Hopefully not old stuff to everyone, I just saw it today.
Subject: Why did the chicken cross the road?
>
> BARACK OBAMA:
> The chicken crossed the road because it was time
> for a CHANGE! The chicken wanted CHANGE!
>
> JOHN MC CAIN:
> My friends, that chicken crossed the road
> because he recognized the need to engage in
> cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens
> on the other side of the road.
>
> HILLARY CLINTON:
> When I was First Lady, I personally helped that
> little chicken to cross the road. This experience makes
> me uniquely qualified to ensure -- right from Day One! --
> that every chicken in this country gets the chance it
> deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn't
> about me.......
>
> GEORGE W. BUSH:
> We don't really care why the chicken crossed the
> road. We just want to know if the chicken is
> on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either
> against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.
>
> COLIN POWELL:
> Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the
> satellite image of the chicken crossing the road...
>
> ANDERSON COOPER - CNN:
> We have reason to believe there is a chicken,
> but we have not yet been allowed to have
> access to the other side of the road.
>
> JOHN KERRY:
> Although I voted to let the chicken cross the
> road, I am now against it! It was the wrong
> road to cross, and I was misled about the
> chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and
> will remain against it.
>
> PAT BUCHANAN:
> To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.
>
> MARTHA STEWART:
> No one called me to warn me which way that
> chicken was going. I had a standing order at
> the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the
> price dropped to a certain level. No little bird
> gave me any insider information.
>
> DR SEUSS:
> Did the chicken cross the road?
> Did he cross it with a toad?
> Yes, the chicken crossed the road,
> but why it crossed I've not been told.
>
> ERNEST HEMINGWAY:
> To die in the rain. Alone.
>
> JERRY FALWELL:
> Because the chicken was gay! Can't you
> people see the plain truth?' That's why they
> call it the 'other side.' Yes, my friends, that
> chicken is gay. And if you eat that chicken,
> you will become gay too. I say we boycott
> all chickens until we sort out this abomination
> that the liberal media white washes with seemingly
> harmless phrases like 'the other side. That
>chicken should not be crossing the road.
> It's as plain and as simple as that.
>
> GRANDPA:
> In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed
> the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed
> the road, and that was good enough.
>
> ARISTOTLE:
> It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
>
> JOHN LENNON:
> Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing
> roads together, in peace.
>
> BILL GATES:
> I have just released eChicken2007, which will
> not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file
> your important documents, and balance your
> check book. Internet Explorer is an integral
< part of the Chicken. This new platform is much
> more stable and will never cra...#@&&^(C% ........reboot. >
> ALBERT EINSTEIN:
> Did the chicken really cross the road, or did
> the road move beneath the chicken?
>
> BILL CLINTON:
> I did not cross the road with THAT chicken.
> What is your definition of chicken?
>
> AL GORE:
> I invented the chicken!
>
> COLONEL SANDERS:
> Did I miss one?
>
> DICK CHENEY:
> Where's my gun?
>
> AL SHARPTON:
> Why are all the chickens white? We need some
> black chickens.
