Tired of Saying Goodbye

Oh Peeps~  What a sweetheart your man is to leave you all those notes...British men, aren't they just the most romantic?

Well I thought of another thing that Steven and I do.  I have a bear from the Bear Factory, Oliver.  Steven gave me him on my first meeting with him, and he is very cherished.  Anyhow, Steven also gave me a mostly used up bottle of one of his fave colognes and I gave him some of my perfume.  I spray Oliver with the cologne before getting into bed and can smell him next to me.  Perhaps exchange perfumes or buy some of the cologne he wears?  They say smell is one of the strongest memories, and I believe it with all of my heart.

Lots of pictures around the room also help.  I have a little shrine set up in honor of my guy...pathetic I know, but seeing his face makes me a bit happier.

I almost got sick at miami internation last week because he and i were both on different planes, him back to london and me back to Boston.  We are fortunate and blow our $$ and vacation time on monthly visits, but that's only for 3-4 days at a time.  

I'll never forget my engagement weekend and then he had to leave.  I had a beautiful ring i would have turned in that second to be with him.

But now i'm counting down the months till we're together permanently (6 months, 4 days) and I only wish you the best.

Lots of pictures around the room also help.  I have a little shrine set up in honor of my guy...pathetic I know, but seeing his face makes me a bit happier.

I was the same way.  In fact the first time Phil came to the house and saw my room, he was so embarrassed!  Only now I don't know quite what to do with all the framed photos, as I have him all the time and he's too modest to let me put them up in the house!  

OMG krissybelle, i do the SAME thing.  I have a bear with a union jack jumper from harrods and DF gave me a little of his Paco Rabanne colognue.  I put it on him when his smell runs out!

I have to say, i found this great thing here in a gift shop.  IT's a puzzle that's flat and you write/decorate it and send it to your beloved in pieces.  They have to put it together and read the message.  He loved it, although one corner piece was missing when he got it.  

Oh Peeps~  .British men, aren't they just the most romantic?

I really believe they ARE! My sweetie left me little post-its all over also, plus a magnet on my fridge and a book. No American man even came close to the romantic he is.

 They say smell is one of the strongest memories, and I believe it with all of my heart.

Oh, I agree. I made him leave clothes behind the first time he visited, and I keep a shirt under my pillow so I can smell him!

Anyone else listen to the old voicemails, too??


Oh, and I agree. Airports suck. :'(

I made glenn leave behind a tshirt or two as well when he first came over to the states to see me (covered with his cologn of course) and I left a few things here when I came to visit him the first time.

Every few weeks I receive a package from my honey...and he always sends me a freshly worn shirt. I keep it under my pillow during the day, and hug it close to me at night (my nose stuck right in the armpit!) When I get a new shirt, the previous one becomes my night shirt and the new one becomes my cuddly! I am in my late 30's...in fact I turned 39 yesterday...and NEVER had a "blankie" when I was a toddler or done anything like this before! Sometimes I feel sooooo silly, but I don't care! When we visit, I give him back his pile of t-shirts to "recycle." (Of course he has some of my things too...which he doesn't wear!)

I got back "home" yesterday (after midnight...what an ordeal!) from a month-long visit in the UK. I knew it would be harder after such an extended stay...I just didn't realize HOW hard! Coming back on my birthday (emotional "taking stock" day anyway) with jet lag (and two 3 year-olds with jet lag) was not good planning on my part...I have been totally "out of sorts." It was good visiting for a longer time though...more like day to day life with him working a lot (before, when I visited there, I went without my children...so he took several days off or worked from home in the am while I was still slumbering upstairs and there was nonstop sightseeing, eating out, drinking and unlimited "lovey-time") and even though there were some "tense" times with the twins, especially at the beginning when I wondered if they would ever adjust to the time and go to bed before midnight, it was good to know we make a great team dealing with "real life" issues.

But...right now I am going through this "shell shock" stage...the numbness, the disorientation. I guess you all know what I am talking about: I have so much of him here with me, so much of myself is there with him and I feel him so close, that my body refuses to accept that I can't just get up from typing this, go into the other room and touch him physically...it seems so unreal at times!

Guess I will survive!

Hope you're all well...geally

(Shel, it was great talking with you on the phone...next time we WILL get together!)

Terinth, all I can say is HANG IN THERE. I know that nothing anyone can say can take away the pain of having to leave your loved one behind. The one thing that kept me going was that we sorted everything out pretty quickly but of course, every couple needs to go at their own pace and everyone's circumstances are different. Just try and be strong, we're all here for you  

Every few weeks I receive a package from my honey...and he always sends me a freshly worn shirt. I keep it under my pillow during the day, and hug it close to me at night (my nose stuck right in the armpit!) When I get a new shirt, the previous one becomes my night shirt and the new one becomes my cuddly! I am in my late 30's...in fact I turned 39 yesterday...and NEVER had a "blankie" when I was a toddler or done anything like this before! Sometimes I feel sooooo silly, but I don't care! When we visit, I give him back his pile of t-shirts to "recycle." (Of course he has some of my things too...which he doesn't wear!)


