Thank You . . . How do you see it?

Soon after coming to the UK I noticed how often thank you is said in most transactions, particularly ones at the till.  Although the fact that this happens doesn't greatly bother me, I see it from a negative viewpoint.  It seems to me that punctuating the end of every sentence with thank you (although it may be polite)  is an overuse and in a way dilutes it.  In America we may say it only once, at the end of a transaction, but that doesn't make it any less genuine or effective.  The fact that nearly every one here uses so many thank you's sort of says, to me at least, that they aren't really being super-nice, they're just doing the standard, habitual thing.

While reading the lists about what people like about England, I was surprised to find that some thought the lots of thank you's was a positive thing, and impressed them with how nice the person was.  I'm interested in finding out if the way I'm seeing it is peculiar to me or if others think of it similarly.  I'm not saying that it's a super nuisance to me, but I certainly don't go away thinking, "Gosh, wasn't she sweet?!"  

Let me know if I'm really off-track!  What do you think about all the thank you's?

Jewel

Hello there!

I'm no expert on this subject, but I thought that I would try to lend my two cents (or 2p, hee hee)....

anyway....

I grew up in the Midwest and most recently have lived in rural Minnesota, where people really DO have the "Minnesota-Nice."  You are constantly getting "Have a Nice Day"s and "Thank you"s and "How are you"s from people in the service industry.

Having visited places all over the world, I've seen every variance of niceties in cultures.  While visiting Las Vegas, I noticed that people NEVER said thank you!  And most of my contact was with people in the hospitality industry!!  I was surprised because I am so used to people being SO nice to me in the midwest (even in Chicago where I grew up!).  Then I went to France.  Enough said.   Then I went to Germany, where I found people to be only a little more friendly than France, except they aren't outright MEAN to you like the French.  Here in the UK, people are generally quite nice, or atleast they are in the places that I have been to.

Okay...back to your question....
Saying thank you a lot doesn't necessarily demean the statement to me.  But I am realistic about the fact that they may not really be meaning it.  I have often passed people in a hallway at work and have asked how they were, when really I didn't care what they had to say.  But it is just what you say to someone to be nice.  I guess I would much rather have a shop clerk in the UK say thank you 100 times before I leave the check-out point than have them say nothing to me at all.  Nothing bothers me more than when a shop clerk is talking to another employee while serving me OR worse yet, talking on the phone!!  So maybe the thank yous aren't sincere, but it is a sign that they are at least 1/2 paying attention to you!

So really, what I mean is that maybe they don't exactly mean "Thank you!" when they say "thank you"....what they are really saying is..."Aren't I nicer than the French people??  At least I acknowledged your presence!"

And that's good enough for me!  

LOL I loved it!  Charming!  You really made me laugh, thanks!  I haven't been to France yet, but I'll keep your comments in mind  

I definitely take your point as well.  I am also really annoyed when cashiers talk to others; it is rude in my opinion.  And it is lovely that the ones here in the UK are generally very pleasant and there's nothing wrong with the thank you's, it just doesn't make them super super nice people who's every concern is for your well being.  

Out of interest, I have discussed this with my husband and we have both brainstormed about how this custom of saying thank you so often developed.  I think his best point was that the British, although they aren't aware of it, use the civil politeness of "thank you" in order to keep a distance, although a friendly distance, between themselves and the customers.  It is almost like a "protection" of sorts, and seems to go hand in the hand with the famous British reservation.  

Any other ideas on that?  

Cheers!
Jewel

I've noticed the thank yous. They use it when saying goodbye.  

What sets us apart from the English (I'm talking generally here) is we say you're welcome. I've had quite a few comments about how polite the Americans are simply because we say You're welcome.

It means about the same as "Have a nice day!"  .... Which means it that it means nothing much, other than "Our  interaction has come to an end and I can't think of a better way to conclude other than to use this bit of linguistic flotsam."  

What sets us apart from the English (I'm talking generally here) is we say you're welcome. I've had quite a few comments about how polite the Americans are simply because we say You're welcome.

YES YES YES!!!
It is totally true!!!

A British associate of my husband's just spent 5 months in Minnesota on an international assignment for their company.  He came back with tons of notes to compare with my husband on Americans vs. Brits (my husband is a yank)!!  Anyway, one of the things he said is that he had to deal with the "Minnesota-Nice" (as I mentioned here before).  My husband said to him that we have to deal with the British "thank you"s.  And this guy's actual reply was, "Well, but YOU say you're welcome!"

Teeheehee...  

I work in a shop and do say an insanely large amount of thank you's during the day. They seem work as a pleasant little filler. Like a sign of acknowledgement. Nothing more or less.

Sorry Jehcekah to hear about your unpleasant experience with the French. What part did you go to ? I spent some time travelling on the back of a motorcycle and found the people very friendly in the countryside. Plus I think there is a sense of comraderie amongst bikers.
I went again with my kids and found the French women were absolutely smitten with my young son. They couldn't keep their hands off of him. Needless to say, he enjoyed his time immensely.

As a Brit, I say "thank you", "excuse me please" and "sorry" a lot.  They're not meaningless or artificial, but perhaps not quite so heartfelt as when you Americans (occasionally) say them.  By the same token, I often forget to say "you're welcome" or "have a nice day" when perhaps I ought to, but they seem such artificial expressions to me so I only tend to remember when I really mean it.