High School Graduation/A levels.

Yes, I admit.  Here's something I don't know or it doesn't make sense to me.  We've been here fifteen years, which means that friends of ours are now starting to have kids who are finishing their A-levels and going off to University.  Now, I know that if I were in the states, I would without a thought put some money in a grad card and send it to them, they are kids we've known since they were toddlers, I'm good friends with their parents-but is that done here?  And if it isn't why not?  Is this why more is made over 18th or 21st birthdays?  Does anyone have any experience with this?  Thoughts? 

From my own middle-class upbringing:

I seem to remember the odd phone call, but no cards - and certainly no money - from anyone. I mean, my parents did put their hands in their pockets when I upped and went to university, but as for A-Level results, no way.

Why isn't it done here? No idea. But that's like asking why do we drive on the left! We just do. (There probably is a reason, but meh...lost to the winds of time, or someone remarkably boring with a lot of time on their hands for research...ie, not me!)

It probably is to do with the fact that more is made of the "big" birthdays. In my house, it was the 21st that got the most attention, but that obviously differs from household to household. Plus my family were a bunch of bluff old tradionalists.

I'll have to concur with Big Ridge.  My DF was very shocked to learn of the "tradition" in the State to give money to graduates.  He did, however, say that if there was someone was a little "special" or closer to him he would give them a small gift such as a fancy pen set or the like.

That said, I don't see that there is anything wrong with giving them a nice card and popping a few quid in it so that they can have a pint in celebration.  If someone questions it, simply tell them that it is common to give a bit of cash in the States...after all, what young teen wouldn't be thrilled to see some green (or in this case blue, purple...)

That said, I don't see that there is anything wrong with giving them a nice card and popping a few quid in it so that they can have a pint in celebration.  If someone questions it, simply tell them that it is common to give a bit of cash in the States...after all, what young teen wouldn't be thrilled to see some green (or in this case blue, purple...)

I'll probably do that, but I won't have to explain.     They know me well and are used to me doing things the 'American way'. 

The cards in the shops are a telling sign. I see cards that offer congrats for passing driving tests and completing A-levels. The birthday cards for 18-year-olds all have the same theme: getting drunk (I REFUSE to send one of those to my son on his 18th!*). But as far as money envelopes (like some of the US cards), there don't seem to be many.

I don't know what the rule of thumb is, but it did surprise me that there wasn't much done for "graduation" (the equivalent)...just a card.

*And those cards that offer "Hey, you're 16, you're now legal!" should be banned!

My dad had promised me £10 for every O Level I passed but then I had told him I had probably only passed 1 or 2 so when I got 6 he duly paid up after some grumbling but when it came to my A Levels he didn't make the same bargain. Can't even remember getting anything except a card for my University graduation.

It certainly isn't expected here but you should feel free to send a congrats card and if you want to put some cash or a gift voucher in it then go ahead. I don't think anyone's going to mind!

I asked my husband about this and what happened after his A levels.  He said "Nothing.  I went on holiday and got drunk."

But I think if sending a card seems right to you, why not?  I'm sure your friends won't be offended so it won't do any harm, especially since they know you so well.  They can just add it to their list of "Americanisms" they've grown to love and expect from you!

Amongst my friends, this has become a lively and fun topic of conversation!   

Kellie

*And those cards that offer "Hey, you're 16, you're now legal!" should be banned!

I quite agree.  Had a heck of time finding a card for my son when he turned 16.    No way do I want him thinking that just because the Government says he's "legal" that his mother is saying he's "legal"!!!!