Sister Asking for Stuff Already

We have just now started the process of getting things arranged for our move and already my sister is asking me to give her my stuff.

I just have to vent about this.  Anything I have ever gotten from her was paid for.  For example I bought a dishwasher from her once and paid more than she gave for it second hand.  I have given her things with the intention she would pay me later like when I sold Mary Kay- never got a dime or even a free meal!  My mom and I went into business with her two years ago.  I invested nearly $1,000 to start up the business- clothing racks and doing business items.  My mom invested nearly $7,000 in the business.  She forced us out and we agreed as long as we would see a little bit in return.  We were tired of the emotional stress from her b.s.   Never a dime.

So here we are, about to leave the country in a few months and she wants me to give her my freezer, antiques I got from my grandparents, and a Tempurpedic bed we paid $5000 for as my husband and I both have severe back problems.  Not I'll pay you $X but GIVE.

She is really being weird and to top it all off she wants me to GIVE her my stuff.  How about spending some time with me before I go?  We are selling everything off and will basically go to a home that is not furnished- just stuff that family can help us out with.  I am just sick of her disregard that I have to start all over in getting household items, furniture, cribs, baby stuff and things for my children. 

Does anyone have similar circumstances with their siblings/ family members?

my sister took back the Christmas present she gave me last year because she said I wouldn't be able to use it in the UK...

I remember when I was first going to the UK to live for 5 months to see if I liked it...my sister got strange on me. Instead of spending time with me before I left she became upset with me. She didn't want to hang out and didn't want to talk about my move. My sister and I are really close. I think she was mad at me for leaving. I think she thought I was leaving her and we wouldn't be close anymore and that I would forget who she was. I also think she was slightly jealous. All though she would never admit that.

Maybe your sister is feeling slightly jealous and upset that you are leaving. And instead of spending time with you she feels like you are leaving her and is a little upset.

As for her asking you to give her all your stuff without offering to pay for any of it...maybe she feels she is entitled to it. I don't know why she would feel that way. Maybe you should take her aside and talk to her and tell her that she can have anything of yours she wants as long as she pays for it. Don't let her say she will pay you later. And maybe you should also talk to her about how you are feeling. How you really want to spend time with her before you leave. Let her know you are going to miss her but still be there for her...

Some people get a little weird with the whole moving to the UK and it usually isn't the person moving. It is the people around them.

Good luck and I hope it all works out for you

I agree that maybe your sister is jealous...or maybe she's just upset that you are leaving...and that could be the reason (or at least contribute to) for her "weird" behavior.

As for the "give me" attitude, well I actually offered to get give a lot of things to my immediate family and close friends...but my hubby is already in the UK with all the essentials and we will most likely be renting a furnished house, so I wasn't concerned with making any money off things, just wanted to get rid of them as quickly as possible.  As for your specific situation, I would just put my foot down and tell her exactly what you are telling us.  "Look sis, I'm not trying to be rude here but I paid $5000 for this bed and I NEED the money.  I have to buy several new beds when I get to the UK for us and the kids and I really can't afford to give it to you.  I can sell it to you for less than I was going to ask for it, but I just can't give it to you for free."  If she doesn't understand that, you got a mess on your hands anyway.

Is there a reason your sister would/should get first dibs on your stuff, anyway? To add to TarnLover's point, you could just say "Sis, I was going to ask $X for the bed on craigslist, and since you're family, I can knock the price down to $Y, but I'm not selling the bed to become a millionaire, the money is going to help fund the move and necessary purchases once we arrive. If you don't want to pay $Y for the bed, I'll post an ad for it tomorrow."

Is there a reason your sister would/should get first dibs on your stuff, anyway? To add to TarnLover's point, you could just say "Sis, I was going to ask $X for the bed on craigslist, and since you're family, I can knock the price down to $Y, but I'm not selling the bed to become a millionaire, the money is going to help fund the move and necessary purchases once we arrive. If you don't want to pay $Y for the bed, I'll post an ad for it tomorrow."

I wouldn't even explain it:

"I want your bed!"

"Sure, happy to let you have it. It'll be $x. Do you want to pay me with cash or money order and when do you want to arrange to have it picked up?"

I wouldn't even explain it:

"I want your bed!"

"Sure, happy to let you have it. It'll be $x. Do you want to pay me with cash or money order and when do you want to arrange to have it picked up?"

Ha, love it! I was under the assumption that the OP would want/need to offer a "family discount". If not, I heartily agree with this option.

Ha, love it! I was under the assumption that the OP would want/need to offer a "family discount". If not, I heartily agree with this option.

I'm going on the assumption that the only family discount the sister wants is in the amount of $x, so I probably wouldn't even worry about it.

julie.bug so sorry you have to go through more bs with your family.  Sounds like your sister is very jealous.  I've had to deal with similar issues with my sister.  But, I think what some of the others have recommended is spot on.  Charge her -- if she doesn't like it then tough.  I would tell her she's getting a family discount with a big  on my face.

When I left the US, it was just to study abroad for a year of Uni and I left most of my stuff at my parents house.  I left a lot of clothes, appliances, pictures, jewelry and I have to say, i think my sisters made out pretty good!  I never ended up coming back because I met my husband and stayed so anything i didnt feel was important enough to pack in those 2 suitcases when i came over, was up for grabs.

I still see my little sister's pictures on facebook on a night out and see her wearing a shirt or necklace that I left behind 4 years ago. But that makes me happy more than anything because i absolutely love her to bits.  

My advice on your sis, who seems a bit greedy is try and sell everything and then anything you can't sell, let your family have if you're just going to have to get rid of it anyways.