Whisper,
Ever hear of the concept that once you put pen to paper (or type on a message board), you've made a statement that you can't take back? And then there's what's going on with Guya and me: For legal reasons, Guya and I have to give hardline advice on this forum. We have to tell you what's right. We can tell you somthing is grey, but we can't tell you what side of grey as we're not paid advisors, this is publicly posted. Keep back-and-forthing with us on an open forum, and all of a sudden your tax situation goes from being a nice grey Schrodinger's cat to single hard outcome; which in your case, isn't a very nice one so far.
This whole thing should be offline with a paid advisor, who can let you know what you really have to do.