safely back in Florida (ramblings)

I have been back in the States for going on 60+hrs. Everything has been different since the departure gate at Gatwick, when all the American accents sounded strange and unpleasant.
You'd think I'd been away much longer than 4 and a half months.

I miss my sweetie.
We made the best of our last days together and he saw me safely to security at Gatwick.
I have had 2 emails and 1 phonecall from him since getting "home".
It's all so confusing.
I miss him, I miss our daily routine.  But I know I have to get on with moving forward in my own life...not pressuring him to make a decision on our future.
He is transitioning (seeking a new better job) and I am transitioning (building the career I've always wanted).

The only decision we have made concerning US is that we will keep in touch. He has called this separation a "break" and said he hopes to come visit once he saves up some money...
We both need to do a lot of thinking on whether we could live together happily given our lifestyle differences.
But those things seem so small and insignificant when you're 3000 miles apart and lonely.

I'm glad that you got home safely and that you two are still in contact.  Maybe when you both start making some personal/career progress your prospective on things will be more clear.  I just hope that you end up with whatever makes you happiest. 

Uptea,

My prayers go out to you.  I am gonna offer my ear and heart to listen to your story, so if you want to PM me and just know that I will listen and not judge you or give any unwanted advice.  I have been in a similiar situation as you and that is all I wanted was someone to listen to me during my difficult time, so I am offering you my friendship as well as a shoulder to cry on if you so need it.

thanks to both of you
I do think it will take some time and movement on various levels to see if we are cut off for a life together
I love him, we had such a deep strong connection so quickly...
But when we moved in together (as many of you will remember) we found out we have some big differences in the way we go about daily life, the way we like our environment (living space) arranged...and so on.

I have to get myself rested, back on a healthy daily schedule, and start working on my career...
keep him in my heart and thoughts
and wait to see what happens

just a "side note", if you believe in this sort of thing...the lady who lives next door to us here in FL does tarot readings and gets "flashes" of insight into the future and she told my housemates here that this relationship has only just begun...

I truly believe everything happens for a reason.  Sometimes those reasons are clear at first.  I know it's difficult and I'm sorry.

just a "side note", if you believe in this sort of thing...the lady who lives next door to us here in FL does tarot readings and gets "flashes" of insight into the future and she told my housemates here that this relationship has only just begun...

I don't really believe in fortune telling, but I do believe that some things are just too strange to be explained by coincidence and that it is possible to fall in love right away.  When my husband was a teenager he wrote something about the person who would be the love of his life  and used an obscure word for love/attraction to describe her feelings toward him.  That was the first word I used to tell him how I felt (very very soon after meeting).  Apparently it freaked him out a bit, but he told me about it later and even showed me the book he used to keep.  If he didn't still have his book I would have thought he made it up.  Our secret word is engraved in his wedding ring. 

Soooo...back to the original thread - care to tell us anything about this career you'll be pursuing?  (Just being nosy, you don't need to).

UP4tea, Really glad to hear that you made it home safely.

I am sure you're having a very difficult time right now and I truly hope things work out the way you wish them to.

My 2 cents, if the difficulties were mainly surrounding the inconveniences of living together, and providing you truly love each other, you'll get through it.

I wish you all the best...

just a "side note", if you believe in this sort of thing...the lady who lives next door to us here in FL does tarot readings and gets "flashes" of insight into the future and she told my housemates here that this relationship has only just begun...

When my husband was a teenager he wrote something about the person who would be the love of his life  and used an obscure word for love/attraction to describe her feelings toward him.  That was the first word I used to tell him how I felt (very very soon after meeting).  Apparently it freaked him out a bit, but he told me about it later and even showed me the book he used to keep.  If he didn't still have his book I would have thought he made it up.  Our secret word is engraved in his wedding ring. 

I love stories like that.  At some point when my DH was taking French classes...he'd scribbled the phrase 'Ma femme Caroline' (my wife Caroline) in his notebook -- something they were learning in class or maybe the teacher had said the phrase & he copied it down.  When we started dating, he happened to find that notebook again & opened it up to the page where he had previously written 'Ma femme Caroline' -- he had to do a double take 'cause it freaked him out.

up4tea -- I'm going to be in Tampa Bay soon!  We're staying in Tarpon Springs this time while visiting friends, etc.  I can't wait to go to Publix!  One time I got one of their enormous deli sandwiches for DH & I - he couldn't believe how big that sandwich was...and I think it took us two days to eat it.  I said something to him awhile back about getting one of those sandwiches again & he said we could eat on it the entire time we're there!  LOL

I am glad to hear you got safely back home, but I am sorry to hear your story.  It was one of the first few threads here that really attracted my interest.  I hope you are taking care and mending your hurt a little.  As others have said, I have had a very similar situation happen before.  It's really nice you can let it out and have a support group here.  Please let me know if I can help by listening or anything else you might need that I can provide.  Best of luck and sending positive thoughts your way.

PS I have a deck of tarot cards.  I mostly use them as party tricks and for fun, but I've gotten a few things really right, so your neighbor maybe right!   

thanks to everyone who has come in to offer support, encouragement, and good wishes...
I am really really missing my sweetie tonite. I was lying in bed ready to turn out the light and suddenly thought to check my email and there was a new msg from him.
He sounds good...like he is getting on w/life. Which I suppose is good. But it would have been nice to hear him say he misses me, or loves me   Maybe he thinks he's trying to make it easier on me. I just still wish I knew what was really going on in his head/heart.
He said he would ring me on Saturday...and right now I don't have any idea what to say without bursting into tears. And I do not want to sound desperate or needy or pushy. I want to sound like I am fine and getting on with my life, too.
And in some ways I guess I am. I mean, I am doing things...going shopping and out w/my housemates (we went to Lord of the Dance tonite). But I am just always wishing I'd wake up in his arms... :\\\'(

okay I gotta stop there
If anyone can give me suggestions what to talk about besides weather and how much I miss him, please tell me!

I will check in again sometime tomorrow

I am sorry I don't have any suggestions for you, I know how hard it is. Just wanted to offer my support and hugs. I hope things look up for you very soon! 

thanks to everyone who has come in to offer support, encouragement, and good wishes...
I am really really missing my sweetie tonite. I was lying in bed ready to turn out the light and suddenly thought to check my email and there was a new msg from him.
He sounds good...like he is getting on w/life. Which I suppose is good. But it would have been nice to hear him say he misses me, or loves me   Maybe he thinks he's trying to make it easier on me. I just still wish I knew what was really going on in his head/heart.
He said he would ring me on Saturday...and right now I don't have any idea what to say without bursting into tears. And I do not want to sound desperate or needy or pushy. I want to sound like I am fine and getting on with my life, too.
And in some ways I guess I am. I mean, I am doing things...going shopping and out w/my housemates (we went to Lord of the Dance tonite). But I am just always wishing I'd wake up in his arms... :\\\'(

okay I gotta stop there
If anyone can give me suggestions what to talk about besides weather and how much I miss him, please tell me!

I will check in again sometime tomorrow

If I were you, I'd forget about him and not even talk to him. 

Wow, this sounds alot like what I went through. Hang in there.

Things have a way of working out the way they should. Hang in there and be good to yourself. Best of luck with it all.