Author Topic: Can I leave before getting the divorce?  (Read 269 times)

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Offline Sealpoint

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Can I leave before getting the divorce?
« on: November 11, 2017, 01:24:32 PM »
I've been in the UK since 2012.  I didn't go for citizenship just have the ILR.  My husband has been verbally abusive and yesterday became physically abusive with me.  I'm trying to deal with the police and the different things in the UK to get protection from him, but I keep having difficulty.  It doesn't help that I don't know anyone here except his family.  I just want to go home and never come back.  Do I have to stay until the divorce is final or do you know if I can just leave and deal with it abroad?  And... can anyone recommend a good shipper?  The one I used coming here was horrible.

Offline KFdancer

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Re: Can I leave before getting the divorce?
« Reply #1 on: November 11, 2017, 01:27:30 PM »
So sorry to hear this.  Keep yourself safe.

If you don’t have any kids together, go ahead and return to the US.  You can even file for divorce there if you want.

I’ve always heard good things about Robinsons for moves.

Offline Sealpoint

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Re: Can I leave before getting the divorce?
« Reply #2 on: November 11, 2017, 01:57:58 PM »
No kids.  That's the silver lining in this whole thing.  Thanks for the information.  I appreciate it.

Offline x0Kiss0fDeath

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Re: Can I leave before getting the divorce?
« Reply #3 on: November 11, 2017, 08:53:06 PM »
So sorry to hear the news and that you've been having to deal with this situation. Definitely recommend going back and filing for divorce once back in the US.

Offline TravelingFrog

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Re: Can I leave before getting the divorce?
« Reply #4 on: November 11, 2017, 10:45:37 PM »
I'm so sorry to hear this, Sealpoint.

I think we arrived in the UK around the same time (summer 2012) and went through FLR and ILR together. We were in that weird group of applicants just before the 9 July rule change that feared being wrongly put on the new rules track.

This is probably the absolute last thing on your mind, but once you're safe and settled, have a think about whether you want to apply for UK citizenship. Right now, you might never want to come back to the UK, but once you're out of this situation and away from him, you may feel differently. It is a big step, but we've seen people who could have applied for citizenship leave without it and later regretted it. It's just something to keep in the back of your mind once life has calmed down a bit. The application would have absolutely nothing to do with your (ex)husband since you've had ILR for more than a year.

I hope your move back goes smoothly and you're able to work with the police to feel safe. Keep us updated if you can!
July 2012 - Fiancée Visa | Nov 2012 - Married
Dec 2012 - FLR | Nov 2014 - ILR | Dec 2015 - UK Citizen

Offline Sealpoint

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Re: Can I leave before getting the divorce?
« Reply #5 on: November 12, 2017, 10:56:08 AM »
TravelingFrog, We did come over at the same time and talked a few times.  You were a few days before me and really helped me out.  I've thought of the citizenship as an option and if I have the money I might do it, but I can't see myself coming back if I leave.  You never know what will happen though.  10 Years ago I never would have believed this would be my life.  Thanks for your response. 

Offline TravelingFrog

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Re: Can I leave before getting the divorce?
« Reply #6 on: November 12, 2017, 12:34:15 PM »
TravelingFrog, We did come over at the same time and talked a few times.  You were a few days before me and really helped me out.  I've thought of the citizenship as an option and if I have the money I might do it, but I can't see myself coming back if I leave.  You never know what will happen though.  10 Years ago I never would have believed this would be my life.  Thanks for your response.

You never know what will happen down the road.

You could look at UK citizenship as a way to move back to the UK in the future or as a way to move out of the US if you ever wanted to live or retire abroad.

Either way, if you've got the money for it and have the time to apply, I don't think you'd regret getting it.

Hope you're doing well.
July 2012 - Fiancée Visa | Nov 2012 - Married
Dec 2012 - FLR | Nov 2014 - ILR | Dec 2015 - UK Citizen