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Topic: Are we nuts  (Read 1993 times)

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Are we nuts
« on: January 02, 2004, 10:41:36 PM »
My husband and I are hoping to move to the UK in the spring, to where we are not sure yet. Both sets of our parents we born and raised in the UK(my mother from Scotland my father from Wales) my husband's father from England so we are able to obtain the needed documents which will let us live and work there, the question is are we nuts? We live in Missouri in a very nice house, my husband has an excellent above average paying job as and engineer and I am able to stay at home to raise our three year old daughter. Every now and again we get this urge to give it all up and move just to experience a different lifestlye, different culture and enjoy the scenery. We both understand the quality of life is quite a bit different and the salaries are much lower, I guess what I am wanting to know is how much money do you need to make to live comfortably each month on an average. I will be staying at home will I need a car or is everything fairly easy to get to (groceries, health club, dance class, doctor.....) My husband has started his job search over the internet, we are up in the air as to if he should continue searching over the net or if he should go over on his own first find a job and then we will follow after (sounds risky to me), does anyone have any experiences to share or any advice for us on any of the questions that I have asked. I apoligize this posting is more like a chapter in a novel but any advice would be  helpful.
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                                                            Cad


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Re: Are we nuts
« Reply #1 on: January 02, 2004, 10:57:03 PM »
I don't have much to share - other than you're not nuts! Not even close! :) One of the things I love about being pregnant with our half English half American child is knowing that one day when he's old enough he can just pick up and emigrate if he feels like it... what a blessing! Especially to those of us who had to get here through fiancee/spouse/work/student visa etc... the idea of him sailing through and having the chance to live in another country is just... it makes me giddy. Like I'm providing him with something that other parents can't. :) I hope one day he feels like you do, and wants to just go and experience *because he can*!

Of course it's risky, especially with the job situation, so I don't really know what to tell you. It totally depends on which industry he's in. As far as moving here without a job, you'd have to have one of two things (in my humble opinion): either someone to live with until you had enough money to get your own place, or a lot of money coming into the country (like from the sale of a US house) to start off. The cost of living *is* high here, no matter where you are. Certainly higher than it is in Missouri. As for driving, that completely depends on where you live as well. Where I live, it's fine not driving. I can walk to everything. Some cities have great internal public transport as well. But the villages & smaller towns, you can be really screwed without a car.  :-/  

Sorry if that wasnt any practical help. ;) But good luck with your search!
I'm done moving. Unrepatriated back to the UK, here for good!

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Re: Are we nuts
« Reply #2 on: January 02, 2004, 11:17:15 PM »
Thank-you so much Marlespo , I feel just the same as you do and I feel very fortunate that my parents gave that to me I would be foolish not to take advantage of it. I am hoping to give my daughter a very diverse and cultured life as well and what better way to do it then go straight back to our family roots.


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Re: Are we nuts
« Reply #3 on: January 04, 2004, 05:19:15 PM »
You might want to read the book "Third Culture Kids". I was a third culture kid and wanted to expose my own son to the same life experiences because I felt I had gained so much growing up in different cultures.

As far as living here in the UK, I feel as though I can make a difference. Being in the US, it's so big and vast...you become almost swallowed up. But where my husband and I are, a small town, we know people and know that what we contribute to town life makes a difference to others. I'm so proud of the work my husband does and it feels like it helps so many in so many different ways. I don't think we'd feel the same in the US. Hard to explain.
Married to Graham, we run our own open-source computer training company in beautiful Wiltshire out of our 1814 Georgian Regency home (a former lodging house and once featured in Antiques Roadshow)


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Re: Are we nuts
« Reply #4 on: January 05, 2004, 12:21:56 AM »
For me, it has always been about making sure that I have no regrets about not doing something I wanted to.  I left the US when I was 18.  I grew up in a small town in Iowa where people had lived in the town for generations.  I knew I didn't want that.  If I had stayed, I would have regretted it.

It is going to be rough if you do decide to come.  I feel the quality of life is on a completely different scale and to some people it feels like the quality of life is worse here.  It can be really tough moving over and you could be absolutely broke.  However, if you don't take the chance are you going to wonder about it for the rest of your life?  If you don't like it you can always go back...

Good luck and let us know what you decide.

