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Topic: Starting all over again  (Read 1962 times)

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Starting all over again
« on: September 12, 2011, 09:06:07 PM »
So, about 5 years ago, my hubby and I finally ended our long distance relationship and married and I got my spousal visa for the UK. He decided a short time later, that he wanted to try life in the States. Went through the whole process for him to come here (we did DCF so we weren't separated then) for him to decide 2 years later that he wanted to go back to the UK. There were actually many reasons...mainly his dad being older and ill. So, being the supportive wife that I try to be....he is now in the UK trying to find work and a place to live, while I once again sit here waiting....and waiting. Its very frustrating. I find myself almost angry at times at my hubby for putting us through this. I only expressed that anger once, a few days before he left, and I think he understands its more frustration at this whole thing. I'm getting too old to be uprooting my life...AGAIN....and starting over.
I really have not missed this distance with us being apart. As a matter of fact...like you all I'm sure, I HATE IT. I'm not too bad during the day, but at night, I'm lonely....and frightened about what lies ahead. He doesn't even have a job...so we're not even close to us being able to apply for visas.

 :\\\'(
09/08/2011-Glyn leaves for UK
01/30/2012-Biometrics for UK spousal & dependent visas sent out w/ application same day
02/03/2012-Email from UK Consul General application needs further processing will receive decision within 10 working days.
02/09/2012-Request for more payslips and custody papers for daughter.
02/22/2012-Submit the requested documents with prayers.
02/24/2012-UK settlement visas issued :)
03/12/2012-Arrive in MAN UK :)


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Re: Starting all over again
« Reply #1 on: September 12, 2011, 09:20:39 PM »
It's very, very hard to start over from scratch in a new country. I'm having myself a down day today (I don't let myself have many, but there are some days only booze can improve), so I'll happily commiserate.

Heh. We saw a documentary on Doris Day last night (she has a new album on the charts here!). I never realized, she had a pretty crap life. Dad abandoned her at five, hit by a train on her way to a dance class and shattered her leg, married a psycho, lost all her money to bad management, lost her husband and son to cancer. And she is totally Doris Freaking Day through the whole thing.

I'm really trying to reach down to my inner Doris Day today.

Oh, god...if my friends back home new I was trying to channel Doris Day...


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Re: Starting all over again
« Reply #2 on: September 12, 2011, 10:01:40 PM »
It's very, very hard to start over from scratch in a new country. I'm having myself a down day today (I don't let myself have many, but there are some days only booze can improve), so I'll happily commiserate.

Heh. We saw a documentary on Doris Day last night (she has a new album on the charts here!). I never realized, she had a pretty crap life. Dad abandoned her at five, hit by a train on her way to a dance class and shattered her leg, married a psycho, lost all her money to bad management, lost her husband and son to cancer. And she is totally Doris Freaking Day through the whole thing.

I'm really trying to reach down to my inner Doris Day today.

Oh, god...if my friends back home new I was trying to channel Doris Day...


You just made me chuckle...thanks for that. I hate feeling sorry for myself, because I know there are people far worse off than I am...but like you said, there are some days only the booze can help, and I'm thinking a nice glass of red wine may just take that edge off tonight. ;D

Again, thanks for that laugh....Doris Freaking Day....lol.
09/08/2011-Glyn leaves for UK
01/30/2012-Biometrics for UK spousal & dependent visas sent out w/ application same day
02/03/2012-Email from UK Consul General application needs further processing will receive decision within 10 working days.
02/09/2012-Request for more payslips and custody papers for daughter.
02/22/2012-Submit the requested documents with prayers.
02/24/2012-UK settlement visas issued :)
03/12/2012-Arrive in MAN UK :)


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Re: Starting all over again
« Reply #3 on: September 12, 2011, 10:25:40 PM »
I hate to think what this would have been like pre-Internet. At least I'm able to keep track of my friends and call home and keep up on the news.

I've spent a large chunk of my time online for so many years, it means that part of my life hasn't changed at all, because I can go to all the same sites. It's made the transition so much easier.

And this place, of course. It's the best source for 'where do I get X?' and 'what do they call Y?'


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Re: Starting all over again
« Reply #4 on: September 15, 2011, 10:39:37 AM »
Hey there, I only joined the site a few days ago but I get ur story. My husband and I have been married for 11yrs and lived happily in the US for 10yrs. We did his Green Card etc. (What a pain in the ass that was!) But we moved back to the UK in 2009 w 3 little boys in tow. They were 1,3,and 7 at the time. It was a lot of hard work, settling them and myself into our new lives; where he just seemed to breeze back as if he never left. I am going through the process of getting ILR now. Another pain in the ass! But, I am happy here and so are the kids. As a matter of fact, I think it has made my relationship w my husband even stronger. Sure, I still miss home, LOTS! Mostly, my sis. But I have new friends here too. U'll be ok. I was the one that had to live in America because of poor family health and my husband agreed. After nursing my Dad, who died from leukemia in 2006, I think agreeing to live there was one of the greatest things my husband ever did for me. Ur sacrifice may mean the same to him one day. You will be just fine. 




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