How long did it take you to make friends in the UK?

I think it's more of an age thing than a location thing. I'm over 40 and most people I associate with are of a similar age and not into dressing or acting in a way that suggests promiscuity.  Also, I don't go out pubbing and clubbing any more which is probably where you're most likely to encounter that type of thing. If you are in your 20s and looking to meet people of a similar age, you are probably more likely to come across people who wear skimpy clothing and get drunk.

The best way to meet people I've found is to get involved with things that interest you, whether it be stamp collecting, train spotting or live music and you'll soon meet like minded people doing the same things.

if you really looked around

Right. But why would you want to look for them? If you don't hang out with people like that or in places they're likely to congregate, then you're not going to see people like that. Simple.

This:

I'm over 40 and most people I associate with are of a similar age and not into dressing or acting in a way that suggests promiscuity.

As for promiscuity, a quick Google found surveys which show that the UK is nowhere near the top of the list.

I have friends through work and friends through the house I live in, and I don't feel it took any longer than it did at home.  I have a good mix of male/female friends.  I think I fall into the little sister type of role with the guys at work, which I tend to do given that I have 4 brothers anyway.    I can't really say that I've found anything to be that different between here and back in NY, though.  Took about the same amount of time to make friends. 

Well, for one, it's not a sensitive issue, it was something which was commented upon and something which is (actually) a big part of living in Britain, especially if you are younger. Also, I'm not quite sure what you mean by the quick google. If you type in "Britain promiscuity" the first five of ten results link to articles about studies which demonstrate that Britons tend to have more sexual partners (and STDs and teen pregnancies) than the rest of the developed world. It's also one of those issues where there *is* a big divide between the US and UK and even if it isn't specific to your life, I think it is relevant here.

I mean, was this a discussion about relations between genders here, or was it not?

the only person in the restaurant with the fork in her right hand

Side note for this specific action.  My mother-in-law is left handed so when I first went out to dinner with her I noticed she held her fork in her right had because of this.  So I now have no problem eating with my right hand in public and being afraid to be looked at as the "American" who can't hold a fork right.  Instead I'm now just a left handed "Brit".  Or at least that's what they should believe. 

Of course when it comes to people who know it doesn't bother me.  I am American and that is how I was taught to hold a fork, doesn't make it wrong.

Sorry for the slightly off topicness of this.

I mean, was this a discussion about relations between genders here, or was it not?

It was a discussion about making friends in the UK. The promiscuity thing came about because someone said they had  hard time making friends here because they found the women where they live to be "slags."  But they have since also said, they don't believe women here are all like that.

I don't think a discusson of British sexual mores is really relevant to the original topic. The OP was talking about wanting to make friends, not how to have casual sex.  We've had discussions on here before about British women being more promiscuous than US women, and trust me it never ends nicely.   So perhaps we can leave it aside for now.

I think it's more of an age thing than a location thing. I'm over 40 and most people I associate with are of a similar age and not into dressing or acting in a way that suggests promiscuity.

I'm over 40, and while the women I associate with aren't promiscuous, they do dress up more and tend to wear tighter clothes, higher heels and heavier makeup than women I know in the US would do in similar situations.

Wearing a tight top doesn't  make you promiscuous, though. (That goes for any age.)

Side note for this specific action.  My mother-in-law is left handed so when I first went out to dinner with her I noticed she held her fork in her right had because of this.  So I now have no problem eating with my right hand in public and being afraid to be looked at as the "American" who can't hold a fork right.  Instead I'm now just a left handed "Brit".  Or at least that's what they should believe. 

I'm a left-handed Brit and I've never held a fork in my right hand... I just can't do it ! It feels so unnatural that if I tried to eat using my right hand, I'd probably end up missing my mouth and dropping food everywhere (kind of like trying to write with the 'wrong' hand... just feels awkward and uncomfortable to me). I don't really know many other left-handers though, so I'm not sure if other 'lefties' tend to do the same as your MIL or not.

I do find the women in London dress up more.  Well, than me, anyway.  I am trying to up my game a little bit.   I kind of relish the weekends for the jeans/hoodie uniform that I can throw on, but I do feel out of place if I'm going anywhere other than starbucks/sainsbury's/tesco, etc. 

But I haven't really found anyone unfriendly, yet. I mean, sure, but nothing dramatically different than it was in my office back in NY.  Actually, when I think about it, I found the NY women in  my office a little more two faced, in terms of being polite and then catty behind your back.  Here, I find the women are a little more straight forward. 

That could just be my company, though.  My firm at home was definitely more of a boys club so I think there was more competition among the women for jobs/projects, and that could explain the motivations. 

I do find the women in London dress up more.  Well, than me, anyway.  I am trying to up my game a little bit.   I kind of relish the weekends for the jeans/hoodie uniform that I can throw on, but I do feel out of place if I'm going anywhere other than starbucks/sainsbury's/tesco, etc. 

I understand this. I don't dress sloppy at all, but I still feel frumpy walking to school with all the girls dressed so nicely. To be honest sb15, you can probably spice up your regular look if you wore a nice pair of boots. Knee-high boots seem to be the trendy thing to wear.

Ha, it's like you've seen my closet.  That's been the game plan for me.

I traded out my beat up uggs for neater looking black boots.  That and sweaterdresses save me (and yet, comfortable) - but this isn't the girl talk thread, so I should cut myself off here.

In making friends though, I have found the one thing that really helps me was just plain good manners.  I think people respond to that pretty quickly, and it starts the foundation for friendly conversation.  Definitely in the work environment for me, anyway.

In making friends though, I have found the one thing that really helps me was just plain good manners.  I think people respond to that pretty quickly, and it starts the foundation for friendly conversation.  Definitely in the work environment for me, anyway.

Having someone with whom you can have a friendly conversation isn't the same as having a friend, though.

I have friendly conversations with many people, but it stops there because we don't connect beyond the trivial "how about the weather?" "how was your weekend?" types of conversations.

I consider those people to be acquaintances, not friends.

Not saying that they are immediately friends, it just was a good foundation.  The girlfriends I have at work - those started off with just e-mails in the beginning thanking them for something they did for me, and from there e-mail banter was born, and over the year, started hanging out more socially, and now we hang outside after work and talk about real stuff. 

Having someone with whom you can have a friendly conversation isn't the same as having a friend, though.

I have friendly conversations with many people, but it stops there because we don't connect beyond the trivial "how about the weather?" "how was your weekend?" types of conversations.

I consider those people to be acquaintances, not friends.

But isn't that how friendships start?

But isn't that how friendships start?

Snap!