this is lame, but...

...i find that the closer the time comes that im going to see my beloved, the harder it is to get through the days without thinking "i would do ANYTHING to just have five minutes with him right now".  

It seems foolish, but before when i knew it would be months until i saw him again, yes it was terrible!  but somehow i was able to keep certain thoughts out of my mind about desperatly missing him.  I would just let the time pass, and pass it does.

But just as in the weeks before he came to visit me in Florida, once again I find myself in just complete and utter heartbreak to be apart.  The thing is, Im moving there in hopefully just four weeks!  It should be a peice of cake!  I sent off for my visa yesterday and now the wheels are turning and things are coming into place, but even knowing that in a few weeks we won't have to say goodbye again, Im not patient enough.

I know this is lame because there are so many people that arn't as fortunate as I to be able to be with their love in only four short weeks, but its so hard... :'(

Lou~  it's not lame, I know what you mean exactly.  I will see my fiance in less than two weeks now, and I miss him more than ever.  I think when the time gets closer to actually seeing them, the more you realize just how much you need them and miss them and it's just so close you can taste it.  When the time gets closer, the plane ticket is like a million dollars being waved repeatedly in front of your face and then jerked away time and time again.  It's because it's so close that it makes it all the harder.  The goal seems right there, you're almost there, so you just don't want to wait another couple of weeks...you want to be there NOW!!!!  

You're not silly or lame, you're normal.  Big hugs and congrats on getting to move over there so soon.  I can't wait till next year to move over, even though I know I'll be really sad to leave here. :'(

Krissybell said it pretty good...and I am sure many of us feel the same...  for 2 years, Tom and I did not see each other for 11 month stretches...  it was horrible in the beginning...then as time went on, our daily lives picked up its regular pace and we became settled in the acknowledgement that it would be months before we would be together again... As the time drew nearer, the excitement and the knowing of being able to kiss, hold hands and just feel each others warmth takes hold...and with that comes the longing and desire to be together right at that moment.

Tom and I have been inseperable for 4 months now that I am here in England... the past waiting and frustration seems already to be eons ago...we are making a home together and life has gone back to our daily life routines...except this time, when he walks in the door every evening from work...we can kiss, hold each others hand and feel each others warmth... so in essence... the longing is still there and always will be...but instead of 11 months of waiting...there is only 9 hours of it...

I know it is difficult...but do your best to enjoy what time you have left with your family and friends...for soon you will be having a different longing for them...it helps to pass the time...and gives everyone else you love some good quality time with you. For the last few months at home...I did my best to accept every invitation to spend with family and friends...and it helped a lot.

Big Hugs to all that are in the last waiting months to be with their love for good... and Special Hugs for all that still have a long wait in front of them.

oh kirssy and mfredericka - thank you SO much.  your words are very comforting.  I had thought I was being odd for it to seem so hard when we are so close to being together.  when i was trying to send my documents up to new york and left work at my lunch hour to go find a fedex location to send it up and i got there and they were closed for another hour, it was so weird.  i started to cry!   :'( i just wanted to get the documents sent up there and have them get there asap.  so i went back to work, emailed my sweatheart and he reminded me that after all we've been through, one more day won't make a difference in the scheme of things.  I left work early and still got it mailed that day.

The hard thing is that I only have my mom here, who I talk to a lot, but the rest of my family and all my friends are in Maine, while Im isolated here in Florida.  After work I have a hard time amusing myself here and I just watch tv and scour the internet for things that have to do with moving.  jobs, flats, anything.  Thankfully my dad is coming down to FLA on holiday and Im leaving today to go and spend the weekend with him!  yay!  It will be the last time i see him for a while and we have SO much to talk about.  And Im so grateful for this site, there is so much support from people who have been through the process and its AMAZING.  At first I felt silly posting this, but now Im glad I did.
*thank you thank you*

Anytime, Lou.  I hope you have a wonderful visit with your dad.  So glad we were able to help you, even if it was just a little bit of help.

 Another (((Hug))) from me Lou,and third the sentiment that you are not foolish in how your feeling in any way!Your just very excited to be with your sweetie.

 Gosh I thought I was going to go bonkers the last few weeks waiting for Gordon when he came over to the states for  the first time. I have always been "a leg shaker" and I remember siting at my desk at work with my leg constantly going! LOL.,trying to concentrate on my work ...forget it

 I agree with Shel,and as I told you last night just spend as much time with your loved ones as possible.It does help for in the future!

 When I met Gordy at the airport,not only did we stand there and hug like nobody's business  ,I also wanted to pinch him to make sure that yes he really there for real.

and third the sentiment

And I fourth it, dear Lou.

Love can hurt like hell at times, but oh, isn't it worth it!

Howard, with avuncular hugs.

Holy cow, it's like i have ants in my pants the closer David's visists (or mine to him) get.  I get mean, cranky, snappy.  I can't talk to him on the phone as it makes me even more antsy.  I drive my roomates nuts because i don't want to talk and i whine and shut myself into my room and sleep, so the next day will come and bring us closer!

Thus is the nature of the beast methinks.  Just know you're not alone.....and these tough times may seem like they will never end but they will.......someday!

They will end Aimiloo...trust me!  LOL, Sometimes I do not know what to do with myself because I am not getting frustrated or over anxious anymore for the time to come to move and be with Tom... since I can not work yet... my days are as being a housewife...  and trust me on this too...if you are use to working every day for the better part of your life...no matter how much you can think of doing around the house...you become antsy even being with your loved one...

I ahve about 8 months to go to be with Kevin in England and as I think about it it really isn't that long. I know that what you are going through is natural. I get very antsy before we see each other (and we see each other every 4-6 weeks).

You aren't the only one! Just think - every day the clock ticks down and you will be with him very soon!  

like now.  i'm seeing him on friday and all i can do is be mean and silent on the phone.

i am SUCH a bad fiancee!!!!!

He knows how i get though, so it's ok......it's only cause i love him so!