What are Brits missing?

Peedal -- Are you divulging your political affiliations here?

Just wait until I can vote....

Does he think he will have problems settling over there?

I'm not sure. He's always said that he'd never move just because of something, but just for someone (me ). And he's said that he's not gaining anything by moving to US which surprised me I think because "this is America!!!" (my thoughts)....

But he also said, through what you've all said on this board, that home is where you make it. If you want to make a place home, you will. If you don't then you'll never be happy. And not to compare the differences because it will drive you crazy. He wants to move here because he wants me to keep comfortable in surroundings I know and have my family still nearby. He says he'll be happy and that with internet (webcams, e-mails, phone), his family is never so far away. All he needs for work right now is his laptop and phone connection so it's great he is flexible like that! He is planning a longer stay through December into January to see a little more of "life" here.

So thx for this board - you don't know who's reading it but it helps a lot!

Good point, New-Dawn.  I think you are looking forward to your move(?).  On the other hand, my British husband has no desire to ever move to the USA - absolutely none.

I am more looking forward to it than not, but to be honest and I don't wish to offend *anyone*, I am not under any illusions! There are many things I will find difficult to handle (the religious thing is worrying me a lot tbh) and Hubs is under no illusions anymore about "home" either having lived abroad for many years.

For us, we have a better chance of achieving the life we want over there and there are some personal factors like family being around if we have children (I have no family left apart from my Step Dad) and my best (British but naturalized) friend will live about 20 minutes from us.

One thing I have learned though is "Never say Never" and I like having another English speaking country to go live in that offers so much scope for a change.  Ultimately though, we would both live in France given the choice!

  Ultimately though, we would both live in France given the choice!

Now you're talking!  Or perhaps Spain?

My life is, on the whole, better over here in the UK -- largely due to my husband & his family.  I'm a homeowner *finally* and have more economic security than I ever did in the States.  As previously mentioned, I feel freer to be myself here, etc.  Now if I can just get the job thing down, and the friend thing down, and the weather thing down...I might just be as happy as a pig in a poke.

I'm not sure. He's always said that he'd never move just because of something, but just for someone (me ). And he's said that he's not gaining anything by moving to US which surprised me I think because "this is America!!!" (my thoughts)....

But he also said, through what you've all said on this board, that home is where you make it. If you want to make a place home, you will. If you don't then you'll never be happy. And not to compare the differences because it will drive you crazy. He wants to move here because he wants me to keep comfortable in surroundings I know and have my family still nearby. He says he'll be happy and that with internet (webcams, e-mails, phone), his family is never so far away. All he needs for work right now is his laptop and phone connection so it's great he is flexible like that! He is planning a longer stay through December into January to see a little more of "life" here.

So thx for this board - you don't know who's reading it but it helps a lot!

I think he will gain a lot more than he believes. Broadly speaking, I find these things work well when the woman still has her family around her as men make their new wives their family in a lot of ways, whereas the hardest thing for most of the women here from what I gather is lack of their family and support network around them (hence sites like this).

This way you can always both decide to come to the U.K if things change or if he doesn't settle, but he is onto a winner to start with if his work enables him to work anywhere with a modem.

I wish you all the best and don't forget he can join in on here as well if he wants to

My life is, on the whole, better over here in the UK -- largely due to my husband & his family.  I'm a homeowner *finally* and have more economic security than I ever did in the States.  As previously mentioned, I feel freer to be myself here, etc.  Now if I can just get the job thing down, and the friend thing down, and the weather thing down...I might just be as happy as a pig in a poke.

Exactly!!!

