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Topic: Feeling Low  (Read 3356 times)

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Feeling Low
« on: December 06, 2017, 04:02:38 PM »
I just need a vent.

Job hunting sucks.  I've had some momentum in recent weeks but everything seems to have ground to a halt.  Supposed to have another round of interviews for Company B this week but still no date/time.  Told today that it'll be next week sometime but that recruiting will go into the new year (at least they are setting realistic expectations).  Company A still hasn't let me know if I'm onto the next round or not.  I'm far enough in that I expect to hear even if it's a no.

The baby does NOT sleep.  We started sleep training last night in the hopes that this will improve things.  Last night was tough - but at least he didn't wake the three year old.

At the weekend my mom told me that I'm really negative about things lately.  I get that.  It was a fair comment.  But no sleep and no job prospects (I'm very career driven) is really getting me down. 

I need a pick me up!


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Re: Feeling Low
« Reply #1 on: December 06, 2017, 04:05:10 PM »
Big hug. x


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Re: Feeling Low
« Reply #2 on: December 06, 2017, 04:11:12 PM »
You are so close to getting a really good job, it's going to come any day.  I give it 50/50 before Christmas. 


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Re: Feeling Low
« Reply #3 on: December 06, 2017, 04:14:58 PM »
You are so close to getting a really good job, it's going to come any day.  I give it 50/50 before Christmas.

It would be SOO nice to have something secured before Christmas.  I give it a 100% chance of not happening.  As I'm certain Company A will go internal.  And there's nothing else out there right now.

I feel bad as my parents will be here at Christmas and I know I'll still be on my negative streak.  I had budgeted to be out of work until the New Year.  We've got savings but I don't want to touch it.   ;)


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Re: Feeling Low
« Reply #4 on: December 06, 2017, 04:25:23 PM »
I'm sorry this has been so frustrating for you.  I wish there was something I could say or do to cheer you up.

But, well... in the words of Bill Clinton, all I can say is "I feel your pain."  My husband is in a similar situation.  While he's in a job, we desperately need him to be in a different one... closer to our house.  We are waiting to hear back from his interview a week and a half ago.  Other than that, we have no other prospects pending.  If he doesn't get this one, it's going to be a rather depressing Christmas.  This job hope is the thing that has been keeping us going since hitting the one-year mark in our house last month.
9/1/2013 - "fiancée" (marriage) visa issued
4/6/2013 - married (certificate issued same-day)
5/6/2013 - FLR(M)#1 in person -- approved!
8/1/2016 - FLR(M)#2 by post -- approved!
8/5/2018 - ILR in person -- approved!
22/11/2018 - Citizenship (online, with NDRS+JCAP) -- approved!
14/12/2018 - I became a British citizen.  :)


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Re: Feeling Low
« Reply #5 on: December 06, 2017, 04:36:15 PM »
Job hunting sucks.


At the weekend my mom told me that I'm really negative about things lately.  I get that.  It was a fair comment.  But no sleep and no job prospects (I'm very career driven) is really getting me down. 

I need a pick me up!

Job hunting is literally my least favorite thing to do ever. I usually end up in an ok job because I don't have it in me to keep facing rejection and I'm agreeable enough to just do whatever to keep a roof over my head and active. Be thankful that you know your worth, have savings (if needed), and know the type of position you want and need :) Waiting is worth it for those!  I hope you hear something soon. Companies usually ramp up hiring after the holidays.


With regards to your mom's comment ... Family are sometimes the least understanding of any type of adversity. Negativity happens when you're going through challenging times, and I'd say job hunting with a baby at home who doesn't sleep fits the bill there. I hope she also asked if there was anything she could do to help!

Is there anything small you need from the states that would make you smile? I land on the 21st and would be happy to bring something :)


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Re: Feeling Low
« Reply #6 on: December 06, 2017, 04:47:45 PM »
I'm sorry this has been so frustrating for you.  I wish there was something I could say or do to cheer you up.

But, well... in the words of Bill Clinton, all I can say is "I feel your pain."  My husband is in a similar situation.  While he's in a job, we desperately need him to be in a different one... closer to our house.  We are waiting to hear back from his interview a week and a half ago.  Other than that, we have no other prospects pending.  If he doesn't get this one, it's going to be a rather depressing Christmas.  This job hope is the thing that has been keeping us going since hitting the one-year mark in our house last month.

Totally hear you.  While I don't NEED to be employed right this minute, I'm a planner and I hate not knowing the future.

I've still got my fingers crossed for your hubby!!!


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Re: Feeling Low
« Reply #7 on: December 06, 2017, 04:49:15 PM »
Job hunting is literally my least favorite thing to do ever. I usually end up in an ok job because I don't have it in me to keep facing rejection and I'm agreeable enough to just do whatever to keep a roof over my head and active. Be thankful that you know your worth, have savings (if needed), and know the type of position you want and need :) Waiting is worth it for those!  I hope you hear something soon. Companies usually ramp up hiring after the holidays.


With regards to your mom's comment ... Family are sometimes the least understanding of any type of adversity. Negativity happens when you're going through challenging times, and I'd say job hunting with a baby at home who doesn't sleep fits the bill there. I hope she also asked if there was anything she could do to help!

