An economist in France who works for their national electricity company has written a tongue-in-cheek guide to getting ahead in business by being a slacker. (It's titled "Bonjour Paresse," or "Hello Laziness," and is flying off the presses there.) I haven't read it, but there was an article about it in the T2 section of Tuesday's (August 17) London Times. The guide's basic premise is that the less you do at work, the greater your chances of getting ahead. There was also a sidebar in the article that I thought you'd all find funny, particularly those of you who've done your time in hell by working in a typical office.
I quote:
HOW TO REACH THE TOP WITHOUT WORKING
FOLLOW THESE RULES not only to avoid doing any work but to guarantee rapid promotion:
1. Yes, yes, yes--agree with every decision, never argue: better to be collectively wrong than right on your own.
2. Look and sound the part: dress in corporate style and always use meaningless words. "Benchmarking" is a perfect example.
3. Never, under any pretext, accept a position with real responsibility. And never, ever, do any work yourself: delegate everything. Temps, trainees and freelances are the only people who are paid by results, so they will do any real work that needs doing.
4. Always be available: make it clear that "work comes first." Leave a few minutes late--never early--in the evenings.
5. Lunch with your colleagues: eating alone is too individualist and therefore suspect.
6. Attend all meaningless seminars, motivation weekends, office drinks, works outings, the boss's wife's birthday party.
7. Look desperately busy--always carry files in the corridor, take files home with you (no need to open them).
8. Never instigate any changes or innovations--only executives who make themselves visible are ever sacked.
9. Seek positions in which your progress is impossible to determine: a highly specialized technical post nobody else understands, or an area so vast, such as "integration of antidiscriminatory strategies," that though it may be important, success cannot be determined.
The guide sounds pretty funny, and it's definitely on the "to get" list.