When I lived in the US... I am afraid to say this but I was on Food Stamps......and some months it was.. do I feed my kids or pay my bills......and that is something I don't want to ever face again! I never had been on holiday. We have 2 newish cars...so monetarily i am 150% better off over here. But then I was married to a white trash okie.....not just limited to Kentucky...they are regional...lol

There wasn't one thing that stuck out about America that said "Pick Me" other than getting off the North Sea helicopters, but that is more of a personal choice.  My British DH came to America to live with me.  (I lurk around because I'd love to tryout his country too, maybe someday).  We came to the US for work, pure and simple.  In the UK his only job prospects were staying on the oil rigs in the North Sea, I could come into my office in Houston.  For our first 2 years here, he HATED Houston.  (His last residence in the UK was in the Sedburgh, a delightful little village in the Yorkshire Dales Park.)  Now he simply disklikes Houston.  He didn't like the fact that everything was privatly owned and you couldn't just hike or ride your bike on any path you see, but he's found nice parks and has adjusted quite nicely.

He has come to like the fact that his job prospects are much better in the US.  He works in health care and has an interest in law enforcement.  He didn't relish the prospect of competing with 700 other applicants for a job driving and ambulance so he could one day become a paramedic.  He's slightly color blind which takes him out of the running for law enforcement in the UK.  He also like the fact that he can go to school here in his spare time and get a university degree. 

As for news from home and internationalness, my DH reads BBC news online every day and can find out everything he needs to know.  If you live in a large city, you meet people from many countries.  The UK being in Europe means that they have a concern for what goes on in most of those countries.  Here we have more of a concern for what goes on in neighboring states rather than our neighboring countries. 

Hope this helps
Becca

The UK being in Europe means that they have a concern for what goes on in most of those countries.  Here we have more of a concern for what goes on in neighboring states rather than our neighboring countries. 

With respect, this is something that particularly bothers me about the US.... 

When I lived in the US... I am afraid to say this but I was on Food Stamps......and some months it was.. do I feed my kids or pay my bills......and that is something I don't want to ever face again!

Don't be ashamed.  I think there are a number of us here who struggled financially in the States and have found a better life here in the UK.

i miss conveniences..and although  a lot of you DON'T like the tons of choices.. I'd like just One choice  of certain things..  not being able  to find one kind of something without going way out of my way.. or saving it for a trip to the city centre  is  a pain..  

Exactly!!!

When I lived in the US... I am afraid to say this but I was on Food Stamps......and some months it was.. do I feed my kids or pay my bills......and that is something I don't want to ever face again! I never had been on holiday. We have 2 newish cars...so monetarily i am 150% better off over here. But then I was married to a white trash okie.....not just limited to Kentucky...they are regional...lol

You have no need to be afraid to say that, we have all had hard times and when children are involved, one must do what they need to do

i miss conveniences..and although  a lot of you DON'T like the tons of choices.. I'd like just One choice  of certain things..  not being able  to find one kind of something without going way out of my way.. or saving it for a trip to the city centre  is  a pain..  

Yeah, there's a couple of things I'm going to miss if we move back to Blighty - white cheddar popcorn, Mountain Dew, Sweet Baby Ray's barbecue sauce. But then there are things I miss from the UK (Ribena, Crunchie bars, granary bread). So it's a trade-off.

Yeah, there's a couple of things I'm going to miss if we move back to Blighty - white cheddar popcorn, Mountain Dew, Sweet Baby Ray's barbecue sauce. But then there are things I miss from the UK (Ribena, Crunchie bars, granary bread). So it's a trade-off.

Exactly....

With respect, this is something that particularly bothers me about the US.... 

I couldn't agree more. Thankfully, other Americans in Philly felt the same way last Sat...

I think he will gain a lot more than he believes. Broadly speaking, I find these things work well when the woman still has her family around her as men make their new wives their family in a lot of ways, whereas the hardest thing for most of the women here from what I gather is lack of their family and support network around them (hence sites like this).

I actually think the opposite is true.  While I agree that women miss their families and friends I believe they're much better at seeking out and even forming new support networks(like this forum).  Which is why I think it's much more common for women to make the move and to succeed in living as expats.  I know a lot of multi-cultural families and by and large it's the women who've made the move.  

But I have to say MI Friend that it seems like moving abroad is something that you can't picture yourself ever doing-and if that's the case then you're probably right to trust your instincts.  It's hard enough even when you want to.  I just wouldn't automatically assume that it'll be any easier for you boyfriend to make the move just because he's a man.