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Topic: How long was the longest stretch of time apart?  (Read 2170 times)

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How long was the longest stretch of time apart?
« on: February 19, 2010, 08:08:58 PM »
Hi,

If some of you remember, I posted that I was going to visit my bf in Manchester this upcoming week, but unfortunately those plans have fallen through.  (consistent with my string of bad luck), and now we have to wait even longer apart. 

I am curious how long was the longest you and your partner went without being able to see/visit each other?  (I am hoping to gain strength from this knowing that pple were apart so long and managed to let love prevail and ended up being together and being happy)

Its been 3 months and now still counting for me and GP.
 :\\\'(


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Re: How long was the longest stretch of time apart?
« Reply #1 on: February 19, 2010, 10:33:17 PM »
Sorry to hear you can't join your bf soon. I know is hard to be positive when everything around you seems to be falling apart, but it is best not to fall apart with everything else. Time will fly by.

Do you guys maintain some type of communication daily?

The longest we have gone without seeing each other has been 3 months. We try to visit each other every 3 months, but it is not always possible. DF just went back to the UK last week. He was here for 3 weeks. Now, we have to wait till June/July until I can come over to Manchester (so that will be 4-5 months). Money and time off from work is running out.

My advice is to try to focus your energy and attention on other activities. Read, work out, yoga, go out with a friend, go watch a movie, volunteer, etc. One thing that this LDR has thought me is to be patient, and that life goes on and he is there and I am here, but that doesn't necessarily means that I can't do and enjoy things that you both enjoy doing, alone; like going to the movies alone or going to a gig alone, etc.
As long as there is love in the relationship and you guys have good and constant communication, have a set goal for the future, things will work out, and time won't be an obstacle.

Big hugs and chin up! Hope you guys can see each other soon.
"When life gives you lemons, squirt the juice in the eyes of your enemies"


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Re: How long was the longest stretch of time apart?
« Reply #2 on: February 19, 2010, 11:04:28 PM »
We were very lucky that our longest stretch apart was probably no more than six weeks...but our LDR seemed to be at a time where we both had lots of time and money (this was about 12 years ago) but it never seemed that bad because our LDR was soooooo much fun, and we both were having lots of fun when we were together, and when we were apart...so we enjoyed ourselves all of the time! I say just try not to dwell on being separate from each other and try to have a good time in your own life, with your friends, doing your own thing!! Thats why our relationship is so successful, imo because we always had fun, together or apart!


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Re: How long was the longest stretch of time apart?
« Reply #3 on: February 20, 2010, 12:31:14 AM »
Do the 13 years from when we first dated, broke up, then got back together count?  ;)

We went seven months between our last visit and our marriage 3.5 years ago.  It was tough, but we didn't really have a choice.  Thank heavens for Skype!


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Re: How long was the longest stretch of time apart?
« Reply #4 on: February 20, 2010, 02:46:59 AM »
Ed and I regularly went 9-10 months without seeing each other as we couldn't afford to visit each other except during his Easter and then my summer vacations! (we were both at Uni at the time we were in an LDR). We managed with googletalk and msn video chats. We are spoiled now, after a little over 4 years of marriage with only a few weeks apart!
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Re: How long was the longest stretch of time apart?
« Reply #5 on: February 20, 2010, 11:46:59 AM »
We got kind of spoiled last year, because I was able to visit roughly every 3 months (which still wasn't enough).  However, due to changes in my job situation, I haven't been there since August, and I won't be able to go anytime soon. 

Our current plan is for my boyfriend to visit in November, so if that happens, it'll have been over a year since our last visit.  If that doesn't happen... well, we'll deal. 

We talk every day, for several hours, via webcam.  It's no replacement, but it does help.  For the past week, though, he's been away staying with family, and has had no internet access, and only sporadic mobile reception.  That's been just about killing us!  I can't wait for him to get back home mid-week.


