what do you all think?

Hey it's your big day.  If the dress is important to you and the setting is important to your fiance then I'm sure you can make compromises elsewhere.  Maybe if you have an idea of your exact budget and timeframe you'll feel better. 
I don't think it's a bad idea though to give yourself a couple months to get your bearings.

Very well said!

Hey it's your big day.  If the dress is important to you and the setting is important to your fiance then I'm sure you can make compromises elsewhere.  Maybe if you have an idea of your exact budget and timeframe you'll feel better. 
I don't think it's a bad idea though to give yourself a couple months to get your bearings.

Thank you Mindy and Stacey..that really helps.
I think we CAN afford the wedding the way we would like it, although his mum saying we didnt have enough time then him saying maybe wed not have the money just sorta freaked me out. We dont need a hire car, etc. And anything I can make I will..Im gonna make the candles for the reception, I already have all the stuff for it, so that wont cost us anything, things like that. Once I get there it will be so much easier to see how much we have how much things are etc.


And belindaloo, thank you too I am just the type to get very lost very easily, add to that driving on the other side, and the way the roads are etc...scary! But I am far too independent to not learn to drive on my own I cant be cooped up at home all day every day Id go nuts.


Quarter-Gill that place was really nice

I am finding myself getting to the point that I am considering compromising on the one thing I didnt want to..I found THE dress, its approx £300. But now I have started to think thats too much gonna check around to see if I can find it elsewhere cheaper but Im not gonna hold my breath

Did I mention his parents offered to pay for the food? I cant remember now The flowers will be really simple and I am hoping to find someone that does bulk to make it cheaper..or at least will let me pay by the stem and not arrange them for me.

Also making our invitations..I have mentioned making the cake myself and part of it would be a dummy cake...I used to do cake decorating so I know I am capable esp since I want super simple design...swiss dots

what are the things that are in every wedding and arent a choice as far as what can be taken out?

Well I just recently did this wedding stuff here's some money saving ideas.

Venue: Other than food and liquor this was our #1 expense. I second the registry office.

Dress: Ebay! Seriously. If you know the designer and the style of your dress look for it there. Also veils, tiaras, invites, etc.

Flowers: I did all my own flowers - bouquets, boutineers (learned how to do this from a website and practice), and the tables. I got my flowers online. I got mine from www.freshroses.com  I'm not sure if they ship internationally, but I'm sure there is flower supplier that does.

Photographer: If you could get his cousin that would be great. We gave out disposables to the guests to take pics. Also, lots of people will send you the digital pictures they took with their own cameras.

DJ: Do your own music. You could give this project to DF if he's into that stuff. Burn your own wedding CDs (iTunes or your own collection) and play on the stereo.

Cake: Making it yourself is a fabulous idea, but remember baking here is a different can of worms.

Food: IL's are they going to do the drinks as well? or BYOB? If you adjust the time of day you get married - say early afternoon then people won't drink as much - cheaper! I'm also a dork who loves wedding punch so you might be able to skip the frosty beverages, let people buy their own at the after party at the local pub.

Invites: I made our invitations. Paper at the craft store, my home printer and lots of time - but cheap. You can get DIY kits at Target, Michael's, and even ebay.

That's the major stuff, everything else is just crap people won't remember anyway. I think you mentioned that your son would be here in July. Will he still be here in September? I didn't catch that.

hmmm..maybe find a cheaper location to reside?


also curious why he is against a registry office wedding. I had one and it was lovely. In fact today is our 5th anniversary. Many of us on here had registry office weddings.

Happy anniversary Pebbles!  From one Chicagoan to another!

Well I just recently did this wedding stuff here's some money saving ideas.

Venue: Other than food and liquor this was our #1 expense. I second the registry office.

Dress: Ebay! Seriously. If you know the designer and the style of your dress look for it there. Also veils, tiaras, invites, etc.

Flowers: I did all my own flowers - bouquets, boutineers (learned how to do this from a website and practice), and the tables. I got my flowers online. I got mine from www.freshroses.com  I'm not sure if they ship internationally, but I'm sure there is flower supplier that does.

Photographer: If you could get his cousin that would be great. We gave out disposables to the guests to take pics. Also, lots of people will send you the digital pictures they took with their own cameras.

DJ: Do your own music. You could give this project to DF if he's into that stuff. Burn your own wedding CDs (iTunes or your own collection) and play on the stereo.

