So sorry to hear, Kezzie.
I think about this a lot, since Covid... my parents are in their late 70s and not in perfect health. The entire family already thinks I am a scumbag loser for 'abandoning' the family to live in Scotland. If the worst should happen and they die and I'm unable to travel for the funeral, I wouldn't be able to 'prove' to them that I actually *do* care about them, and my poor sister will have to deal with everything on her own.
Thankfully they've just been vaccinated, so hopefully that means they will be ok for a while.
My sympathies to you and your husband... I hope that once the shock wears off, he'll realise that 96 is a good innings and hopefully the father had a good life, and didn't suffer much at the end.