Services for a child with Aspergers, possibly bipolar

Good luck with it all.
Sometimes you just have to do what you have to do.  I hope it all works out for you.

Good luck with it all.
Sometimes you just have to do what you have to do.  I hope it all works out for you.

Thank you Nan.  With something so little understood, that rules your entire life like this, it's always super hard to know the right thing to do.  I don't know what the right thing to do is, but I do know that we have to take care of us, too. And the other kids.  I have to do what's best for all of us. Right now, we have to put on our own masks. My husband never adjusted to life in the US.

What happens with her will not be made/broken by our location.  We have a happy, stable home and considerable financial privilege to seek any help we need.  Plus lots of social capitol and family support on both sides of the pond. That will not change. None of the things that really matter will change.

I have been off the forum since a reply in this post told me basically that I was cruel to move my child overseas.  It goes to show your words DO matter.  I was struggling, and trying to work out some anxieties I was having about aspects of her care and the transition, and I was told I was harming her, which I understand but still it was enough to send me packing from here.  I have been afraid to post more on this forum since then.

And it has probably been detrimental to my moving plans, has caused stress for myself and my spouse, and helped absolutely no one. Be kind, people.  You never know the whole story.

Anyway: Update.  We got her diagnosis.  Currently, at age 11, the doctor believes she has Autism (currently called Autism level 1) and Generalized Anxiety.  Since summer and not having to get her out of bed or make speedy transitions, things have been easier but not perfect.  I plan to get her back into regular therapy and to start her on Zoloft per her old therapist's recommendation (my mother has taken it for years and it has helped a LOT).

I still believe this could morph into bipolar, as it runs heavily in my family and her behavior can be SO EXTREME, but for now I'm just going with it.

Thank you all for your helpful comments and links etc. I'm back at it now, and back on here.  I just had to process  and get some space and perspective, I guess.  Of COURSE it will be hard to move.  For all of us.  But it remains the right thing to do.  We are certain.

Further, not even considering all the other things, my husband has been living here in a foreign country for 15 years.  It's his turn to be 'home'.

I’m sorry you were put at a previous post.  Your scenario was a trigger for that member who moved to the UK as an informed adult with autism and she’s not happy.  Your opinion triggered her, which in turn triggered you.  No one is right, no one is wrong. 

If your husband wants to be home, of course that is valid.  The two of you have weighed that up with the children’s needs and have decided this is what’s best for your family.  Nothing wrong with that.

I’m so pleased your child has found her solution.  I would recommend having her doctor ensure that the medication she takes is (a) available in the UK (b) prescribed to kids (c) not using it “off label”.

What I mean by off label is when a medication is “cleared for use as one thing but used for another”.  It’s one frustrating aspect of the NHS, the med MUST be cleared for the condition, regardless of the past history of it being effective.  The NHS also will usually give each condition a “first choice medication”. You can go to the GP with a recurring back spasm.  You may have as success in the USA with drug d, but you have to try drug a, b, and c first.  Who am I kidding, a back spasm they will say to have a warm bath. 

I’m sure you know all of this from your husband, but it’s valuable for those who look through posts.

I’m sure you know all of this from your husband, but it’s valuable for those who look through posts.

Lol one would think, but alas due to his having a pretty severe communication disorder he didn't really advocate for himself, so if he ever had to take a medicine, he probably just tried the first one and said 'medicine doesn't work for me' and quit.  When I got my hands on him and realized he wasn't breathing in his sleep half the time, I got him to an allergist and addressed his severe chronic allergies.  It's been a long road, but we FINALLY figured out they were primarily being triggered by celiac and he quit gluten etc and has been one million times better.  Still allergic, but normal person allergic, not 'the most allergic person I have ever met' (as quoted by no fewer than 4 different allergists).

In other words, thank you!  This information is really helpful.  I am 99.9% certain that Zoloft is available there and primarily prescribed for Anxiety, but I will check.

Here’s the NHS guide to treating anxiety in kids

https://eput.nhs.uk/wp-content/uploads/2014/03/Section-12-Drug-Use-in-Children-Adolescents-updated-Nov-2016.pdf

I am 99.9% certain that Zoloft is available there and primarily prescribed for Anxiety, but I will check.

Zoloft is available here (as sertraline).  It's mainly prescribed for depression, panic/anxiety disorders, and OCD. It can be prescribed for other conditions (e.g. as a REM suppressant for a sleep disorder) but that's usually done by a specialist (not a GP). 

Zoloft is available here (as sertraline).  It's mainly prescribed for depression, panic/anxiety disorders, and OCD. It can be prescribed for other conditions (e.g. as a REM suppressant for a sleep disorder) but that's usually done by a specialist (not a GP).

Perfect.  That is so helpful!  My mother has successfully taken it for a very long time, so I feel certain that it will help her some at least, being the one that is the most like my side of the family.  We are going to start there, at least, and get her into more therapy and starting with the school year we will be hiring someone to help us in the mornings with her (a family member who has extensive experience working with autistic children, who also needs a part time job).