A Washington , DC airport ticket agent offers some examples of why our
country is in trouble!
1. I had a New Hampshire Congresswoman ask for an aisle seat so that her
hair wouldn't get messed up by being near the window. (On an airplane!)
2. I got a call from a candidate's staffer, who wanted to go to Cape town . I
started to explain the length of the flight and the passport information,
then she i nterrupted me with, "I'm not trying to make you look stupid, but
Cape town is in Massachusetts ." Without trying to make her look stupid, I
calmly explained, "Cape Cod is in Massachusetts , Cape town is in Africa ."Her
response - click.
3. A senior Vermont Congressman called, furious about a Florida package we did. I asked what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando . He said he was
expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to explain that's not possible, since
Orlando is in the middle of the state.
He replied, "Don't lie to me, I looked on the map and Florida is a very
thin state!" (OMG)
4. I got a call from a lawmaker's wife who asked, "Is it possible to see
England from Canada ?" I said, "No." She said, "But they look so close on
the map." (OMG, again!)
5. An aide for a cabinet member once called and asked if he could rent a
car in Dallas . When I pulled up the reservation, I noticed he had only a
1-hour layover in Dallas .
When I asked him why he wanted to rent a car, he said, "I h eard Dallas was
a big airport, and we will need a car to drive between gates to save time."
(Aghhhh)
6. An Illinois Congresswoman called last week. She needed to know how it
was possible that her flight from Detroit left at 8:30 am and got to Chicago
at 8:33 am. I explained that Michigan was an hour ahead of Illinois , but
she couldn't understand the concept of time zones. Finally, I told her the
plane went fast, and she bought that.
7. A New York lawmaker called and asked, "Do airlines put you r physical
description on your bag so they know whose luggage belongs to whom?" I said,
"No, why do you ask?" She replied, "Well, when I checked in with the
airline, they put a tag on my luggage that said (FAT), and I'm overweight.
I think that's very rude!" After putting her on hold for a minute while I
looked into it (I was laughing). I came back and explained the city code
for Fresno , CA is (FAT - Fresno Air Terminal), and the airline was just
putting a destination tag on her luggage.
8. A Senator's aide called to inquire about a trip package to Hawaii . After
going over all the cost info, she asked, "Would it be cheaper to fly to
California , and then take the train to Hawaii ?"
9. I just got off the phone with a freshman Congressman who asked, "How do
I know which plane to get on?" I asked him what exactly he meant, to which
he replied, "I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these planes
have numbers on them."
10. A lady Senator called and said, "I need to fly to Pepsi-Cola , Florida .
Do I have to get on one of those little computer planes?" I asked if she
meant fly to Pensacola , Fl. on a commuter plane. She said, "Yeah, whatever,
smarty!"
11. A senior Senator called and had a question about the documents he
needed in order to fly to China . After a lengthy discussion about
passports, I reminded him that he needed a visa. "Oh, no I don't. I've been
to China many times and never had to have one of those." I double checked
and sure enough, his stay required a visa. When I told him this he said,
"Look, I've been to China four times and every time they have accepted my
American Express!"
12. A New Mexico Congresswoman called to make reservations, "I want to go
from Chicago to Rhino, New York ." I was at a loss for words. Finally, I
said, "Are you sure that's the name of the town?" "Yes, what flights do
you have?" replied the lady. After some searching, I came back with, "I'm
sorry, ma'am, I've looked up every airport code in the country and can't
find a Rhino anywhere." The lady retorted, "Oh, don't be silly! Everyone
knows where it is. Check your map!" So I scoured a map of the state of New
York and finally offered, "You don't mean Buffalo , do you?" The reply?
"Whatever! I knew it was a big animal."
Now you know why the Government is in the shape that it's in!
