Since I started this post towards the end of January things have now progressed.
I didn't receive the form saying that she had got the divorce petition papers and she was refusing to communicate with me on any level.
I called the police and got their advice regarding the car. To cut a long story short... I sent her an email stating that I wanted the car back or the police would be involved and she sent one back saying I could go and collect it.... Good news.
I had to apply to the court to have duplicate papers sent out to a process server who was going to the address I had to make sure she indeed got them. Two days before they were going to try and serve her I got the form in the post saying that she had received them and the divorce can now go ahead.
It's been a long horrible and expensive journey for me and it didn't work out. I feel a huge sense of loss and failure. I'm still grieving for what could have been, but as the weeks and months progress it does get a little better.
My advice to anyone embarking on getting married and moving here on a Spousal Visa is to come over on an extended holiday visa... (you can stay for 6 months) and see if you actually can live here. It's a different world to thinking you will and being here.
If anyone needs advice on what to do for a DIY Divorce I'm now unfortunately pretty much an expert.
There'll be one more post after this one when the Decree Absolute comes through and I can finally say it's done.