quotes

“I know who you are, and I am not impressed.”
 Joan Jett
 

Live so that you wouldn’t be ashamed to sell the family parrot to the town gossip.
~Will Rogers

"The only reason a great many American families don't own an elephant is that they have never been offered an elephant for a dollar down and easy weekly payments." ~Mad Magazine

If at first you don't succeed, try again. Then quit. There's no use being a damn fool about it.
-- W.C. Fields

I'm sure some of you have read this...

Reason Season Lifetime -

When someone is in your life for a REASON. . . It is usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally, or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend, and they are! They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then, without any wrong doing on your part, or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered. And now it is time to move on.

Then people come into your life for a SEASON. Because your turn has come to share, grow, or learn. They bring you an experience of peace, or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it! It is real! But, only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons; things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person, and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life. It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.

written by Brian A. "Drew" Chalker

Success is getting what you want. Happiness is wanting what you get. ~ Dale Carnegie

And some giggles...from Jack Handley 


I think the mistake a lot of us make is thinking the state-appointed psychiatrist is our 'friend.'

When you go for a job interview, I think a good thing to ask is if they ever press charges.

I wish outer-space guys would conquer Earth and make people their pets, because I'd like to have one of those little basket-beds with my name on it.

"When they are alone they want to be with others, and when they are with others they want to be alone. After all, human beings are like that."

Gertrude Stein


"If you realize that all things change, there is nothing you will try to hold on to."

"Anyone who works is a fool. I don't work - I merely inflict myself upon the public."

--Robert Morley
 

Don't let men put anything over on you except an umbrella - Mae West

All men hear is blah, blah, blah, blah, SEX, blah, blah, blah, FOOD, blah, blah, blah, BEER   - Dennis Leary

The torpid artist seeks inspiration at any cost, by virtue or by vice, by friend or by fiend, by prayer or by wine. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid. - Kierkegaard

You have enemies? Good. That means you've stood up for something, sometime in your life.

Winston Churchill


The greatest part of our happiness depends on our dispositions, not our circumstances

Martha Washington


In God we trust, all others we virus scan

unknown

"Frankly my dear, I don't give a dam*" -Rhett Butler

"I can't think about that now, I'll go crazy if I do. I'll think about that tomorrow." -Scarlett O'Hara

"It's funny, I guess sometimes when you do nothing at all, things just have a way of fixing themselves." -J.D. from "Scrubs"

Celebrity is death.. celebrity.. that's the worst thing that can happen to an actor ~ John Cusak

Truth is like the sun. You can shut it out for a time, but it ain't goin' away ~ Elvis Presley

"You know, I've actually been very good about not going on the Internet, I only look at things that my publicist and my friends send me, although I did see this one thing that my publicist sent me, I went online and it said, "oh my god, Hiro Nakamura, I love him so much. I want to make him my pet. I want to lock him up, talk to him, kiss him, I want to make him literally my pet." You know what, as long as they feed me, I'm all for it."

Actor Masi Oka on Hiro's internet sucess

Alicia!!  That gave me a MUCH needed laugh!!!!

When the white man arrived in Africa, they had the bibles and the black men had the land. And the white man said, “Close your eyes, and let us pray.” And when we opened our eyes, the black men had the bibles and the white men had the land.

desmond tutu