Cake: Making it yourself is a fabulous idea, but remember baking here is a different can of worms.

Food: IL's are they going to do the drinks as well? or BYOB? If you adjust the time of day you get married - say early afternoon then people won't drink as much - cheaper! I'm also a dork who loves wedding punch so you might be able to skip the frosty beverages, let people buy their own at the after party at the local pub.

Invites: I made our invitations. Paper at the craft store, my home printer and lots of time - but cheap. You can get DIY kits at Target, Michael's, and even ebay.

That's the major stuff, everything else is just crap people won't remember anyway. I think you mentioned that your son would be here in July. Will he still be here in September? I didn't catch that.

Great ideas I have definitely learned baking there is definitely a different can of worms! The hard way I might add

His family would never hear of not having the alcohol at the reception. Neither of us drink....Im not sure how to put this delicately...his family does So it cant be in short supply (ie a few bottles of wine or something wouldnt cut it). Im hoping then that the offer of food includes the alcohol, not to be assuming or rude tacky etc but we really cant afford a lot of alcohol and to be honest we dont care if theres any at the reception...

I am definitely making my way to hobby craft shortly after arrival

Ive also seriously thought of the disposable cameras as well, and there will be at least a couple of digi cams floating around, my fiance has a really nice one, wish I had it now for pics of my ring, my brothers just doesnt get it clear enough   Ive found places that have really good deals on theirs but I cant remember where

I forgot to mention my son will be there with me until the beginning of Sept...hed be due back the 4th...unless my ex would be willing to let him stay a bit longer to be in the wedding. I wont get married w/o my baby boy there.

Happy anniversary Pebbles!  From one Chicagoan to another!

Big Windy City thanx Geeta!! 


Just wanted to add my gown was a simple bridesmaids gown I bought from an online bridal shop for $69. Frank rented his suit for £60.

that was something I have been having trouble finding, just how much it will cost to rent dfs attire.


And happy anniversary! congrats on 5 years


I have found a couple of sellers on ebay that have been a great resource for other brides on another board I visit, one of them sells everything in £s and its all really reasonable prices, but I cant find the name anywhere

One of them though was angelsbridal. I'll post the other when I can find it...it may be in my history on the other comp..I hope so anyway I was planning on really looking through what was there :/

Great ideas I have definitely learned baking there is definitely a different can of worms! The hard way I might add

No!! Don't put worms in your wedding cake!!!

Your hubby is a hottie Ricki

Oh you behave! He's old enough to be your father! In fact he's old enough to be my father! lol  (j/k)


Anyway I saw some online bridal shops that sell used gowns so check that out also.
Our biggest expense was the food for our formal reception but we went as cheap as possible. We had a champagne toast instead of an open bar which saved us a fortune.
Our best man paid for the photographer. Our wedding car (new cream colored Jag w/driver) was free as my FIL retired from Jag. My SILs friend made our gorgeous wedding cake so we only paid like £45 for it. We had an evening reception also which was a casual dress disco. What we did here was pay£25 to rent a room at a social club hubby joined. My SIL did all the food (cold buffet) and my husbands friend brought loads of filled balloons and and a DJ.
Friends and relatives really come in handy when your planning a wedding on a budget. Dont be afraid to ask for help either!
We didnt have a lot of money at all to blow on a huge wedding 'show'. We had a few thousand £ we put down on our house. Also I have two sons I brought with me from the USA so thats another reason we didnt want to blow so much money on the wedding. The boys looked so cute in their little wedding suits (Soon to be on Ebay by the way). I got their suits from BHS.

Oh also learned hubby is quite the bartender. He made me a few nice screaming orgasms at our night reception. 

No!! Don't put worms in your wedding cake!!!

hee hee hee   

He made me a few nice screaming orgasms at our night reception. 

Whooooaaaa too much information Pebbles!!   

Ok I just realized that instead of making silly comments on other people's posts I should contribute something useful to this discussion - i.e. I just got married and also did it on the cheap (shall I mention again that DH is a STUDENT and has NO JOB??).

Some of these tips are not quite applicable since we had an Indian wedding AND it was in the US but hey a wedding's a wedding.  Well we had our outfits from India so no tips on the dress/tux thing.  We got our flowers from a large grocery store in the US that did them nicely - good enough for me so whatever.  I also had the big big wedding the first time around so my standards were a bit lower this time.   Everyone else got their own outfits of course.

