Hi it's me again...trying to see what documents we need to gather.
I'm looking at the online form and appendix 2 form VAF4A and finding them impossibly confusing for example they refer to the friend offering accommodation as the sponser, but I thought as the UK citizen and spouse that I was the sponser for my husband?
All I can understand is that we need proof of our marriage here in the states and proof of our pensions and a supporting letter from our friend in the UK who is offering accommodation while we flat hunt....surely there are other documents required?
I have a headache already 
You are the sponsor.
It helps if you remember that the form is a "one size fits all" and covers all sorts of different situations. Just take each question at face value and explain in your sponsor letter that you will be living with friends.
You need to prove the financial, accommodation and relationship requirements.
This is what the guidance says about proving pension income. You must be careful to provide exactly what is asked for.
e) To evidence a pension:
(i) Official documentation from:
(1) The Department for Work and Pensions (in respect of the Basic State Pension and the Additional or Second State Pension) or other government department or agency, including the Veterans Agency;
(2) An overseas pension authority; or
(3) A pension company,
confirming pension entitlement and amount (and, where applicable, reflecting any funds withdrawn from the pension account or fund).
(ii) At least one personal bank statement in the 12-month period prior to the date of application showing payment of the pension into the person’s account.
(iii) For the purposes of sub-paragraph (i), War Disablement Pension, War Widow’s/Widower’s Pension and any other pension or equivalent payment for life made under the War Pensions Scheme, the Armed Forces Compensation Scheme or the Armed Forces Attributable Benefits Scheme may be treated as a pension, unless excluded under paragraph 21 of this Appendix.
https://www.gov.uk/guidance/immigration-rules/immigration-rules-appendix-fm-se-family-members-specified-evidenceFor the accommodation requirement, you need a letter from your friend granting you and your husband permission to live there when his visa is granted, stating the number of occupants and rooms and that there will be no overcrowding.
You also need proof that they own the property. This can be in the form of a download of the land registry document from here.
https://www.gov.uk/search-property-information-land-registryFor the relationship requirement, you do need your marriage certificate but also proof of a joint life together so a selection of joint; bank statements, utility bills, insurance policies, leases/mortgage documents, tax returns, that sort of thing covering the length of your marriage. You will need 2 or 3 pictures of the two of you together and perhaps a couple of cards you have sent each other.
If you have spent any time apart, you should provide evidence of how you stayed in touch, such as phone records or email history.
Don't forget your letter of sponsorship, a certified copy of your passport, your husband's passport, his previous passports, passport photo. Your payment receipt, IHS receipt, stamped biometrics receipt, priority receipt if you choose to use it and return mailing information.
And of course your printed online application and appendix 2. There may be more that I'm missing, this is just off the top of my head.
Remember also, all documents must be original or a certified copy.
