I absolutely agree that you got unlucky with that first instructor. A few years ago, I had an introductory lesson with an instructor in the Salisbury area. I knew I was going to be fine with further tuition, but I also knew I didn't want to work with that instructor anymore. We did not gel. Then I put off learning for the test until after we moved (which took a few more years than expected, so I went a long time not driving in the UK!). The instructor I found after the move was perfect for me. Laid back enough to feel understanding, but knowledgeable enough to teach me what I needed to know for the test.
As for driving a manual, I learned in the US when my older sister got a truck and then joined the Army and left it behind (free "car"!). It took a bit of practice on my family's land, far away from everybody and everything, but I soon got the hang of it. Before she left, my sister took me out to the land and stopped the truck at the bottom of a steep dip in our driveway; my job was to get the truck up from there to the flat part of the land. She said if I could do that, I could drive a manual. She wasn't right about much, but she was right about that. I definitely got the feel for it that day.