Prayers and good wishes needed

When our last cat, who was a week shy of 21 years old when she died, left us after having been there with us for all but her first 5 weeks of life, it was like having part of my heart ripped out. There was no way she was going to recover from her final illness.  I was fortunate in that I had a sympathetic vet, and was able to  stay home with the kitty over a period of a few days until she slipped away in her sleep, having had no pain for those last days thanks to the liberal application of the narcotics. So many people tried to say "the right thing" when they heard she'd gone, but there is no right thing to say, really.  It hurts, you grieve, in time, you remember them fondly and the pain is less. I still miss her. I still miss my first cat, who died in the 1970s... They are such a special part of our lives - they are family.

Like the people who wanted to comfort me, I really wish there was something I could write that would ease the pain of this for you. But the best I can do is offer a virtual hug.  I'm so sorry your friend has to go.

Today is the day.  We had a wonderful day yesterday, the steroid shot really perked her up.  She's a bit down again today, so today is the right choice.  Just so hard to believe how much she's gone downhill in only a week.

Had a tough moment with my daughter this morning when I explained that Copper won't be coming back home, but I know she'll spring back quickly.  Last night was hard as my husband was really upset. 

I'm glad to give her peace.  I'm very sad for us.  We think Sobe knows.  We gave them chicken last night (first time!) and Sobe patiently waited while Copper ate all that she wanted!  He only had a bit after she finished.  We have two weeks at home until we are gon for two weeks.  We'll see how Sobe does.  We may arrange for him to stay with someone while we are gone if he's struggling by himself.

Today is the day.  We had a wonderful day yesterday, the steroid shot really perked her up.  She's a bit down again today, so today is the right choice.  Just so hard to believe how much she's gone downhill in only a week.

Had a tough moment with my daughter this morning when I explained that Copper won't be coming back home, but I know she'll spring back quickly.  Last night was hard as my husband was really upset. 

I'm glad to give her peace.  I'm very sad for us.  We think Sobe knows.  We gave them chicken last night (first time!) and Sobe patiently waited while Copper ate all that she wanted!  He only had a bit after she finished.  We have two weeks at home until we are gon for two weeks.  We'll see how Sobe does.  We may arrange for him to stay with someone while we are gone if he's struggling by himself.

My heart goes out to you and your family... and especially Sobe.  I'm glad you had a good day with Copper yesterday.  I wish there was something any of us could do to make this easier.

Today is the day.  We had a wonderful day yesterday, the steroid shot really perked her up.  She's a bit down again today, so today is the right choice.  Just so hard to believe how much she's gone downhill in only a week.

Had a tough moment with my daughter this morning when I explained that Copper won't be coming back home, but I know she'll spring back quickly.  Last night was hard as my husband was really upset. 

I'm glad to give her peace.  I'm very sad for us.  We think Sobe knows.  We gave them chicken last night (first time!) and Sobe patiently waited while Copper ate all that she wanted!  He only had a bit after she finished.  We have two weeks at home until we are gon for two weeks.  We'll see how Sobe does.  We may arrange for him to stay with someone while we are gone if he's struggling by himself.

Sending love and prayers to you all

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Only just saw this. I'm so sorry for your loss. I know how crushing it can be, and I hope you know you're in our thoughts. Xxxxx


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Thanks guys.  I've mostly had a huge since of relief since she went to sleep.  We've had a very busy day which is what we needed. 

I truly am a cat lady to the core.  I've always limited myself to two (though we won't contemplate another until Sobe goes).  I never thought I'd have kids (honestly, I was "take it or leave it" with kids.  Very happy we chose to have them and were able but I know I would have lived a happy life without).  But I could never live without animals.  When I meet people, I don't ask if they have kids, I ask if they have pets!   

Thanks guys.  I've mostly had a huge since of relief since she went to sleep.  We've had a very busy day which is what we needed. 

I truly am a cat lady to the core.  I've always limited myself to two (though we won't contemplate another until Sobe goes).  I never thought I'd have kids (honestly, I was "take it or leave it" with kids.  Very happy we chose to have them and were able but I know I would have lived a happy life without).  But I could never live without animals.  When I meet people, I don't ask if they have kids, I ask if they have pets!   

I get you completely.  I am, unfortunately, mildly allergic to cats.  But before I moved to the UK, I never let that stop me.  I've lived with cats since I was five.  But my husband is more seriously allergic.   In fact, when I first came over with my clothing and things, he was miserable for weeks, until we slowly filtered all the cat-infested stuff through the laundry and vacuum.  I didn't realize 'til later that it was my fault, and not just an unusually bad season for him.  So, no cats for us.  I couldn't do that to him. 

Kids were never a consideration for us.  We are too selfish and irresponsible to share our limited resources with kids. 

Kids were never a consideration for us.  We are too selfish and irresponsible to share our limited resources with kids. 

Same here!

Same here!

My daughter's nursery fees are over £1100 a month...  which means we've paid over £30,000 in nursery fees in the last two years and 4 months.  And we'll have two in nursery soon.  If that doesn't make you feel sick....  nothing will!

My daughter's nursery fees are over £1100 a month...  which means we've paid over £30,000 in nursery fees in the last two years and 4 months.  And we'll have two in nursery soon.  If that doesn't make you feel sick....  nothing will!

So it's as expensive here as in the US, then?  I assumed there would be a better system in place and it would be more affordable here.

So it's as expensive here as in the US, then?  I assumed there would be a better system in place and it would be more affordable here.

I think it's much more expensive here.  I've always heard to budget $1,000 a month in the US.  And as salaries are higher there...  <sigh>

I think it's much more expensive here.  I've always heard to budget $1,000 a month in the US.  And as salaries are higher there...  <sigh>

Oh, maybe the place my friends' little girl went was just at the higher end of the price range.  Her spot (a facility on the Boeing campus in Everett, WA) was about $1400/month ($350/week) for infant care in 2008.

My daughter's nursery fees are over £1100 a month...  which means we've paid over £30,000 in nursery fees in the last two years and 4 months.  And we'll have two in nursery soon.  If that doesn't make you feel sick....  nothing will!

That much money is approaching nanny territory, which was our solution. We had several nannies over the years and generally tried to get one who had her own child to take care of as well and therefore was a bit cheaper.  It generally worked out great as they could pick up from school and be more flexible than a nursery. 

Last month was the finish of all that though, our kids are old enough to take care of themselves.  In fact, the 14 year old is an expert in most things.

That much money is approaching nanny territory, which was our solution. We had several nannies over the years and generally tried to get one who had her own child to take care of as well and therefore was a bit cheaper.  It generally worked out great as they could pick up from school and be more flexible than a nursery. 

Last month was the finish of all that though, our kids are old enough to take care of themselves.  In fact, the 14 year old is an expert in most things.

A nanny would be less money with two...  but my kid LOVES nursery.

When both are in school, I'd like us to get an au pair.  But I know they are limited hours so not an option until then.

An ugly au pair might be best. 

We've had some really nice relationships with nannies over the years.