Advice Regarding Significant Other Joining British Army

Hello everyone!

I am new here and was wondering if any one could give me a little bit of advice.   

My boyfriend is going into the British Army in the next few months.  Although he has a degree, he has opted not to go in as an officer.  If he enters as enlisted, he can choose his career (non-combat--linguistics).  Since we have started talking about marriage and my moving to the UK, I am wondering what life is like for the significant other of a member of the British military.  I would love to get some perspective and an idea of what he will deal with and what I can expect.

I am completely supportive of his decision but want to hear some other viewpoints. 

Thanks!!!
Sadb

Hi Sadb,

I'm not sure I can offer you any advice,  my husband is in the Royal Navy  I can say that he is away more then he is home but we make it work for us! (only 4 more years to go!)..  We do have a friend who is the Army and they see to live a happy life usually going from place to place ever 2/3 years.   It's my understanding that they're not usually deployed for longer then 4 months which seems  pretty good to me.

Anyway Welcome!

Maureen

Thanks Maureen!  That is nice to hear that it is workable.  And thank you for the warm welcome!

Regards,
Sadb

Sadb,

It is workable but it's not easy.  If you can survive long distance you can survive the military.  In many ways being married to someone in the military was helpful in adjusting over here because he was not here when I first moved over. I had no one to depend on but myself.  It was difficult and I'll be honest there were more then a couple of time when I felt like throwing in the towel.  But I knew what I was getting into and I knew that his job was a part of the deal. 

However in saying that Dave was in the Navy for years before I met him.   With you, your DB/DF (i'm not sure which he is  ) will be having to adjust to that way of life as well.  So you might have a rockier road then me but if you want to make something work you'll always find a way of coping!   I'm always more then willing to throw in some tips if necessary.

Anyway again welcome and if have any questions I will try to help.

Maureen

It's not easy at all. I wish I had some good advice for you. Im an EX military spouse of ten years.
Best of luck!

Well, he isn't my DF, yet.  I have a feeling that is coming.  Especially since he keeps bringing up the topic!     I had a feeling that it wouldn't be easy, but, I am also lucky that I do have a couple of friends in the country so that might keep me sane during long absences.  And I did live there during part of college, so, that might help a bit too. 

Any tips are most welcome!

Sadb

Best of luck to you in whatever decision you both make.  My DH was in the Navy for five years and there was a stretch he was gone quite a bit (nine months out of one year). I'm not sure how the British Navy works, but here it is a lifestyle all it's own being married to a military person. It is a challenge but then again life is that. Good luck and keep us posted!

sorry, posted twice

My husband and I were both officers in the US Air Force....certainly the services are difficult to compare but life in the military is generally similar.  As both an officer and spouse of an officer, life in a the military can be trying regardless of what branch or what country you're in.  The best advice I have is that "you do what you have to" to make it work.  If it's worth it and you have the will...it's possible.  Not always a piece of cake mind you...especially on the long deployments and especially when children are involved...but, you make it work.    And we've gained some of our greatest friends and seen places that we'd not have gone had we not been in the military.  It's a honor to serve your country...both as the member and the spouse/fiance/significant other.  Kudos to your boyfried for stepping up and to you for supporting him. 

Good luck to the both of you!!!!

And we've gained some of our greatest friends and seen places that we'd not have gone had we not been in the military.  It's a honor to serve your country...both as the member and the spouse/fiance/significant other.  Kudos to your boyfried for stepping up and to you for supporting him. 

Good luck to the both of you!!!!

Thanks for everything that you said!  I think that dealing with the LDR is preparing us for his military career.  And we have done that quite well (but miss each other loads!).   He mentioned that when we start a family, he will gladly walk away if the Army lifestyle in any way negatively impacts the family.  Which is a lovely thing to say.  But, I applaud him for his decision and am rather proud of him!