Friendliest parts of the UK?

I've been keeping an eye on these forums for a while but this is my first post.  Let me start by saying this is a great resource and it has really given me pause for thought about bringing my American wife and child back to the UK, where I am from.  I tend to view the UK with rose-tinted spectacles and the airing cupboard has reminded me that a move back to the UK will involve a bit of culture shock for my wife.

My wife is very friendly and sweet, and one of my concerns is that she might find people in the UK a bit cold.  We're in the early stages of discussing a move back to the UK and we have a bit of freedom about where we move to.  Does anyone have any suggestions of the friendlier parts of the UK?  We're leaning towards Scotland (where I am from) or Northern England.  I'm interested in Tyneside but am open to hearing any thoughts or opinions about any areas where a cheerful (American) Southerner would fit in well.

Thanks!

Hi,

There's no real substantial answer to this, it'll all be anecdotal findings by people from all parts of the UK. Some will say the North is friendlier than the South which I can understand as I've experienced what appears to be friendlier interactions with strangers a few times. I've also had similar amounts of similar and just as friendly interactions with people in the South too.

Saying that though, I've always found the USA to be much friendlier than the UK!

What you'll get in any subsequent responses is the same as what I've said, sort of similar, sort of different and completely the opposite as well!

What I will say is don't base your choice of where to live in the UK with this as your top priority. I'd even say that it's something that should be significantly lower in your list of requirements and priorities.

The UK has a potentially 'bumpy' course ahead of it in the next few years - ecomomic issues and an upcoming referendum and possible reactions from these could cause significant 'volatility' and that means things could go negatively on the whole. Look at your situation and ensure your livelihood, job(s) or your business can weather any issues in this regard.

I know plenty of others may disagree with the above which is fine, only you and your wife will know your own personal situation for a long term or permanent move to the UK.

Perhaps look into getting and being approve for all of you to have Dual Nationality so that if you do decide to stay in the US for now, you could make a move later and vice versa.

Cheers, DtM! West London & Slough UK!

'Friendly' isn't as straight-forward as it seems.  And it's only part of the equation.

I'm from the Midwest (where we're pathologically nice), and have been living in the Western Isles for 5 years now.  People are very friendly, on a casual level.  There are dozens of people that will say hello to me, have a chat with me in the shop, etc, and I've got friendly relationships with several colleagues.  But there are only maybe a handful of people here (all over aged 65, and long-time friends of my husband's family) who I would say have actually shown any real interest in getting to know me.  And it's the same for my MIL, who's only from one of the other islands, and has lived here 43 years.

So, on the one hand, the casual friendliness and courtesy is much the same as I'm used to.  But on the other, it's still exceptionally lonely.  And, of course, there's the downside to that casual, small-town friendliness: gossip, judgement and zero privacy.

The other thing to consider is what interests/activities/lifestyle your wife enjoys.  It's always harder to make friends as an adult, but one of the best ways to do it is by getting involved in some activity; a yoga class, a church choir, community theatre, a running club, etc.  For me, none of those things has been an option, because activities that interest me are nearly non-existent.

I've struggled to make this work, but recently had to admit that it's just not.  The islands are simply not a healthy place for me,  or my husband (and he's a native!).  Fortunately, we're going to be moving to Inverness soon, and I'm really hopeful that it'll be a better fit for us.  Still small enough to be relatively friendly, and low-stress, but big enough to offer a variety of activities and opportunities, which we can enjoy in anonymity.

So while I would say that, in the broadest of terms, the friendliest places in Britain are north of the Central Belt (or, at least, north of Hadrian's Wall), your wife's mileage may vary considerably, depending on who she is, what she enjoys, and what's important to her.  And, the problem is, she might not be entirely aware of those things until after she's here.

Bottom line:  take stock of what you/she really enjoy and value about your current life.  Make your best guess.  Then, be prepared to find out that you were wrong, and to move on and try somewhere new.

I'm from the South (Charleston, which has been vote "friendliest" on a lot of occasions) and I now live in Cardiff. I have had a good experience here. I work in a shop at the moment and most people are up for a bit of a chat and smile and say hello. the topic of conversation is often focuses on my accent/why I'm there (and my response being "I married a Welshman" always gets a friendly response), but it's nice to have a built in small talk topic by being American. I haven't found London to be excessively unfriendly, but I imagine that really anywhere outside of the southeast/very large cities will be an easier transition for your wife. Cardiff has been a great mix of the social/shopping opportunities of a big city while still feeling relatively small. A big bonus for me is the cost of living being low  enough here to live within a 10 minute walk of the city centre.
I have visited west Wales as well and found it to be very friendly too. Nice small towns without the hustle and bustle and crowds that we get in Cardiff for big events.



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 Do you have an enthusiastic buy in from your wife?  If not, think long and hard before moving.  If it's your idea only, then all that anger and frustration we all occasionally feel when trying to fit in might get aimed at you!

How about a third country like me and my wife did?  Prague? Spain / Gibraltar?  Then you guys can be culture shocked together


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I'm in the Southeast and it took several years before I made some genuine friends.  People have always been friendly... just a bit harder to break through the surface to create a true friendship bond.  Having a child here has DEFINITELY helped, though I would not recommend someone have a child just to make friends.   

Fortunately, we're going to be moving to Inverness soon, and I'm really hopeful that it'll be a better fit for us.  Still small enough to be relatively friendly, and low-stress, but big enough to offer a variety of activities and opportunities, which we can enjoy in anonymity.

Well, hey!! As you know, I sure love it over this way. I have always found the people very friendly since I moved here 8 years ago and I've made some really great friends.   There's definitely a nice mix of things to get yourself involved with (especially if the stuff you're into is any of the stuff you posted like yoga classes, church choirs, community theatre, running clubs....)  and pubs and restaurants are getting better too on the night life end.  Not to mention more shops and easier transportation links.     I know you've struggled with the Western Isles for a wide variety of reasons listed in all your past posts, but I really hope that moving over this way will be a great move for you and that you enjoy it.   

Hopefully a late reply is better than no reply, but I thought I'd have some good advice given that I live in Newcastle! My husband and I are both from Kentucky and I was pretty worried about the friendliness aspect, as I'm generally a very open and talkative person. I have found Newcastle to be really friendly - not by American standards, but I do have several good friends. Like KFdancer said, having a child has been key to that (all my friends are fellow moms and their husbands), so I don't know how things might be different if I didn't have a child.

That being said, even after nearly two years here, I find that there's still a bit of a wall with most of my friends about talking about serious/deeper/personal topics, and I worry about being seen as over the top (for example, they apologize when they mention having menstrual cramps and I'm thinking "You must think I'm the biggest oversharer in the world if cramps are pushing the envelope!"). I miss my close friendships back home, but I'm not especially lonely here.