My family thinks I'm moving into the palace!

Ok, not literally but they are acting like I'm leaving them for this charmed life in England. My grandmother (who has actually been very verbally abusive lately) yelled at me a couple months ago, "Well all you have to worry about it just getting to England then all your problems are gone!" As if I don't have to worry about 1. I was 80% through with university over here and I have to give it all up because my credits won't transfer and accounting is very different between the two countries, 2. Alex barely makes enough to pay the 900/month rent around London then have enough money to pay for his rail card, counsel tax and other utilities, our food, and student loan payments on my now useless near-degree, 3. We cannot find a dog friendly flat that is under 2000/ month, 4. I have to now find a job with no degree in a country I've spent a total of 5 months in!

The list could go on but you get the idea. Alex and I got married last week, he spent all this money just to come elope with me for the sake of the visa and all my grandfather had to say was, "Very good, maybe now you can stop whining." He posted that on the photos of my impromptu wedding on Facebook! I have posted on facebook twice in the last four months in regards to my situation, hardly "whining". Not to mention I haven't seen my grandfather or spoken to him in about 5 years.

Then when I was distraught over the first visa rejection I told my friend that I wanted to go home. She replied, "But this is your home, don't be silly, this will always be your home. " No this isn't my home anymore. My husband and fur-babies are 3000 miles away. My home is where they are and it kills me to not be with them.

I wish I could explain to my friends and family that this is not a fairy tale, I do NOT live a charmed life, and I am truly sorry for overstaying my welcome while my visa gets bungled/ more f-ed up by the day, but I want more than anything just to go home. I understand it is cool for people from the States to visit London and it is a blessing to be able to vacation halfway across the world but I am not on vacation! I am fighting tooth and nail to be with my husband whom I would follow to the ends of the earth.

His family has been amazingly supportive and offer help on a regular basis but mine is so selfish and self serving. Sorry for the anger but did anyone else get this from their friends and family when they moved to England?

If it makes you feel better, I might be a version of you 15 years in the future.  My home is unquestionably the UK, it's where my kids are born.  I never think wistfully of moving to the states. 

My family in the states get on with their lives and dramas, and I participate as much as I choose.  I ignore Face Book.  Every 4 years or so we come back for a visit and that's that.

It's perfectly feasible for you to move to the Uk and have the life you want.  It's been done many times before.

Yes, some members of my family have ridiculous ideas about how easy things are for me, but a few thousand miles makes it a lot easier to completely ignore that silliness.

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I wish I could explain to my friends and family that this is not a fairy tale, I do NOT live a charmed life, and I am truly sorry for overstaying my welcome while my visa gets bungled/ more f-ed up by the day, but I want more than anything just to go home. I understand it is cool for people from the States to visit London and it is a blessing to be able to vacation halfway across the world but I am not on vacation! I am fighting tooth and nail to be with my husband whom I would follow to the ends of the earth.

THIS! Yes, I totally understand! My family think I live in some quaint little village in the English countryside, surrounded by castles and I can get to Scotland, Wales and London all within a short bus ride away for some reason.

I was in the UK on a student visa for six years (two degrees) and now on a fiancee visa and I think the biggest thing they dont understand is the cost of it all. They thought I could just get married and because I would be married to a British citizen then that was that and I would never have another worry in my life ever again. Oh how wrong they are!

My friends back in the US have been great. I think they still see it as I'm on some sort of adventure but that feeling passed a long time ago! My family at first made me feel bad for leaving but I think they more or less accept it now, especially since they really like my fiance and want to see me married :-P There are plenty of dramas going on over there still but like jimbocz said, being a few thousand miles away helps me not be dragged into it all!

I wouldn't be too hard on them.  People react in different ways and say stupid things when they think they are being 'abandoned'.  For others, it's just incomprehensible to move away from your family or to take that kind of risk as they see it.  Some people are insular, some are not.  You'll find the same dynamics with people here in the UK.  It's an aspect of human nature. 

At least you are cognisant that it's not going to be a faerie tale.  Moving countries in difficult and expensive, and it doesn't magically solve any internal problems or issues in life.  However, not to be trite, but life is what you make of it.  I've been here about a decade and am a citizen now, and I just don't think about it much any more.  I don't hate the US, and I don't view UK as a utopian paradise either.  Interestingly, I get along with my family better than ever with an ocean separating us.  As the others have said, being free of family drama is liberating.  Going back to the issue of your family and their grouchiness, they probably just don't want you to be far away.  Try to see the positive behind their annoying behaviour  Good luck!