Engagement ring question

I was having coffee with fellow UK-Yer today and we were talking about engagement rings. How much does one typically spend on an engagement ring? Neither of us have a clue and what I thought was reasonable she thought was a bit pricey. We were curious and she suggested posting the question on here! Any thoughts? How does one go about deciding how much to spend?

That depends entirely on what the person can afford and/or is willing to pay.  When my mom found that out how much my engagement and wedding rings cost, she nearly fainted but compared to other people's rings,they are not that expensive.  It's all relative.

June

We spent what we could afford and felt comfortable spending.

We're students so don't make much money- my engagement ring is white gold/blue topaz and FH spent about £125 on it.  Any more than that would have been something we really couldn't afford.  If we were both in jobs making a more comfortable salary, we would have spent probably up to £300.  I personally wouldn't have been willing to spend more than that even if I could have afforded to.

FH's engagement ring by the way was much less expensive than mine, since it was sterling silver instead of gold, bought on eBay.  But he loves it.

The wedding band (14K white gold and diamonds) that I have my eye on is £200...hopefully we can afford it.  But I don't plan to spend more than that and quite possibly it will be less.

We spent nothing - my engagement ring belonged to my great aunt and my wedding ring belonged to my mother-in-law's mother - one ring from either side of the family.

i've "heard" this ridicolous idea that the engangement ring should be 1 to 2 times the monthly salary of the guy.  i find that ludercrious!

i've "heard" this ridicolous idea that the engangement ring should be 1 to 2 times the monthly salary of the guy.  i find that ludercrious!

I think DeBeer's is the one who started the whole "3 months salary" thing. That's no surprise!

Interesting question.  I didn't get an engagement ring but that is because I was adamant that I didn't want one (I break things, really, I do) and I knew that once I was married, it would rarely see the light of day.  However, my wedding band is worth £2000, but, DH only paid £370 for it because it has my grandmother's diamonds and gold, but was redesigned to fit my style.

But, basically, I think it is a variable thing.  It isn't the price that counts, really, it is the sentiment.  It is also something that should fit the style of the wearer.  If the woman is ga ga over diamonds, then diamonds it should be, thus making the price higher. If the woman adores sapphires, then that is what it should be and the price would be less.

In the end, it should cost what the man can afford, in my opinion.  Some say it should be 2 months salary, but, I think so much more goes into the whole decision than just cost.

Just my two cents/pence....

Well the jewelry industry, at least in the States, always advertises on that you should expect to spend about two months' salary on an engagement ring.  Whatever!  LOL!  (cross-posted)

I think it's an individual thing really.  My engagement ring was pricey - but it's also unique.  We bought a loose pear-shaped diamond in Antwerp, and then designed the ring ourselves with the help of a jewelry designer here in the UK.  Still it was not two months' salary (for DH), but maybe one.

My husband and I actually didn't get an engagement ring until after we were married (in November 2000) and went to the States for Christmas. Jewelry is SO much cheaper there. I've always heard and read that a man should invest six weeks' worth of salary on an engagement ring. But obviously, that depends on your circumstances. We got our wedding bands here, but it wasn't nearly as expensive as any diamond is. Wait until you go to the States to get an engagement ring. You'll get more for the money, and it's much more affordable.

It also depends on your values. I don't particularly value things. DH was quite shocked when I happily suggested that we get the simple .25 carrat cluster that cost £120. I didn't need him to buy something expensive to prove to me that he loved me...he did that all the time already. The funny thing was that he wanted to keep looking after we saw this one. While we were looking we grabbed a bite to eat at a pub in the West End. He laughed that our lunch cost a third of what my ring would.

We have had this conversation a few times, but if we won the lottery we wouldn't spend any of it on upgrading our rings. And the funny thing is that I have gotten compliments from some very posh people on my ring.

Interesting question.  I didn't get an engagement ring but that is because I was adamant that I didn't want one (I break things, really, I do) and I knew that once I was married, it would rarely see the light of day. 

Haha, my engagement ring rarely sees the light of day now!  It's a gorgeous ring, but the setting is quite high up so it keeps snagging on things...and I can be clumsy. So I only wear it when I'm going out on the town.  I actually have a "placeholder" silver ring that I wear the other 90% of the time, and then there are times when I'm not wearing either ring (like, umm..right now!)

I've learned my lesson though- my wedding band will definitely be of a style that I can wear every day without fearing I'm going to break it!

I love my engagement ring and wedding band and I really wish I could wear them but I have gained too much weight since the wedding and they don't fit.  I am taking them to the only place I trust in London to englarge them because they have done it before and did a beautiful job.  I miss wearing my rings cause they are just gorgeous!

June

I never had an engagement ring.  Instead, we bought my wedding ring in the states before moving over to France.  It is just a simple old fashioned eternity ring--plain gold , but with spaces to add pave set little diamonds that go all the way around the ring, one for each year of marriage.  I'll admit we cheated and put 15 diamonds in to cover the front of my finger. 

I believe the "industry standard" for engagement rings is three months salary.   

Haha, my engagement ring rarely sees the light of day now!  It's a gorgeous ring, but the setting is quite high up so it keeps snagging on things...and I can be clumsy. So I only wear it when I'm going out on the town.  I actually have a "placeholder" silver ring that I wear the other 90% of the time, and then there are times when I'm not wearing either ring (like, umm..right now!)

I've learned my lesson though- my wedding band will definitely be of a style that I can wear every day without fearing I'm going to break it!

May I suggest a band that has a flush mount?  That is what mine is like and it never snags, is gorgeous, simple, and I won't break it.

Although, I also have a thin silver band that I wear when working with chemicals (cleaning or doing some jewelry stuff for my pregnant friend who can't do it ring now) to protect the ring from getting nasty chemicals trapped in the setting.

Mine kinda looks like this:
http://www.iweddingband.com/diamond_wedding_bands.asp (the big picture at the top).

I think it should be what ever can be afforded.  DH and I were of the opinion that we would rathr spend any extra £ on doing things together rather than jewlery.  I got pretty lucky with my ring.  We had been periodically looking at jewlery stores and had no luck.  Either things were too pricey or they didn't look right on my hand.  ( I have very tiny fingers but they are also short so they pretty much look like stubs lol.)  Anyways, we were in Belfast with friends and one of the stores there was having a kick-ass sale so I got my £400 ring for £150.