Why did you come to the UK?

I'm a bit late to this party but I was on holiday. 

The company I worked for in the US sponsored a 5 year work permit for me in 2006, and at the time I agreed to stay a minimum of 2-3 years. But I immediately felt very much at home in London, and in many ways, much more comfortable than I ever felt in the US. I'm a fairly private person, and I prefer the way people don't ask you a lot of personal questions in the first 30 seconds. I like the fair mindedness of brits, the acceptance of personality quirks and the dry sense of humour. I like being able to travel to Europe for the weekend. I love the cosmopolitan feel to London and meeting people from every part of the world. I prefer that religion is more low key here and that no one asks you what church you go to. Weather comes and weather goes. Whatever.

Of course there are things that I miss about the US, but I honestly have no intention of ever moving back. I have had a few days of feeling minor homesickness for my family, but that did not happen until I was here for 4 years, and even then it was over very quickly. My application for naturalisation in in the pipeline, and I will soon be both American and British and that is truly what I have become. A bit of both and very comfortable with that.

Your friend is out of line IMHO and I'm glad to hear that you are sticking up for yourself.

Hiya,
I came over here to Scotland in 1999 on a work permit.. No relationship was in the air at all. Came over all by myself to work and see what the culture etc was really like on a day to day basis..
For me it was my heritage that sparked the interest in Scotland. My gran was born here in Scotland and had gone to Massachusetts as a young person and instilled the love of her country of birth and the culture in us .. I was the grandchild that took it the farthest.

My story is a bit like Kaylesh’s- My grandfather was Scottish (and I’m also originally from Massachusetts) so it had an allure to me which I couldn’t quite explain.  But I had even never been here before I scored a job interview, and actually before moving here permanently, I spent oh about 28 hours in total in Scotland, in which about 8 of those hours were sleeping and about 7 of those hours were spent in a job interview.  

I kept applying for jobs in Europe (all over) and then one day I actually got a call back for one.  The timing was perfect. I had just ended a 6 year relationship (that most definitely needed to end!)  My ex moved out, I was living in South Florida (family in Mass.), several of my friends had moved away themselves and I was feeling quite alone really.  So I was really ready for a change.   I got my work permit two months after I got the job and here I was!

I jumped in head first.  Tell you what, I LOVED it here the moment I moved.  It was January 3rd, the pavements were coated in ice.  It was dark at 2 pm.  Everyone in Scotland was still hung over from all the Hogmanay celebrations and it was super quiet.  All the Christmas lights were still up.  It would be probably quite a desolate feeling for someone who just moved to the other side of the world by herself, but I thought it was beautiful.      

Within a few weeks, I had more friends in Scotland than I had ever had in South Florida.  I’ve gotten myself into so many amazing and wonderful things.   I love all the music I play, the garden I dig, the stuff I do for Diabetes charities, the STEM charity work I do, the random things I get myself into- like recording at Abbey Road studios would have never even been a possibility for me if I were living elsewhere.  

Sure the weather can be absolutely appalling sometimes, but regardless of the weather, there is nothing more breathtaking than the Highlands.   My older sister came to visit this year and she went ‘No wonder you live here!!!!’

So yeah, I should, all things going to plan, get my ILR at the end of this year.   Then will wait my year for Citizenship and save up the dosh for that.  And then who knows where life will take me.  But I know that the Highlands call to me and always will.      

I agree, your friend is probably jealous, or she's truly confused as to why anyone would not want to live in the US. I  know of people who think leaving the US to live elsewhere is blashphemy!   

PB, do you (and Kaylesh) ever think that there is some inborn instinctive affinity for the country of your ancestry? When I first visited the British Isles as a tourist, I loved England and Scotland of course, but when I got to Northern Ireland and visited my mother's cousin I felt like wow, this is home! I don't remember my grandmother at all and never met any of the cousins before -- but somehow it felt like it was where I should be. I even picked up the accent in only about 4 days (whereas even after 20 years in Yorkshire I have no ear for that accent)
Just wondering what experiences others have had.

PB, do you (and Kaylesh) ever think that there is some inborn instinctive affinity for the country of your ancestry? When I first visited the British Isles as a tourist, I loved England and Scotland of course, but when I got to Northern Ireland and visited my mother's cousin I felt like wow, this is home! I don't remember my grandmother at all and never met any of the cousins before -- but somehow it felt like it was where I should be. I even picked up the accent in only about 4 days (whereas even after 20 years in Yorkshire I have no ear for that accent)
Just wondering what experiences others have had.

I felt like that in the Netherlands!    And I think I *get* Yorkshire & the northeast in general - often wondering if that's owing to my Viking roots & a lot of them moved here back in the olden days.  I'm sure it's all just between my ears though!

I never had it in my head in the slightest that I'd ever move to England - never even conceived the idea.  Then I met an English guy...yadda yadda yadda...and now I've been here 8 years.

I *for sure* didn't move here for the weather & it is often a source of my discontent, as I was quite happy with my last US location in Tampa Bay - 360 days of sunshine a year...sigh.  If the financials & the opportunity were there - I'd move to southern Spain in a heartbeat!

Apart from the weather, I'm quite happy with my lot.  Love the NHS, having lots of annual leave time, more opportunities to travel all around Europe etc...probably a lot of things others have said.  But OMG, not the weather & not the dark days of winter -- I have a tendency towards SAD and so those things trouble me the most - plus considering what weather I left behind.

