Your British Peers

I've not made many (hardly any really) Brit friends yet, but then I don't get out much.   Being an 'old married' 40-something, no kids.  However, I've just started my first 'real' permanent job here, so we'll see if I meet some folks through work perhaps.  I don't know if it'll make a difference either way, but most of the people on my 'team' at work (so far) are very young, 20-somethings, fresh out of univ (if they went at all), unmarried with no kids.   The few friends I've made over here so far are either friends of my husband, or other Brit/American couples locally I've met through UKY.

Hey Carolyn,

I have found meeting people to be easy, but finding people worth spending time with to be difficult. I hope you are successful and your job helps you out.

Don't know if you have tried or if this is something you're interested in, but couple (walking) holidays can be a blast. There's a couple we have made several trips with, and they always end up the same. Walk around the countryside for an hour.... whee!, there's a pub! Walk around some more.... whee! another pub. Ruined castle and fudge shop owned by elderly lady who smells a little funny, and guess what? Another pub!

We unknowingly booked at a horrible B&B in York. It was so bad, the four of us left the place at 6am and cut our trip short a day early. We will laugh about that trip for the rest of our lives.

http://laurahoward.com/holmlea/

Laura

Unfortunately it's getting out there and trying out things (local courses in whatever you like , going to the gym) I met folks through organizing my own events ...I started organizing halloween dos , easter things, drumming groups. I also started going to juggling workshops and other fun things that interested me and that's how I made friends. The festival scene for me is my hobby and I've made friends with mums that have children my daughter's age and have similar interests..it's frustrating and I don't have a definitive answer that will work for you...sorry.

 My mum just moved to Florida on her own several years back ..and at the age of 50 it was not easy making new friends...job wise her co workers were younger that liked going out clubbing and dancing in Miami but she got involved with a lot of things and made friends..she even found someone new and they've just married last Dec...so it's not easy it just takes practice.

You provided with several good ideas, and I do appreciate your input. Once the sprog is born I'm sure it will be easier to integrate.

If we get a dog in addition to the sprog, we'll have to beat pals off with a stick! 

Where do you live, Laura? I'll come to the pub with you!

I haven't had trouble making friends here, but I think that's due to a couple of things that maybe don't apply to most of you. First, I was born here. I already had aunts, uncles and cousins ready to introduce me to people. And I'm not looked at as an "outsider" (if that happens). Also, we moved a lot when I was a child -- five countries by the time I was 13. So I was already used to making new friends and kind of enjoyed the adventure of it all.

But, I've still made other non-relative friends here on my own, and haven't found it harder than in the US. But I think that's because I live in a small village here in the UK -- people walk everywhere and you bump into the same people every day in the village shop or in the post office or on the beach. After a while, people recognise you and know that you're "that American woman" who's moved into the house behind the Village Hall. So ... curiosity led to conversations which led to friendships. I now have a tight-knit group of really close female friends here, just as I had in the US. Lucky me! Two lots of friends!!

I think if I lived in a city, suburb or even large town and spent most of my time driving from place to place, it would be harder to meet new people.

Thanks for the sweet offer. Where abouts do you live?

A woman recently posted here she's in Surrey and a bit far away to gather, but Crawley is on the Surrey border and driving an hour is nothing.

I haven't given up on my British counterparts, but a brief reprieve would be nice.

Laura

It's been slow for me to make new Brit friends, but having given it a lot of thought recently I think it's more to do with my age (36) and the fact that dh and I don't have or want kids. Most women my age are already established in their circles and not necissarily out looking for new friends and most have kids.... I actually now think it would be the same in the US were I to start over somewhere away from where I used to live.... Having said that, dh's friends have absolutely become mine now - it just took a bit of time. And I've made some other expat friends who I'm quite close to - perhaps because we shared the common bond of being expats to start off with....

I just wanted to say thanks for the posts...i have lived here for three years now and can't say i've made any good friends...I have met some folks through work and part of the problem is me i can be a bit shy but i do make an effort..anyhow i am having a particularly bad day today....

i am switching jobs which is great for me...because i have not got along with my current co workers...i have worked in many offices and have not had a problem but this current office is very cliquey....so i was questioning whether i could have been more involved socially with my co workers...i have learned that it takes two to build friendships and it doesn't always happen easily...

thanks for the posts , they have made me feel that i am not alone when it comes to social issues...

I love my Brit friends. I didnt have any American friends till I was introduced to this board by one of them just over a year ago.
The first two years were tough but I think it was mostly because of my culture shock.
I was lucky to meet other school moms. I was accepted into a group of ladies and I met their friends and their friends.
I honestly can say I am more close with my Brit friends than I ever was with my American friends back in the USA. I really had trouble making friends in the USA for some reason.

Thanks for the sweet offer. Where abouts do you live?

Sorry, Laura. I'm in SW Wales.   Maybe we could meet up for a "virtual" pint sometime.