How special am I?

No, not looking for any pats on the back. lol. I just seem to have a bit of an unusual case, and it is leading to some questions that don't seem to be addressed anywhere. Here is the circumstance...

I am 37, and my fiance is quite a bit older (past his sell by date, is how he puts it). He will be 78 in two weeks. You would never know it to talk to him. We started out as penpals three years ago, and it slowly but surely developed into quite a love affair. I have been to see him twice, for a total of three months-having stayed with him each time. He asked me to marry him last year, when he took me out for my birthday. I am a late bloomer all the way around, as I am nearly finished with my university degree (more to that story!  ) Anyway, now I am ready to apply for my fiance visa, and you may be able to figure out already why I am a bit nervous. I have tons of proof that a relationship exists. I have saved every email (at least one a day) that he has ever sent. I have pictures and phone bills, and letters and cards. I don't think anyone would be able to deny that we are in love. Still...

1) Is it going to send sirens blaring?
2) He is obviously a pensioner-so getting a pension and some other allowances he is now entitled to.
3) Lives in a pensioners council house, where he pays no rent or council tax. (He knows he will lose many of the perks he is now getting)
4) What of the "no recourse to public funds" ?

I'm also complicating matters by having a federal student loan and child support for my daughter (living with her father)

What pitfalls am I headed for and should I be made aware of anything that isn't already worrying me to death?
I don't want to be without Mike any longer, and he is so counting on this coming off. I'm hoping to hear positive remarks to ease my mind, but I need to know the truth.

Your fiance is British.  As a UK national, HE can continue receiving whatever public funds he qualifies for.  What he cannot do is receive additional funds to contribute to your support or that of your daughter.  Nor can you apply for them on your behalf or that of your child - until you receive ILR.

Once you marry, however, he'll need to reapply as a couple, and they will take into consideration your income.  When you get a job, he'll need to reapply for housing and council tax credit as well.

This does not include NHS.

You are not allowed to work on a fiance visa, but you can as soon as you have married and changed to a spouse visa.

You will still need to pay your student loans off.  This is a debt that can never be discharged, even in personal bankrupcy. 

As far as his age, it isn't an issue.  It's a legitimate relationship.

I guess I should have said that my daughter will not be coming with me, I don't have custody. As far as the student loans and child support go, I didn't mean I didn't want to pay them, I meant HOW do I pay them ?(different currency aspect)

Oh, a lot of folks pay student loans back in teh US from here.  Try the Money Matters section of the board!    I'm sure you can probably work out a way to do child support like that as well.

I am 37, and my fiance is quite a bit older (past his sell by date, is how he puts it). He will be 78 in two weeks.

Depending upon the ECO of course, they will probably go to Paragraph 281b(iii) and read up on it because that's the rule that controls the decision when there's a noticably large age difference.  It gets pulled out and used at the British consulates in Bangkok and Manilla for example, but I don't see a case where it got used in North America.

So as long as your relationship has a history, and you're prep'ed up to answer a few questions about his family, his doings, how you spend your time as a married couple, and so on, then you'll be ok.

Everything else looks fine.  Great photo too!

  Thanks. I can tell this is going to be a roller coaster ride for emotions. One minute I'm positive nothing will go wrong, and the next I doubt I'll ever get there. Anyway, thanks for the information. We're soaking it all up, trying to get everything right. With any luck, I hope to be there by the end of May. (can't see me dancing around squealing, but I am!)

in my opinion, anyone who finds the person they want to be with forever is super special!!!! 

To be honest, the relationship *will* raise eyebrows, so bombard them with so much info that they have no legitimate reason to refuse.

I am concerned about the accomodation issue - where will you live once you marry?


Victoria

I thought as much. I intend to show them that we never go for more than a few hours without some sort of contact. With all the proof we can supply, it would be nearly impossible to deny we are in love. As far as accomodations, he called the housing association this morning, and they were more than happy to send a letter stating I had permission to live with him. Is there any reason to worry still? (I am still worried, I have horrible luck )

The housing association letter is essential, and it looks to me that all the conditions are met.

HOWEVER...there is still a chance that the ECO will decide this is not a genuine relationship, and may still refuse it.  If so, please don't be too despondent, as if the legal aspects are covered you will more than likely win an appeal.

Victoria

Thank you. I'll just have to hope now.  :\\\'(