Seriously considering relocating to the UK

Kelly, your taking in this woman and her child is very laudable and shows that you are a good person. It does seem that you may have a talent for social work and I urge you to pursue that.

I think that the others on this thread have understood your desire to go to the UK. And, although you say you are looking for support and advice, you don't seem to realize that is exactly what you have been given. The others have tried to be honest with you in outlining the terms under which you would be eligible to live in the UK as well as offering you alternative options.

I can understand how frustrating this must be for you....to have such a strong desire to do something and feel that you are being thwarted every way you turn. No one is saying that you can immigrate. What they are saying is that you don't qualify right now. Go to school, get your social work degree, then you will qualify.

Everyone on this board ahs either gone through the process or is currently going through it (as I am). We do understand how confusing and emotional a time this is. Keep reading the other threads and maybe you'll find more answers. Good luck!

I guess no one is understanding me. I was looking for support and any advice.

People have given you excellent advice and suggested various avenues which may or may not work for you.

Unfortunately, VERY few countries allow people to just come over and work.  The US certainly does not.  In fact, if you look in the Repatriation section of this board, you'll see the difficulties US citizens face in bringing their own spouses over to live w/them in America. 

I'd urge you to come across for a visit.  Or at least doing some more research - for example, particularly into housing costs, b/c again it can't be stressed enough that space is a very different concept in the UK, and w/the size of your family your options will be somewhat more limited in the UK than in the US.  Also, contrary to popular belief, public transport isn't as reliable in some areas of the UK, necessitating the use of a car for some.  Cars are much, much more expensive to run in the UK, b/c of the cost of petrol, and you'd need a larger one.  You'd also need to sit the driver's licensing exams after a year, and these are not w/o serious cost. 

We all have goals and dreams.  But part of pursuing these is knowing that what is worthwhile is rarely easy.  Or fast. 

I am so sorry to come across as angry. I am hurting right now and I just wanted to talk to Americans who are in the UK, and also understood my reasoning for this.

You all have been so helpful and supportive. That is what I meant by saying, i came here for support. Trust me, I have seen immigration here. Post-911 syndrome here...Post London Bombings there. They seem to be worried about us good guys, that wouldn't harm a fly and treating us the same as the common terrorist sometimes.

I know costs are different. Trust me..I saw culture shock just from moving from Mass. to Kansas. Taxes, alone went down more than a half. Car insurance went down here 3 times less and cost of living the same. That isn't my fear. I am strong willed and confident. I can drive anyone nuts because I don't give up.

I hope you still allow me on the board and know that, I need your support as I go through this. I feel like a clam that just had their shell opened up for the first time and it is very scary out there.

I hope to get as much info from you all as I can. Any ideas on sponsorship, contacts, etc that would help us stay a family, is truly appreciated.

God Bless The WORLD as one,
Kelly Berrigan

I hope you still allow me on the board and know that, I need your support as I go through this.

Of course you are welcome on the board. If everyone that got a little upset was booted off, there'd be no one left! 

Since I joined UKY, I have received tremendous support and wonderful advice. The people here are always willing to lend and ear. Keep coming back and keep posting. You are very welcome!

  Housing is also much, much more expensive than Kansas, especially for a family your size and in Gloucestershire, b/c it is considered a very desirable location.  We're talking MUCH more expensive than Kansas.   

  It may be far more feasible for you to explore moving to another region in the US.  I was unhappy in Texas and moved to another state where I found life more suitable.  Have you explored moving to another region in the US?

  You stated in your original post that you relocated to Kansas from Massachusetts only a year ago.  That's quite a big shift and it sounds as if the adjustment has been bumpy.  And this is w/i the US.  Moving to another country requires a far, far greater period of adjustment, tbh. 

I think Expat made some very insightful comments above.  I was born, raised and lived in Kansas for 33 years -- the day I moved away was one of the happiest days of my life!

I moved to Tampa Bay, Florida -- loved it!

Then I met (and eventually married) a Brit -- thought moving over here would be a piece of cake (I mean I'd done the long distance move before, Kansas to Florida)...how wrong I was!  The cost of living here is SHOCKING, compared to Kansas and even Florida -- Tampa was not that much more expensive than the Kansas City metro area.  I've been here nearly two years now & most days I'm still struggling to adjust to life here.

Any ideas on sponsorship, contacts, etc that would help us stay a family, is truly appreciated.

I hope you've come to understand that 'sponsorship' only comes in the form of an employer willing - and ABLE - to get a work permit for you.  This is extremely difficult, b/c an employer must prove that no one from the entire EU is suitable for the job.  Social work is your best bet, probably, but you'll need a university degree.

No one wants to sound negative, but in your situation coming to the UK is going to mean some re-training whilst you are in the US, b/c you need qualifications from accredited institutions.

Again I can't stress enough the importance of visiting first.  A person who comes here on a work permit cannot access public funds for at least 4 years, and coming here as a social worker means rather low pay.  With 3 children w/special needs, high housing and transport costs, you need to very, very thoroughly consider how you will manage financially.

The culture is also very different, of course.  And a long visit can sort out whether this is truly the place for you.

Again I can't stress enough the importance of visiting first.  A person who comes here on a work permit cannot access public funds for at least 4 years, and coming here as a social worker means rather low pay.  With 3 children w/special needs, high housing and transport costs, you need to very, very thoroughly consider how you will manage financially.

Excellent points, Expat!