I love our long days just now though! 

PB, do you (and Kaylesh) ever think that there is some inborn instinctive affinity for the country of your ancestry? When I first visited the British Isles as a tourist, I loved England and Scotland of course, but when I got to Northern Ireland and visited my mother's cousin I felt like wow, this is home! I don't remember my grandmother at all and never met any of the cousins before -- but somehow it felt like it was where I should be. I even picked up the accent in only about 4 days (whereas even after 20 years in Yorkshire I have no ear for that accent)
Just wondering what experiences others have had.

That is an interesting question, but for me I'd have to say no.  My grandparents and great-grandparents were Eastern European Jews from Poland and Russia.  I have very little desire to visit there and almost no desire to visit Israel (where us Jews would have come from originally).

Although, who knows how I'd feel if I actually found myself in those places and experienced them first-hand?  However, I believe life was very hard in Eastern Europe for Jews (not to mention the Holocaust!) and maybe those troubles are written in my DNA, hence no desire to go there.

I did fall in love with Cornwall though (West Penwith area--where chary lives!) from the first time I visited.  I've visited many times since (though sadly, not recently!  )

I'm not shy to say I believe in past lives and maybe that has something to do with it?  I don't get preoccupied with trying to figure out past life stuff, just something I feel to be true.

I'm not sure BD.  Could be. But I also just grew up hearing my Grandfather's (Mom's Father) stories of his childhood in West Lothian and he would tell his stories and tales and the music, he listened to, and the folk music and tunes that we learned to play from him, I think the music pulled me more than anything. 

On the other end, my Nana (Dad's Mom) would tell me stories about growing up in the Dust Bowl in Oklahoma in the Great Depression. That certainly didn't have any pull for me 

I believe in past lives too Andee 

West Lothian and he would tell his stories and tales and the music, he listened to, and the folk music and tunes that we learned to play from him, I think the music pulled me more than anything. 

I can really relate to the pull of music!

I believe in past lives too Andee 

PB, do you (and Kaylesh) ever think that there is some inborn instinctive affinity for the country of your ancestry?

Yes. My dad's from Mexico and while I would never live there, I will always have a very soft spot for it. We're even going on holiday there next month! We're going to the Mayan Riviera (a part of the country I've never been to because my Mexican relatives live in the north by the US border) but I told my husband it felt a bit like visiting home, in a way.

I think, for me, I just have a desire to go pretty much any and everywhere. Opportunity presents itself, I take it! I had backpacked through Europe and then saw a way to spend more time there and get an even better perspective on life and how the world works and all that. That's what my move was. That's my reasoning for anything I do, really. I like to put myself in unfamiliar situations because I feel I grow and learn so much from those types of experiences.

You were lucky to have your Grandfather around to introduce you to those tales and songs, PB.  Maybe that's why I felt drawn to Norn Iron -- because I didn't have my grandma or grandpa when I was growing up (my mother's father died when she was only 5 and her mother died when I was about 1 1/2) There were my mother's uncles who always fascinated me -- little wiry guys with full heads of white hair! Uncle Tommy (who went back to the old country) even showed me where my grandmother (and the rest of them) had been born.

And yeah, maybe there's an element of past lives too.

Maybe that's why I felt drawn to Norn Iron -- because I didn't have my grandma or grandpa when I was growing up (my mother's father died when she was only 5 and her mother died when I was about 1 1/2)

That could very well be part of it!

I think, for me, I just have a desire to go pretty much any and everywhere. Opportunity presents itself, I take it! I had backpacked through Europe and then saw a way to spend more time there and get an even better perspective on life and how the world works and all that. That's what my move was. That's my reasoning for anything I do, really. I like to put myself in unfamiliar situations because I feel I grow and learn so much from those types of experiences.

That's a fantastic attitude / philosophy!

That's a fantastic attitude / philosophy!

 

The main reason I moved to the UK was to not seperate my husband from his daughters (There's a really tough relationship there anyways because of the parent dynamics that their mom escalates it to...Long story! But we were trying to keep intact the small, but holding thread that was there anywas and the fact that it upset the girls to know he might move was a positive step forward!) So, in some respects, I did move here for love, but more so for family togetherness. It's really important for me that my husband was there for his daughters and me moving here has really allowed him to better grow his relationship with them. I think if not children were involved though, he would have moved to the U.S.

But saying that, I LOVE it here! My parents were really skeptic as to why I liked it here and they came and visited a few weeks back (in fact, just left!) and before they went, had told me that they could COMPLETELY understand why someone would fall in love with the country! They loved the food, the history, beautiful country side, the friendliness of people in my area, etc. They said that there was a certain "spirit about the place and culture and people" (if that makes since!) I'm in total agreement!

In the U.S. (where I lived) it's all about living to work and where I live now it's about working to live and enjoying and appreciating the life you have got! I REALLY like that! I don't feel so overwhelmed and stressed anymore and my quality of life and health has improved so much more because of it! I love all the holidays I get and vacation time! They don't harrass me when I want to take vacation time! (My past employers would get soo upset that I take my vacation time, and even worse, if I take the whole 2 weeks at once!)

And seriously, let's talk about how awesome and affordable the wine is here!