Hello
Guest

Sponsored Links


Topic: Jealous friend  (Read 958 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

  • *
  • Posts: 72

  • Give me some ribs...
  • Liked: 0
  • Joined: Aug 2003
  • Location: Hong Kong
Jealous friend
« on: January 18, 2006, 09:12:16 AM »
I recently announced to a friend of mine that I'm pregnant.

I expected her to be excited for me (like you'd think most friends would be), but instead she says "I wonder if it will ever be my turn ... i have a horrid feeling that i won't ever get pregnant - and i am 40 - and I am sad."

She did'nt even pretend to be happy for me....all I got was that pityful comment.

Of course later she realized what she'd done/said & then congratulated me. A little to late....she made me feel awful. And of course being hormonal anyway, I got teary over it.

She's only one of two friends I've managed to make here, and I could really have used her well wishes & support since all my family & friends are so far away. She really hurt my feelings. :\\\'(

She talks about getting pregnant, BUT she has'nt seriously been trying to get pregnant...not seriously. We've discussed it. She's only been married a little over a year, and does'nt even know (by her words) when she ovulates.

I know she's just feeling like she's waited to long, on top of the fact that her mother has been pressuring her to have a child since she married.

I'm really at a loss why she would make such a comment following my exciting announcement.

She is very sweet & quite fun to hang out with, but does seem to have alot of emotional up & downs.

She has this tendancy to cancel on me after we've made plans to meet up...always some lame excuse. But I know the bottom line is that it's because of her moods.

Like last week... (2 days after I announced I was pregnant) she cancelled our plans again! She said she'd reschedule with me this week...but I still have'nt heard from her.

So, does it sound like she's just being moody or is she jealous?

Should I confront her & discuss it, or let it go & wait for her to make the next move?







  • *
  • *
  • Posts: 18728

  • Liked: 2
  • Joined: Sep 2003
Re: Jealous friend
« Reply #1 on: January 18, 2006, 09:21:14 AM »
Oh dear Kiki!  I can see why you'd be upset.  To be honest if it was me, I think I'd leave the ball in her court now, especially as she cancelled on you. Maybe she just needs time to get used to you being pregnant.  It may not be that she's jealous, maybe she realises your priorities are changing now which will inevitably change your friendship a bit - maybe that's what she is adjusting to. 


  • *
  • Posts: 72

  • Give me some ribs...
  • Liked: 0
  • Joined: Aug 2003
  • Location: Hong Kong
Re: Jealous friend
« Reply #2 on: January 18, 2006, 11:09:07 AM »
Sure I guess she'll have some adjustments to make ...like I can't grab a drink/smoke with her after work like we used to do.

But I still hope she realizes I want to spend time with her...dinner,shopping,movie whatever.

I hope she does'nt think that just because I'm pregnant I don't want to spend time with her, or that my priorities are completely centered around that...not true.

In fact after the birth I'd like to be able to still ring her up & get together for girls night once a week.

Just wish I understood why'd she's acting this way...


Re: Jealous friend
« Reply #3 on: January 18, 2006, 11:40:28 AM »
I agree w/Britwife.

Dunno.  I *really* wanted to have kids when I hit my 30s, and I certainly wasn't going to wait for my 'turn' to do it!  I was already looking into parenting w/a gay couple, becoming a single parent, etc. 

I think I'd give her some time and not push it.


  • *
  • Posts: 1368

  • AAGGGHH!
  • Liked: 0
  • Joined: Jan 2005
  • Location: Orlando, FL
Re: Jealous friend
« Reply #4 on: January 18, 2006, 01:44:02 PM »
At least she realized her mistake and congratulated you.  Sometimes people speak first and then think later, as we all know.  I'm sure it wasn't intentional to hurt you.  It sounds as though she is confused about her future. 


Sponsored Links





 

coloured_drab