Love from a long distance is hard... how do you manage?

You guys are great and thank you for your advice....

My DH and I are a bit different.  We never had an LDR when dating but we are moving to the US and because of timings with jobs and immigration, we find ourselves in an LDR for the next couple of months.

The things keeping us sane:

-video skype
-lots of chit chatty emails - we try to talk about the mundane and little things, as it keeps us involved in the day to day
- pics of silly things and goings on, like our new flat as I am unpacking
- definitely living life - going out with friends, seeing new things, etc.
- keeping busy -DH in particular is doing tons of travel with work
- shopping and other creature comforts - there is something to be said for treating yourself when you are down.

Hi All,

I think what makes the LDR so much harder is the slimy guys that are still in her life what i mean by that is guys that are obbessed, want to get in her underwear or have a past with her..... now i trust her with all of my heart but being 5360 miles away and seeing some of the things they write and hear some of the things they say just hurts and to be honest actually makes me insecure..... as most of them dont like the fact that we're together and make that fact very clear

now i know it cant only be me that has been through this situation but even if you havent could anyone give me advice on what they would do because some days its great but then others when you find out she has gone for lunch with one of them and he was basically asking questions and saying but he didnt do as much for you as i have and making up names then it starts to hurt....

she doesnt seem to see the problem with it either which is probably because she likes to make everyone happy but by making others happy is making me upset but she seems to think im overeacting

so once again any advice would be great
thanks guys

Advice is simple: Get married and either your move to the U.S., or she moves the U.K. Or you can play the flying back and forth thing forever.

And no, I've seen it before, you're not over-reacting, what you are seeing is big trouble ahead. Why is she even bothering communicating with these "slimy guys?" It's obvious there is still something going on.

Be very careful.

Advice is simple: Get married and either your move to the U.S., or she moves the U.K. Or you can play the flying back and forth thing forever.

And no, I've seen it before, you're not over-reacting, what you are seeing is big trouble ahead. Why is she even bothering communicating with these "slimy guys?" It's obvious there is still something going on.

Be very careful.

If you've got trust issues, you need to work them through. There is no crime in having lunch with friends, even if those friends have more than friendly feelings. That's their problem as I'm sure they already know she's leaving to live in England because of her present relationship. The fact that his girl friend is telling him about what she's doing means she's an honest and open person. If she wanted to cheat, she could have and there's no way that Brit-in-love would know anyways.

I've known some controlling people in my life. First it's that particular friend they don't want you to go out to lunch with then no male friends what so ever, then it's no going out period!

I think you may have had some bad experiences but not everyone's the same. It's okay to socialize!

Why is she even bothering communicating with these "slimy guys?" It's obvious there is still something going on.

Actually there's nothing going on.. I'm completely honest and faithful with my boyfriend. But thank you for assuming the worst! The people I choose to have in my life are my choice and only if I feel they're crossing boundaries they shouldn't that's when I'll cut people out of my life.

LMS, if you want to quote someone's post, there is a link at the top right of every post that says 'quote' that will take the whole comment and place it into the reply box. If you don't want to use the whole post, just delete the bits you don't want.

Why is she even bothering communicating with these "slimy guys?" It's obvious there is still something going on.

Actually there's nothing going on.. I'm completely honest and faithful with my boyfriend. But thank you for assuming the worst! The people I choose to have in my life are my choice and only if I feel they're crossing boundaries they shouldn't that's when I'll cut people out of my life.

Don't mean to cause distress...it's my super-neurotic nature to assume the worst and hope for the best....and almost 99% of the time that means I get massive relief : )

LMS, if you want to quote someone's post, there is a link at the top right of every post that says 'quote' that will take the whole comment and place it into the reply box. If you don't want to use the whole post, just delete the bits you don't want.

Oh thanks will do

Don't mean to cause distress...it's my super-neurotic nature to assume the worst and hope for the best....and almost 99% of the time that means I get massive relief : )

I was going to say that's pretty harsh judgement to pass on someone just because of what their partner posted on an internet forum...

I think it's very easy to get jealous in an LDR, mostly because others are able to hang out with your SO while you can't.  But ultimately, it is better for the both of you if you are out socializing and not sitting around, depressed and pining.