started speaking (I have a mild American accent).  I chalk it up to her being older and having a bias against Americans.  Then here's a funny story for today.  I was opening a new bank account and the Barclays Bank manager asked me my previous address to which I stated in my perfectly vanilla Colorado American accent, "Fox Paw Trail".  I see her type out on her PC "Box Par Tail".  Now at this point, I wasn't sure whether to laugh or cry.  Here I thought my accent was pretty clear, especially since Russians say that if you want the clearest American accent, one should move to Colorado.  We talk through our noses to Brits I think.

Anyway, I thought I would start this topic and just ask the question: how do you think you have changed in your communication style, if at all, since you moved here?


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I definitely favour the British variations on words now. Thing like rubbish, trousers, knickers, etc. It didn't really kick in until I started working retail and was interacting a lot with strangers. I slip right back into my Americanisms when I speak to family or other Americans though. I've definitely picked up other British/Welsh turns of phrase as well, but tend to drop those when I'm with Americans too. I don't think my accent has changed too much, though it's hard to tell. I'm from the Deep South and I tend to get a positive reaction from Brits about my accent. I'm about to start a new job so I'm interests to see if it changes more when I'm in an office environment and on the phone a lot.


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I lived in Texas for a long time before I lived in Colorado for close to 20 years. I all but lost my "twang" and felt like I kind of maintained a Midwestern type of accent.  I can absolutely see how you would change phrases or words and I can relate to how your accent itself may change. I guess I'm referring to feeling a self consciousness that I haven't experienced before. I am leaning towards speaking less, say when I see someone in a country lane who wants to talk to me about why she hasn't thought to put the "Wellies" on that day.  I just want to nod and give a courtesy laugh and not "reveal" that I'm a foreigner.  I know this is personal, I'm hoping I just get over it because I feel like I just want to blend in and not attract attention.


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Aw, Persephone. I'm sorry you feel that way. Honestly, British people say their vowels WAY differently than we do. I still can't believe that for my husband 'book' rhymes with 'f*ck'. Sorry to be a bit crass, but that one REALLY makes me laugh.

It is easy to be self-conscious when one person reacts negatively to how you speak. My husband's uncle was pretty rude about how I quite literally said, 'Thank you for inviting us to your son's wedding.' The rise and fall and cadence of my voice is what he was making fun off. It really stung.

I would bet that most people will react positively to you. There are a few bad apples, but there always are.

Thanks Iyonaria . I like the way your husband says the "f" word, even that sounds more refined. Haha.  When I visited before or at least when I had little exposure, I really liked how I just spoke and I didn't give a fook!  I want to get back to that place but I'm generally an introverted, sensitive type so this will be a challenge.


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I've noticed lately that I'm having trouble understanding dialogue on UK TV programmes. (I've lived in the UK over 20 years).  I can hear/understand US shows fine though.  Is it selective deafness?

I've noticed lately that I'm having trouble understanding dialogue on UK TV programmes. (I've lived in the UK over 20 years).  I can hear/understand US shows fine though.  Is it selective deafness?

I don't think so. I always understand the US shows just fine, but often have to turn up the UK shows because it seems like the words being said are a bit mushy and not as distinct. When my husband is talking and the radio is on his voice seems to blend in with the radio...

Thanks Iyonaria . I like the way your husband says the "f" word, even that sounds more refined. Haha.  When I visited before or at least when I had little exposure, I really liked how I just spoke and I didn't give a fook!  I want to get back to that place but I'm generally an introverted, sensitive type so this will be a challenge.

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You're in a new place that you want to settle into and start meeting people and creating positive relationships... Since you're introverted and sensitive it makes sense that you're a bit nervous! I definitely understand that feeling. For me, I just wanted people to like me so I could have conversations with them and start making friends.

It takes a little while to get comfortable in a new place, even one you have spent time visiting. It's not just a holiday anymore, it's your day to day life! I know I didn't take into account when I first moved from Grand Junction. It's taken awhile, but I'm definitely settling in.

I don't think so. I always understand the US shows just fine, but often have to turn up the UK shows because it seems like the words being said are a bit mushy and not as distinct. When my husband is talking and the radio is on his voice seems to blend in with the radio...

Hahaha I absolutely have this problem too. My husband is a mumbler, but I have trouble understanding him sometimes when he isn't mumbling. And I hate how I can never tell if a place name or other word I've never heard before ends in an -er sound when a Brit says them. Then I feel stupid about not being able to spell it properly or say it properly in my natural accent.

