Children and Gift Giving

Several years ago, I read an article in one of the women's magazines, either Family Circle or Good Housekeeping, about children and gift giving.

The author talked about how one Christmas, she was horrified to witness that her daughter was extremely greedy and ungratful about the presents she had received, making selfish comments as "This isn't what I wanted!"  "I wanted this in the bigger model", complete with accompanying temper tantrum.

Said author decided it was time to take action and from then on, not only pared down the amount of gifts for birthdays and Christmas, but also included her daughter in going out to choose and buy gifts for others.  The idea was she would learn that people put time and consideration into picking a gift.  It would hopefully help her to respect and appreciate others' efforts.

According to the author, after putting this into practice, her daughter  was reformed and no longer displayed temper tantrums at birthdays and Christmas.


Although I read this article many years ago when my older son was still a baby, it struck me as a good idea.  Now that my oldest is six, I thought it might be worthwhile to give it a go myself.

I thought the idea might be of interest to parents here, especially this time of year.

Ho, Ho, Ho   

Last year my cousins son wanted a video game that was rated m for mature. He was only 7 at the time. I refused to buy it. So I got him another one. When he opened the package he was not only unhappy about the gift. He made a very loud point of saying I do not like this. He mummbled the whole night about how awful the gift was. I was 4 months pregnant and very emotional and wanted to ring the little guys neck. My husband could not believe that he was so rude. This year he is not getting anything from us. I told his mother that if he is going to be so rude to others he is not worth getting a gift. To my shock she agreed! She said she had been having a hard time as his father drowns him with expensive gifts. She can't keep up. Not that she wants to either. She has tried to do the give to charity but if he doesn't get a tootsie roll in responce he says it wasn't worth it. I am so happy my DD is nothing like this.

I think it is important to teach children that gifts are special things. If they get gifts so often and in such quantities that there is no magic or special happiness to it - if it because ordinary - then I think that just breeds ungratefulness, as the article you mentioned says. I'm all about a few nice presents for Christmas, and not giving him everything he wants every time he wants it! Giving and getting gifts needs to be special.

I was a very spoiled child (in a good way) but did have a terribly bratty Christmas one year when i had rushed through opening all my presents (i must say my dad is very overzealous when it comes to christmas-he way overbuys!)

i said 'Is that all?  Am i done?'

This is after opening about 30 presents.

After that, i was taught the meaning of Christmas by having my gifts substantially lessened every year.  It's more about being together than volume.


It was innocent though.  my nephews say stuff like 'oh i already have that' or 'this present stinks' and that is just....rude.

and my brother just sits there.  *rolls my eyes* 
 

How's this for sharing Xmas presents ... when I was about 7 some thoughtful soul gave my brother (he's 10 years older than me)  a Playboy jigsaw.  He wasn't very interested in it and put it to one side.  When he came back later he found his clever 7 year old sister putting the last few pieces in and saying "look at the pretty lady!"

I never go overboard on gifts because i'm appalled by the attitudes of the children I see around me, mainly my nieces and nephews. You do a child NO favours by giving them everything they want. I have a spending limit on my children and when I get to it, that's it.  All this materialism that raises its ugly head around the holidays makes my skin crawl.