Admit intent to marry in the USA?

Hello again, yet another, perhap's irrelevant, question.......
If asked if I plan to marry when I (british citizen) enter the states (new york, far from friendly last time) and reply "yes" are there any forms, the equivelant to a uk fiancee visa, that I should present?? Ultimately, can they send me home for admitting my intent to marry whilst there?
I've been debating (and panicking) over admitting my intentions as many people on the net seem to think that answering yes will have them sending me packing but as my fiancee will be simultaneously going through the nationals line and our daughter with his surname will be with me I think it would be just plain stupid to pretend that I have no intentions to marry him especially as we will have already filled out an online spousal app (in advance to actually marrying) and that we admitted our plans to a midlands airport ECO who collared us in June. That and the fact that maintaining a web of lies on top of the current stress and incurring a ten year ban for fibbing may give me a heart attack.
I would like to just say yes and show them the statement of arrangements showing my responsibility to my two eldest children who will be remaining in the uk for the duration of our trip with their natural dad and then show them the letter from my employer confirming the date for my expected return to work.
I think this is enough but other opinions seem to counter it and suggest that admitting plans to marry is tantamount to not undoing your seatbelt and just waiting for the plan to turn round and take you back.I'm guessing I'm completely overthinking this but again some views have spooked me. Feel free to tell me that I'm making a mountain out of mole hill. Please!
This is the most masochistic adventure ever and my ability to rationalise and differentiate between valid concerns and completly melodramatic b*ll*cks is completely askew!     
P.S, Thank you to everyone for their advice, this website has been  a small island of sanity where you can get jargon filtered and not spend 3 quid a minute for it!

the golden rule- do not ever lie to an immigration officer.

There is nothing illegal about entering the US as a visitor to marry, as long as you are planning to return to the UK afterwards.  Bring proof that you are planning to return to the UK (a printout of the online spousal visa app might be good, for a start) and you'll be fine.

Thank you, that is a massive relief! I'm in the last few weeks before applying and keep obsessing over what may be only minor details so the reassurance from people who understand is brilliant. All of my friends and relatives seem to think it is no more complicated than opening a bank account whilst having the benefit of being on holiday and don't see what all of the fuss is about. So again, thank you very much.

To add to what springhaze has said, which is quite right, do not offer any information - only answer the question asked of you, e.g. if asked whether you know the time you would say only 'yes' or 'no'.

I can't speak to what the official, expert opinion would be on this matter, and I don't know about not offering information, but I'd agree never lie.  It could come back to haunt you down the road if you, for example, want to move to the US with your spouse and are applying for a visa.  When asked on his purposes for entering the US, my husband said he was getting married.  In his carry-on luggage, he brought the letter from his employer, his lease agreement and letter from his landlord regarding my moving in, and his statement letter regarding my visa application (all of which we were including in the visa package later on) to show I was applying for a UK visa and we intended to move and reside there permanently, and his work and housing docs supported that.  Now, the IO wasn't really sure how to handle this, to be honest.  My husband said he was quite anxious about it.  The IO left to talk to someone and it took a bit of time, but he was let through.  It seems they just didn't know what they were doing.  But I don't know that there'd have been any legal standing for preventing my husband's entrance or not - he was honest, marriages are allowed in the US on visitor visas, and we had proof we, more importantly HE, wasn't staying. 

Vicky can't and won't advise on anything to do with US immigration.

Vicky

Be honest and take as much info to show that you intend to return within the required time to the UK ie mortgage papers/rent book letter off your employer ect and proof of enough funds for whilst your there.

We did exactly the same thing and got through and got married and got the visa and returned home to the UK.

Indy and Sonya