  I do the same thing ..I put one of his shirts over my pillow case so I can wrap my arms around it and pretend it's him I'm hugging  :'( I miss him so much at times it makes me crazy . I have pictures of him ALL over my house in everyroom  but the bath   he's everywere I turn and I love to look at him .he has things of mine as well and he even has some of my perfume so he to can refersh my smell as well ..& I'm almost 41 so I don't feel it's silly it's just REAL LOVE   the best kind .......I'm lucky in that we do get to talk on the phone atleast 3 times a day if not more I'd NEVER make it with out that ...

 Oh I have about 6 to 8 more weeks before he's here again !! I can't wait   haven't been together sense late august .
best wishes to you all   Wild

I was the same way.  In fact the first time Phil came to the house and saw my room, he was so embarrassed!  Only now I don't know quite what to do with all the framed photos, as I have him all the time and he's too modest to let me put them up in the house!  

we were the same! we both had little shrines to each other with pics and candles ... we still have most of the pics around our flat now and i have a new shrine at work (but without the candles!)

i really feel for all of you who are separated by distance and circumstances...stay strong guys you will get there in the end!!

Terinth, all I can say is HANG IN THERE. I know that nothing anyone can say can take away the pain of having to leave your loved one behind. The one thing that kept me going was that we sorted everything out pretty quickly but of course, every couple needs to go at their own pace and everyone's circumstances are different. Just try and be strong, we're all here for you  

Thanks Mrs Kev.. Sean is back here with me now  Well.. until April 20th anyway.  I shouldn't have as hard a time when he next leaves, because I'll be going to England just 2 and a bit weeks later  I think the excitement of getting to be there again will keep me going.  

Thanks for the warm wishes.

Every few weeks I receive a package from my honey...and he always sends me a freshly worn shirt. I keep it under my pillow during the day, and hug it close to me at night (my nose stuck right in the armpit!) When I get a new shirt, the previous one becomes my night shirt and the new one becomes my cuddly! I am in my late 30's...in fact I turned 39 yesterday...

I'm 40, and I do the same thing(including smelling the armpits!) Good to know it's not just me-maybe I'll feel less silly now.

..the numbness, the disorientation. I guess you all know what I am talking about

Know exactly what you're talking about. Those are perfect words to describe the feeling, other than just sadness, of course.

Just got back from my week long visit with Steven and my heart is broken.  I'm not exaggerating one bit either.  So sad it's unbelievable!!!  I have a pain in my chest much like heartburn, but I know it's just the pain of leaving him behind.  It took all the effort I had to get myself on that plane and actually leave...I wanted to run back through security and chase after him.  I didn't want to leave him.

I don't want to have to leave anymore...it's too hard.  Just want the happily ever after part to get here already.

Ok, I'm gonna go have a good cry and try to get some sleep. :'(

(((KRISSY)))  

I can empathize with you...I've been home 1 1/2 weeks and it still is painful for me. This time around it was harder leaving, I think because it was a longer stay. AND...I almost DID run back through security...had that "fight or flight" feeling come over me. If I hadn't had the twins with me I probably would have, but I had them to concentrate on.

So, for the first few days, each day was marked with "It has been such and such a time since we last kissed at the airport and I want to go back to that point and not leave." But, now it has gotten to the point where I can mark the passing of days with "I have already survived 10 days towards our next visit," which in our case will most likely not be a visit, but our move (unless I sneak in a short visit again without the kids before our exodus.)

I feel for you though. Take good care of yourself.

Vicki

Thanks, Geally.  I'm kind of suffering a bit of jetlag I guess since I'm up at 5:30 am....lol.  I just want to run back to the airport and fly back to him.  I'm so not the kind of person who is spontaneous, but thought about throwing away my education and just moving there right now...of course we weren't really going to do that, but we discussed it.  Have thought about finishing in May and moving right over, but then even though I'd have a degree it wouldn't be a full-fledged education one, so that might be a dumb choice as well.  I guess I know a lot of other people have held out much longer than me, but it's just getting so hard.

Deep down I know that I should just finish school, and that we should save up more money for my visas and move, but I want to just find a way to scrape together the money now for the visas, and make it up as we go along.  We'd struggle, but you know, it seems worth it just now.  Anyhow, I know I'm rambling, but I feel like I just needed to get out some of the emotion.  Steven and I exchange books that we write in, and I must have filled in at least ten pages yesterday in the various airports waiting to get on my flights.  I have so much emotion in me right now, but can't quite get it out...you know?

I guess I should listen to what his dad said about it all....I know you're sick about leaving just now, but it's just how it has to be for now.  Guess he's right, it just has to be this way for the time being.  Even though what he said seems a bit depressing, it was much more comforting than hearing "you'll be back before you know it" etc.  Those sorts of phrases are nice and all, but don't really help.  A few months may not seem like a long time to someone not in a LDR, but those of you in one know it seems like ages.

Ok I really am rambling....will try to go back to sleep.