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Topic: cutting the umbilical cord....  (Read 1677 times)

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cutting the umbilical cord....
« on: July 06, 2010, 03:59:27 AM »
Ok, so let me start by stating that I'm a total mommas girl. She is my everything. My best friend, my mentor and the one person that truly makes the world go round.

Now that I have my family permit and I'm about to move, the reality is sinking in. I have realized that I didn't prepare myself for goodbyes. I feel guilty, like I should spend every single moment with her because I'll miss so much time when I'm gone. Sometimes I worry myself too much and I think that something could happen to her and I won't be there. Maybe age plays a part, I'm only 22. Every time I think about it, I cry. Silly me. This sort of thing is natural, I know. I'm just curious if anyone has felt this and what they did to feel better.   :-\\\\


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Re: cutting the umbilical cord....
« Reply #1 on: July 06, 2010, 09:37:37 AM »
I cried for about 2 days before I left.  I had been so busy preparing for the move up until that point, that I hadn't really allowed it to sink in that I was leaving my entire family behind.  I even called DH and told him I didn't think I could go through with it because I was just going to miss everyone too much.  It was pretty bad but I was fine once I actually got on the airplane.

I do miss my family a lot...but we keep in touch regularly and we have the ability to see each other several times a year.  It's not the same...but it's not as bad as I thought it would be.


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Re: cutting the umbilical cord....
« Reply #2 on: July 06, 2010, 09:49:29 AM »
I have a strange relationship with my mother, while I too feel like I am a Mommas girl, we don't always get along. For me, the relationship is still really strong and I think its because I am far away! We talk everyday, sometimes 2-3 times a day, and I still feel close! I think its all a state of mind really!  We see each other maybe 4 times a year, and its always a good experience! So keep your chin up!


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Re: cutting the umbilical cord....
« Reply #3 on: July 06, 2010, 10:00:01 AM »
I actually talk to my mom more now that I have moved. I can't say for sure why, but I used to only call her a few times a month and now I call her once or twice a week at least! Also, we use Skype from time to time (I also do this with my best friend, who is still one of the most important people in my life). I don't have the money to visit them nearly as often as I would like to, but we definitely stay in touch and it's been ok so far. Leaving your family is a very emotional experience, and you will miss them, but you there are so many ways to stay in touch now that they don't have to feel so far away.  :)


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Re: cutting the umbilical cord....
« Reply #4 on: July 06, 2010, 07:42:51 PM »
I know that once I'm there everything will be fine, but the plane ride will definitely be bitter-sweet. Thank God for skype!! I'm also having to leave my cat behind which hurts a bit. Luckily she will be with my mom. Thanks for the support guys  :)

Mr. Lonely


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Re: cutting the umbilical cord....
« Reply #5 on: July 06, 2010, 08:26:55 PM »
I have found that distance actually helps me be closer to my family. I talk to my older sister and mother almost daily on google chat (i have it on my phone so they can get me anytime, anyplace.)  My sister lived in Alaska for years and we found that we got along much better miles apart and am very close to her.  I do miss out on talking to my father, but he isn't a phone person nor does he chat; emails are not good because I'm horrible at responding to email since I do it all day at work. 

I rarely call my family and if I do call to say hello my father assumes something is wrong.  He paniced when I called for his birthday!

On the other side of things, moving has ruined my relationship with my oldest sister.  We don't phone, don't email, and don't chat. My nephew had major surgery last year and I wasn't told (found out on facebook...)  It's fine and I don't cry anymore about it, especially after my older sister has been given the same treatment since moving the same distance from her, but it did hurt right after I moved.

I also left my cat.  She was living with a former co-worker, but they stopped answering my emails.  I'm glad yours will be with your mom.


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Re: cutting the umbilical cord....
« Reply #6 on: July 07, 2010, 12:07:24 AM »
I have found that distance actually helps me be closer to my family. I talk to my older sister and mother almost daily on google chat (i have it on my phone so they can get me anytime, anyplace.)  My sister lived in Alaska for years and we found that we got along much better miles apart and am very close to her.  I do miss out on talking to my father, but he isn't a phone person nor does he chat; emails are not good because I'm horrible at responding to email since I do it all day at work. 

I rarely call my family and if I do call to say hello my father assumes something is wrong.  He paniced when I called for his birthday!

On the other side of things, moving has ruined my relationship with my oldest sister.  We don't phone, don't email, and don't chat. My nephew had major surgery last year and I wasn't told (found out on facebook...)  It's fine and I don't cry anymore about it, especially after my older sister has been given the same treatment since moving the same distance from her, but it did hurt right after I moved.

I also left my cat.  She was living with a former co-worker, but they stopped answering my emails.  I'm glad yours will be with your mom.


I'm trying to be optimistic about the whole ordeal of leaving my family behind. I think your right about the distance being a blessing in disguise. I will probably appreciate the phone calls and chats a lot more than I did before. My step-father and I have never really got along until now. He's real stubborn and private, but now that I'm leaving he's been a lot more talkative and has shown that he really cares about me. I feel really lucky to have my family behind me 110%. I've read some posts about disapproving families and I can't imagine having to feel that way for a move.

I'm sorry to hear about your older sister. Maybe she could come for a visit? Rekindle the relationship? It's hard enough as it is to be so far away. You guys shouldn't lose touch!
-Best wishes!


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Re: cutting the umbilical cord....
« Reply #7 on: July 07, 2010, 08:53:06 AM »
Incidentally, which part of Dallas do you live in, Miss Jenn? I'm from there, too. Grew up in Mesquite and that is where my parents live, but I lived near Addison before I moved here.  :)


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Re: cutting the umbilical cord....
« Reply #8 on: July 07, 2010, 10:45:49 PM »
Incidentally, which part of Dallas do you live in, Miss Jenn? I'm from there, too. Grew up in Mesquite and that is where my parents live, but I lived near Addison before I moved here.  :)

I'm actually from San Antonio but I moved around a bit and ended up moving to Arlington in 96'. My ex was from Carrolton! So we spent a lot of time in Addison :) They have a better selection of restaurants! Love Addison!


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Re: cutting the umbilical cord....
« Reply #9 on: July 08, 2010, 01:36:27 PM »
I'm actually from San Antonio but I moved around a bit and ended up moving to Arlington in 96'. My ex was from Carrolton! So we spent a lot of time in Addison :) They have a better selection of restaurants! Love Addison!

I worked at Houstons in Addison for a bit, then at Chamberlain's Fish Market Grill just before moving here. It was a good part of town, but my heart was always in Lakewood.  :)


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Re: cutting the umbilical cord....
« Reply #10 on: July 08, 2010, 06:54:43 PM »
I was on the opposite side of your situation. My youngest daughter and I are, and always have been, very close and it was tough for me to move to England without her.

When the move occurred we just decided that we weren't going to cut the umbilical cord, we were just going to stretch it a lot.   ;)

We talk every other day for at least 30 minutes and she comes over when on break from UCF. Last summer she stayed for 3 months and is coming back for Christmas break this year. In between her visits I usually visit her at least once.

She's still momma's girl and always will be. I'm sure your mom feels the same.


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