Kat
"It doesn't matter what you do in the bedroom as long as you don't do it in the street and frighten the horses."   Mrs Patrick Campbell (1865-1940) English Actress


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Re: Are we nuts
« Reply #5 on: January 05, 2004, 02:36:42 AM »
Thank-you for sharing some experiences with us, it really helps alot. We get really excited thinking about coming to the UK and can hardly wait to get there and then the next morning we wake up with second thoughts, should we just stay in the US and play it safe where we a live very comfortable life  or do we go out on a limb and walk into the unknown  . I think alot like you in the fact that if we don't come to see what it is like we will regret it for the rest of our lives and we always promised each other that we would not be the type of people who stay in one place for security, but live life to the fullest and experience and enjoy it each and everyday.


Re: Are we nuts
« Reply #6 on: January 05, 2004, 09:24:50 PM »
Cad, the first step you should both take if you haven't already, is to visit there.  Maybe for a month if possible, just to get a feel for the country.  You may find you absolutely love it more than you could've imagined, or you may decide that it wasn't what you'd hoped/expected.  You also might love it but realize there are things about the country that you know you couldn't/wouldn't want to live with.  A visit there might sway your decision one way or the other.  

If you're still undecided, think about what's important to you and what you're willing to give up and what you're not.  

If you know you want a large house and a big car and don't think you'd be happy having to give those up, having to pay more for less.. then you might want to stay put.  

If you do visit and fall in love with the place, start researching where you might like to live.  Figure out what's important to you and what fits your criteria.  

I've known people who've moved there and never looked back, and people who've been miserable every single day spent there.  Chances are, you'll fall somewhere in the middle.  Love it some days, hate it others (if in fact you do decide to go).

I would just say.. if you think you want to move there, really try to research/discover more about it before totally changing your life, especially if you're already quite happy and settled.  

KatGold's makes a good point though.. even if you do move and then find you can't tolerate it, you can always move back.


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Re: Are we nuts
« Reply #7 on: January 22, 2004, 03:18:52 PM »
I agree!  You are definately not nuts! I came here because my grandfather was Irish and under the EU I can live and work anywhere in Europe.  Anywhere in Europe!  That is such a great oppurtunity and I am so lucky to have it.  I love England so far, it's been fascinating learning all the lingo and little differences.  I am so glad I dropped everything and moved here.  Nothing is permanent, you can always pick up and move back to the states if it doesn't suit your fancy or you can go somewhere else and try that on as well.  It gives such a nice perspective on how the rest of the world lives.  I recommend the move.


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Re: Are we nuts
« Reply #8 on: February 09, 2004, 10:23:49 AM »
Quote
We both understand the quality of life is quite a bit different and the salaries are much lower, I guess what I am wanting to know is how much money do you need to make to live comfortably each month on an average.                   
                                                            Cad

In response to the above, this is very dependent on where you decide to move to. You will need a lot more money in say London, than say a small village in the north. In short, England is the opposite to the US, as property prices in the southeast generally exceed those in the north.

The big issue in England concerning the quality of living is the affordability of housing, so there is no straight answer to your question. It really depends where you live. I would recommend that you have a  look at:

www.rightmove.co.uk and www.fish4homes.co.uk

In terms of salaries, generally speaking, $1 spends the same as 1 GBP. For example, if one makes $40,000 in America, you would have pretty much the same buying power as 40,000 GBP. I like the Gap Jeans example I saw posted somewhere else--if a pair of Gap jeans sells for $19.99 in the US, it usually sells for 19.99 GBP in the UK.

On the basis that you have the finances available to make the move and your husband can command the required salary based on your housing requirements, my only advice would be not to burn all bridges in the US if all possible (i.e. renting your house instead of selling it).

This plan also coincides with the fact that the dollar is at an all time low. If you do have equity in your house and other money behind you, it will transfer into the lowest amount of Pound Sterling in the last 10 years.

If you do decide that you love it in England and wish to settle there, and the delay of sale of your house has cost you some money, that may be made up if the dollar recovers.

In short, a move to England can be very rewarding. As stated, it would be a different experience and adventure all together. Having Europe on your doorstep is great for weekend trips, etc. We can thoroughly recommend Paris for a weekend. It does make a refreshing change to have different cultures and architecture within a couple of hours of plane ride as opposed to the same old same old you get in the US.

As someone has already said, there are things that might have to be compromised (i.e. large house and car), but the experiences that can be had can make up for those things.

Hope this helps (my husband and I have been over the pros and cons of each country many times as I am sure many members have).

Jenny (with some help from husband Andy who added a couple of opinions to this post)


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