We also had our reception at a restaurant which meant no rental fee for a hall/DJ/all that. That was both a style decision (DH wasn't that bothered about having the dancing and all) and a budgetary decision.  And similar to Aeonix my dad paid for the entire dinner which I was not planning on happening, but he wanted to seeing as he didn't pay for much the first time around.  That was a big help.  Then the photography - we found a relatively cheap guy who did a decent job, nothing spectacular, but solid work.  He saved us a lot of money by giving us the digital photos (didn't do any film) and a CD and said we could make our own album, prints, etc. 

What else...I did get my hair done but that wasn't bad.  Did my own makeup (unlike last time) and was much happier with the results this time.  Our biggest expense by far was we agreed to purchase plane tickets for my sister- and brother-in-law and their kids because they could not afford it (they are in Portland and had to come to Chicago).  It was very important to us that our siblings be present, and I agreed with DH that we needed to help them come as they are struggling to save and make ends meet.  So we did that and we went without some other big things...but the important thing is that you are married with your loved ones with you to celebrate.  So we didn't mind.

Whooooaaaa too much information Pebbles!!   

LOL sorry. i forgot I have to be careful when using the word orgasm around here but the really were orgasms the drink not an orgasm orgasm. 


I forgot about the flowers hair and make-up like Geeta mentioned.
MY SIL did the flowers which explains the horrible bouquet but like I said that was the only thing that went wrong. I did my own make up the same as I do everyday no biggie. My hair I had done at an old lady salon and paid about £12 for.
There are so many ways to cut corners when you are on a wedding budget!

Geeta made me think of a few more things. If you can't get his cousin to do the photos, I know someone who got a photgraphy student from the local uni that was very reasonable. They could do digital pics and let you print your own.

Another place to look for your dress is www. pearlsplace.com.

Or, unrealistically, you could call on Stella McCartney, who's been given a  year to get her s--t together by the fashion house that sponsors her. Her sales are low. Poor Stella. How WILL she survive?

DH and I had a relatively low budget wedding and it was lovely.....here's how I saved money --

Since you're still in the US, check out www.bridesave.com for your dress.  I bought my dress from them and saved quite a lot over what they wanted in the bridal salon.  The cheapest thing to do is look for a white or ivory bridesmaid dress as they're rarely more than $300 or so.  Bridesave lets you search by colour, length, size, fabric, etc., so it's a really quick way to find what you want.

Flowers -- go artificial.  I know some think it's tacky, but whatever...I still have my bouquet and love it.  I went to a local pottery and bought a ton of flowers for about $70 -- enough to do my bouquet, 2 bridesmaid bouquets, 3 corsages, 7 bouts, decorations for the head table, and the altar.  If you're even remotely crafty, you can arrange the flowers and make the bouquets/corsages/bouts yourself.

Invitations -- I bought nice paper and nice hydrangea stamps and inks and made all of our paper goods (invitations, save the dates, response cards, menus, programs) on the computer.  I probably spent about $20 total.

Bridemaid gifts/jewelery -- www.bluemud.com  As part of their gifts, I gave my bridesmaids, mom, and grandmother silver charm bracelets that I assembled using the charms and bracelets from this site.  The prices are fantastic, and so is the quality and service.

Hair and makeup -- did it myself.

Tiara -- made it myself with a cheap headband, some gold wire, and glass beads.  It took a couple of hours and cost about $20.

Church -- we were married in the church my family has attended for years and years.  Since my parents and grandparents are members, we could use the church for about $50, which included the sound technician.

Music (church) -- I burned CDs of the ceremony music...the sound tech just let them go.  Sounded great and cost nothing!

Reception venue -- Think about the organisations your family/fiance's family work with/belong to and see if you can use their venue for free or for a reduced rate.  My stepdad was in the military so we were able to hold the reception at the officer's club, which was nicer but less expensive than the hotels in town.  I think the total cost for the hall, the food, and the alcohol was about $2000.

Cake -- seek out a hidden talent.  We found our cake lady through word of mouth.  The cake was lovely, yummy, and cost about $200.  I baked the groom's cake (trad English fruitcake) myself.  That cost about $100, due to the expensive ingredients, alcohol, marzipan, etc.

Would it be an option for you to get married in the US?  In my opinion, it's much easier to do a wedding on a budget in the US.  Have a cheap wedding there, then a nice reception here once you're settled.