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Topic: Bedroom for each child?  (Read 1235 times)

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Bedroom for each child?
« on: October 04, 2011, 04:49:23 PM »
Hi,

Wasn't sure where to post this, so here goes...

My husband's ex-wife has custody of their two children. She received a significant settlement that was intended for her to buy a 3-bedroom house for her and the kids.

We just found out she only bought a 2-bedroom place and pocketed the rest of the money (she took a 3-week Caribbean cruise) and her daughter (who is 11) has to share her bedroom. Can she do this?  I'm wondering if we have any legal recourse against her to force her to sell and get another bedroom. This isn't the first outrageous thing she's done, but this almost tops it all.  The daughter needs a space of her own, especially as she gets older. The son is almost 14.

Thoughts? Suggestions? Law regarding children each having their own bedrooms?

Thanks everyone,
Cyd


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Re: Bedroom for each child?
« Reply #1 on: October 04, 2011, 05:26:56 PM »
With two children of different sexes at that age it does seem very odd and I'm surprised the children haven't kicked up a bit of a fuss, however, I doubt very much that there is any legal requirement for children to have their own room - that would really penalise people who simply couldn't afford to do such a thing!


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Re: Bedroom for each child?
« Reply #2 on: October 04, 2011, 05:40:05 PM »
Actually, isn't there a rule against it? On the visa boards, we advise people that accommodation can't be overcrowded and part of that is two people of the opposite sex over the age of 10 can't share a bedroom unless they're living together in a relationship akin to marriage. However, if the mother is sharing the room with the 10 year old girl, I don't think there's anything that can be done.


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Re: Bedroom for each child?
« Reply #3 on: October 04, 2011, 11:14:11 PM »
I used to work in social housing and while there are certainly guidelines (to help work out the number of rooms/size of house to allocate a family) I'm pretty sure there's no law.  Councils will have regulations anywhere they are involved eg, children's homes, foster care etc but in private homes I think it's up to the adults in the home (or the children when they get old enough to voice an opinion) to allocate space. 

I'm not aware that you can be in trouble (with the law) for only being able to afford a home where your children may have to sleep in mixed sex groups - however unadvisable that may be after a certain age!


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Re: Bedroom for each child?
« Reply #4 on: October 05, 2011, 07:25:01 AM »
Did the settlement specifically state it was for a 3-bedroom house anywhere in it? If so you might have some recourse. Otherwise, there really aren't any options that I'm aware of.
Also, a 3 week cruise isn't likely to burn up all the money difference between a 2 and 3 bedroom house, so it may be the settlement wasn't large enough to buy a 3 bedroom house where she (or indeed the children) wanted to live. Make sure you have the full story before trying to do anything here...


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Re: Bedroom for each child?
« Reply #5 on: October 05, 2011, 09:03:43 AM »
Is there space in the loft to create a third bedroom? Perhaps that is what she had in mind when she bought the space.  I'm pretty sure there is no legal recourse to force her to sell and get a bigger place, but if the kids decided they didn't like the arrangement they might use it as a leaping off point to maybe move in with their dad? Would you both have accommodation for the kids if it came to that? 
We stole countries with the cunning use of flags. Just sail around the world and stick a flag in. "I claim India for Britain!" They're going "You can't claim us, we live here! Five hundred million of us!" "Do you have a flag …? "What? We don't need a flag, this is our home, you bastards" "No flag, No Country, You can't have one! Those are the rules... that I just made up!...and I'm backing it up with this gun, that was lent to me from the National Rifle Association."


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Re: Bedroom for each child?
« Reply #6 on: October 05, 2011, 11:58:44 AM »
Thanks everyone. I checked the settlement and it states she had to buy a house, but didn't indicate the number of bedrooms so I don't think there is any recourse.  I guess I'm just really angry with her as this is the last in a long list of things she has done where the kids seem to be at the bottom of her list of priorities, including giving away the children's dog because she simply couldn't be bothered to find a kennel for it while she was on holiday.

She received plenty of money to buy a 3-bedroom in the area she lives. She simply doesn't want to work so she's probably keeping the extra so that when her maintence payments stop next year she'll have money in the bank and not have to go to work (she's never been employed). As somehow who started working at 14 it gets my goat a bit (OK, a lot). Thought maybe this was something we could force her to actually do the right thing as the daughter really should have her own room especially as she get older.

My husband struggled to get any visitation at all (tens of thousands of pounds of legal fees) so it's not an option for them to live with us.

Thanks again,
Cyd


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