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Re: How long was the longest stretch of time apart?
« Reply #6 on: February 20, 2010, 01:38:16 PM »
It'll be 5 months tomorrow, for my husband and I. By the time we're together again, it'll be over 6 months. As tough as that has been for me, it has been worse for him, since our baby was only a crawling 10 month-old when he last saw him, and now he's a running toddler. He's watching his son grow on webcam and it's heartbreaking.
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Re: How long was the longest stretch of time apart?
« Reply #7 on: February 20, 2010, 04:15:06 PM »
Ugh two years at one point! It pains me to think about it. One time he tried to visit me and they refused him entry into the US (couldn't prove that he wouldn't overstay) so that complicated things not to mention tons of money wasted.

The struggle made us so much stronger as a couple. We really tend not to sweat the small things and I think we learned to be more secure, confident, and trusting. It's been several years since then. We're married and finally living together in the same place and are still going strong.

So you're not alone in what you're going through! In the end, things just tend to work out, in my experience anyways.
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Re: How long was the longest stretch of time apart?
« Reply #8 on: February 22, 2010, 05:15:34 AM »
Holy crap, I have loads of respect for the couples that have gone years without seeing each other. I think the longest that DB and I have been apart is 3 months.
August 2008: Met on Facebook
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Re: How long was the longest stretch of time apart?
« Reply #9 on: February 22, 2010, 05:37:52 PM »
This is such a good place to get support because so many people can relate to where you are coming from.  Time apart sucks and airport good-byes are even worse.  The longest my husband and I have been apart was 11 months and 3 weeks.  We were dating then.  It was really difficult, but we took it one day at a time, and tried to communicate at least once a day. 
Hang in there, girl. 




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Re: How long was the longest stretch of time apart?
« Reply #10 on: February 22, 2010, 07:12:36 PM »
Time apart sucks and airport good-byes are even worse. 

I agree, airport goodbyes break my heart. When I leave my family I cry buckets and same for when I say goodbye to my husband :(
Met DH to be: 2004
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Re: How long was the longest stretch of time apart?
« Reply #11 on: February 23, 2010, 06:35:00 AM »
Oddly enough, I have no problem leaving the states.  It's only leaving my boyfriend that sends me into near-hysterics.  And it gets worse every time. :(


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Re: How long was the longest stretch of time apart?
« Reply #12 on: February 23, 2010, 09:44:22 AM »
Oddly enough, I have no problem leaving the states.  It's only leaving my boyfriend that sends me into near-hysterics.  And it gets worse every time. :(

When we were just dating I was the same. Wasn't upset at all saying goodbye to my family. After we got married and living in the UK became very real, I started to get really emotional because I knew I would only see my family about once a year.
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Re: How long was the longest stretch of time apart?
« Reply #13 on: February 25, 2010, 04:12:35 PM »
When DH and I were still across the pond from each other, we had at least one time where we were separated for about 2  years. That was from 2003-2005.

He proposed in 2006, and it still took me 3 years to get over to the UK in 2009. Money drama kept us apart. We emailed every day, and chatted when we were able to, and Skype'd on my old room mate's laptop, every Saturday. Or, we'd phone. I'd have to wake up either at 5am or 6am to either speak to him on the phone or on Skype, but, it was always worth it. Now that we're finally together, we just appreciate each other so much more.

Good luck with everything!
Amor Vinicit Omnia=Love Conquers All.


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Re: How long was the longest stretch of time apart?
« Reply #14 on: March 17, 2010, 10:19:19 AM »
On average we probably saw each other every 3 to 4 months while we were dating. He was in Ohio and I here in the UK. We LDR'd for about 3 1/2 years. The longest stretch we went without seeing each other was 6 months. I think that happened twice, the worst was the last one, we got engaged (in Spain!) June 2007 and he moved here (the UK) in December 2007. Longest 6 months of my life, we spoke on the phone every day (VOIP is a wonderful thing!) but it wasn't enough. However we were married in March 2008 and are blissfully happy. It IS worth it, hang in there  ;D


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