Is there anything small you need from the states that would make you smile? I land on the 21st and would be happy to bring something :)


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Job hunting definitely blows!

Aww thanks for the offer.  My parents are over at Christmas as is my UK American BFF!  I really just need my parents to bring the suitcase I forgot in September (seriously, sleep deprivation!)


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Re: Feeling Low
« Reply #8 on: December 06, 2017, 05:00:58 PM »
Totally hear you.  While I don't NEED to be employed right this minute, I'm a planner and I hate not knowing the future.

I've still got my fingers crossed for your hubby!!!

Thanks, KF!

Meanwhile, I completely understand your need to know.  Before I made the decision to come over to meet my now-husband, I made a spreadsheet!  We discussed everything, I weighed the finances, and I had contingency plans.  While it was all very quick, I left little to chance.  Admittedly, finding my life partner isn't quite the same as finding a job.  But it kind of is, too.

Anyway, I hope you find a good fit very soon, and definitely before your holiday so you can enjoy that trip!
9/1/2013 - "fiancée" (marriage) visa issued
4/6/2013 - married (certificate issued same-day)
5/6/2013 - FLR(M)#1 in person -- approved!
8/1/2016 - FLR(M)#2 by post -- approved!
8/5/2018 - ILR in person -- approved!
22/11/2018 - Citizenship (online, with NDRS+JCAP) -- approved!
14/12/2018 - I became a British citizen.  :)


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Re: Feeling Low
« Reply #9 on: December 06, 2017, 06:13:04 PM »
Job hunting definitely blows!

Aww thanks for the offer.  My parents are over at Christmas as is my UK American BFF!  I really just need my parents to bring the suitcase I forgot in September (seriously, sleep deprivation!)
Aww. I'm glad they will all be around! Hopefully you get some grandma babysitting in so you can catch up on sleep a bit!

My current state while wrapping up work for the day ... Elly has become super cuddly while everything in the house changes.



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Re: Feeling Low
« Reply #10 on: December 06, 2017, 06:55:38 PM »
Aww. I'm glad they will all be around! Hopefully you get some grandma babysitting in so you can catch up on sleep a bit!

My current state while wrapping up work for the day ... Elly has become super cuddly while everything in the house changes.



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What a sweet baby!!!!


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Re: Feeling Low
« Reply #11 on: December 06, 2017, 08:05:40 PM »
Can I recommend the book Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child? I got it as a baby shower gift six years ago and it’s been invaluable.

Re the job, that sounds really frustrating. I would feel frustrated re the job, but I would gentle on myself re finances and budgeting. If you *have* the savings, just be thankful that you do and use what you need. It’s not your fault that you’re in this situation and you shouldn’t further punish yourself by feeling guilty about dipping into your savings. In fact, be proud that you’ve been so responsible that you’ve got the savings to draw upon when times are a little tough.
You’re obviously extremely clever and driven and the right job will find YOU. These things take time (which i know you know).
Best of luck and keep us posted.
Sept 2001 - June 2006: studied at the University of Glasgow and the University of Strathclyde
Aug 2010 - Dec 2010: in UK on holiday visa
Jan 2011: issued fiancée visa
July 2011: issued FLR(M)
March 2012: DD1
June 2013: issued ILR
November 2013: DD2


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Re: Feeling Low
« Reply #12 on: December 07, 2017, 09:56:03 AM »
Aww, KFDancer, I can see totally why you're feeling very low. Sleep deprivation will really mess with anyone's resolve.  And I totally get when a career is part of your identity and when you don't have it, you don't know who you are.
 I've got no advice, but just hang in there. I will keep my fingers crossed that the wee man will sleep and you will get sleep. And I will keep my fingers crossed for you that a job shows up soon. 
I've never gotten food on my underpants!
Work permit (2007) to British Citizen (2014)
You're stuck with me!


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Re: Feeling Low
« Reply #13 on: December 07, 2017, 10:14:50 AM »
Can I recommend the book Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child? I got it as a baby shower gift six years ago and it’s been invaluable.

Re the job, that sounds really frustrating. I would feel frustrated re the job, but I would gentle on myself re finances and budgeting. If you *have* the savings, just be thankful that you do and use what you need. It’s not your fault that you’re in this situation and you shouldn’t further punish yourself by feeling guilty about dipping into your savings. In fact, be proud that you’ve been so responsible that you’ve got the savings to draw upon when times are a little tough.
You’re obviously extremely clever and driven and the right job will find YOU. These things take time (which i know you know).
Best of luck and keep us posted.

Thanks for the kind words.  I’ll have a look at that book.  He’s a very sweet, cuddly baby.  He just likes to say hello every 90 minutes or so.   ;) 


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Re: Feeling Low
« Reply #14 on: December 07, 2017, 10:17:06 AM »
Aww, KFDancer, I can see totally why you're feeling very low. Sleep deprivation will really mess with anyone's resolve.  And I totally get when a career is part of your identity and when you don't have it, you don't know who you are.
 I've got no advice, but just hang in there. I will keep my fingers crossed that the wee man will sleep and you will get sleep. And I will keep my fingers crossed for you that a job shows up soon.

Sleep deprivation is no joke!  It’s definitely a fantastic form of torture!

I heard from Company A today that they hope to make a decision by the end of this week and thanking me for my patience.   ::)


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