Back to the OP, I definitely have the same feeling of just not wanting to talk or just get by with a mumbled "hiya" or "sorry," both of which I can manage to sound like a native while saying. It's less out of negative reactions and more out of just wanting to be left alone to live my life and not answer a load of questions about where I'm from/why I'm here. People are usually just polite and inquisitive but obviously that stuff gets old really quickly. I'm and introvert too so I do miss being able to go out in public and remain entirely invisible if I want.


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Back to the OP, I definitely have the same feeling of just not wanting to talk or just get by with a mumbled "hiya" or "sorry," both of which I can manage to sound like a native while saying. It's less out of negative reactions and more out of just wanting to be left alone to live my life and not answer a load of questions about where I'm from/why I'm here. People are usually just polite and inquisitive but obviously that stuff gets old really quickly.

This. Exactly this.

I've been here for three years now and I feel the biggest change in my way of speaking is that I enunciate more. Or so I thought...

I went home recently for an extended trip and pretty much all of my friends and family have decided that I now have a British accent. Even people I didn't even know that well, or at all, felt the same (waiters/waitresses, my hairdresser, etc). There were a couple of times I got a, "So, where are you from?" from cashiers in checkout lines. In my hometown!

Then I came back here and, because I work in a predominantly customer-facing environment, I am bombarded with very much the same types of statements/questions, only that I sound Canadian. Sometimes people ask which part of Canada I'm from, and I jokingly reply with a huge grin, "The Texan part," to which the asker turns red and apologizes profusely.

There is no escaping it now. Outside of work, I just try to get through the day without speaking to anyone. If I can manage with a smile and a nod, I'm perfectly happy. (I could only be so lucky...

Most of my experience here has been pretty positive - although it's only been just over a year now.  I've even had a couple of people  remark that I had a lovely accent!  To be honest, I never thought of my California accent as lovely (I never really thought of it as an accent actually!  ), but it was nice to hear.

Like others, I have started using British terms for certain things - but not all.  I'm about to be a grandmother for the first time (yay!) and I'm making my daughter a diaper bag.  As I collect the bits I need for it, I really have a hard time calling it a nappy bag.  I don't know why that sounds so silly to my ear. 

I've only had two changes in accent pointed out.  The first one by my sister who says I now say "ehm" rather than "uhm".  I just laughed at that, but now my daughter says the same thing.  Then my husband points out I don't pronounce "I" the same anymore.  Evidently I now pronounce it more like "ah" than "eye".  I looked at him rather skeptically and responded, "no 'ah' don't!".   Who knew?!?

So I've decided to just go with it and work up a unique accent I call Califordie (we live in Geordie country up here).  Most of the time I find the differences rather entertaining, but I'm retired and I'm not sure I'd be so cavalier if I had to work and deal with large numbers of people pointing out the way I speak.

Persephone, where did you end up moving to?  I think you were going to be close to me (I'm in Wokingham).

We're having an expat meetup at the Five Guys in Reading at the Oracle on Sunday for lunch if you wanted to join us.  Mmmmmm, Five Guys.

And I still sound 100% American, though I believe I speak softer than I used to.  I definitely use British slang.  You can take the girl out of America...

Hey KFdancer, no I'm not far from you or Reading for that matter.  I'm in a town called Tadley which is dead center of Newbury, Reading and Basingstoke.  What time are you all meeting up? I am definitely interested and I really appreciate the invite. It may help my spirits a little . 


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Hey KFdancer, no I'm not far from you or Reading for that matter.  I'm in a town called Tadley which is dead center of Newbury, Reading and Basingstoke.  What time are you all meeting up? I am definitely interested and I really appreciate the invite. It may help my spirits a little . 


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I sent you a PM.  Would be fun if you could come!

Hey KFdancer, no I'm not far from you or Reading for that matter.  I'm in a town called Tadley which is dead center of Newbury, Reading and Basingstoke.  What time are you all meeting up? I am definitely interested and I really appreciate the invite. It may help my spirits a little . 


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There are a couple people I know of who are floating around that area, one of them being in Tadley. The other is not far from there. I'm sure they would love to meet up, as well. We have meetups out that way from time to time so we will have to get together (there's a whole big group of us)! We're always looking for new friends. That said, take it from me that KFdancer is totally lovely and I'm sure you will have a great time with her!!

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