Homesick and Lonely

Wow..I completely understand your homesickness. Mine has been so bad I've been in tears. I have missed my "staples" here like Miracle Whip and Hershey bars to name just a few things. I have been here 6 months and the only thing that has helped was finding the Made In America Ltd store on this expat site.
http://www.americanexpats.co.uk/buyamericanuk.htm [nofollow]

Its also helped to find this forum where I can post when I'm feeling lonely and isolated. I'm in Calne, Wiltshire which is not a place in the hub of everything. I came here from Phoenix,AZ which has 3 million ppl. I am adjusting slowly(can't wait to get my miracle whip and hershey bars) which make it feel more like home here. Looking forward to your replies.    

P.S  u can email me @ webbgodesss@yahoo.co.uk

hello webgoddess...just wanted to let you know that i get the same feelings of homesickness as well..it comes and goes..what helps are trips back to the US and familiar things whether it is music or foods...i have found maricle whip at tescos here in southeast england...have u checked ..sometimes you have to check difft stores and also..i have grown to like some of the chocolates here..yummy yummy...anyhow...wish you the best of luck....remember you arent alone out there...hang in there

Thanks so much Blondshania!!!

I'll definetelty hang in there. I think I saw you are about to be married or are just newly married. Congrats if this is true.  

i have been homesick and have slipped into quite a depression. in the US i had my own apartment, job, went to college, owned a car, and basically supported myself. i had loads of friends and a dog that i loved more than anything in the world. i really miss my dog (i just couldn't afford to bring him or to put him through quaratine). i used to think i was really outgoing and likeable, but i haven't met a single friend since i have been here. maybe i am really shy or i just don't get english humor (humour-or whatever) or just leaving everything that i've ever had gets me down. i used to think that i was good with direction as well, but i keep getting lost in london. i can't go anywhere without getting lost. i even had to buy a compass to help me navigate. i'm from the farmland and london is just too big and overwhelming. i'd like to think that i have so much here to enjoy-like all of the culture london has to offer, but its all so expensive i can't afford to ever go out. the museums are free, and i love art, but there is only so many consecutive days that one can spend at a museum.

anyway, i'm just lonely and feeling sorry for myself. i'm sure it will pass. i just had no idea what i was getting myself into when i came here, and certainly no idea that it would take well over 7 months to adjust. i hope it gets better soon.

Hi Sleepy....

Can I just say that I totally, *totally* can relate.  I remember very well those feelings of being lost, wondering if anything I thought was true about myself was still actually true.  Moving to a new country will certainly bring those feelings out in a person.

One of the biggest mistakes people make when they move here from the US is to assume that it'll take as much as a few months to settle in.  Actually, the truth is, it generally takes more like a few years.  I've been here nearly two years now and I can honestly say that it wasn't until the last few months that I have finally started feeling 'adjusted'.....mind, I still get homesick, still miss the US, and all of that, but I am feeling better.  

Like you, I'm from the countryside and moving to London has been a serious adjustment.  But I think moving to any major city would have been hard....the fact that I had to give up everything that defined me and that I loved sure didn't make it any easier.

I can totally relate to your dog story by the way.  I had to leave my baby behind to, and unfortunately she's since passed away...talk about guilt!

Anyway, what helped me is making friends, finding hobbies....all those things I'm sure you already know about.  If all else fails, there's lots of us in and around London that would be happy to meet for a cup of joe or something to cheer you up....or at least let you know you aren't alone.  

Just holler!  We're here for ya!

wow, thanks for that wishstar. sometimes it just helps to know that someone else knows how you feel.  i know things will get better, but sometimes its easy to get depressed and then you are unable to see a light at the end of the tunnel or whatever.  
hopefully i will make friends soon. i am starting a job next week and i'm excited about that. its been hard not working for the past 6 months.
and i've booked a 'wing night' at the canadian pub in covent garden (man i really miss hot wings!).
so today, everything is looking up. i hope i have more days like this and less of those depressing ones.

thanks for the words of encouragement and understanding. i really need those sometimes. (i can't believe it took me 6 months to find this site!)  

sleepy, I'm not sure if this will cheer you up (because someone else goes through it) or if it will depress you more (because I've been here 5 years and still have the problem)...I am a total clutz when it comes to directions. It took me a year to relearn left and right. I can walk out of a place and head in exactly the opposite direction, thinking, no, darnit, adament that I am right. I can't get to a store that I've been to at least 20 times without missing the turn, or questioning if I should go right or straight. It's not quite debilitating, because I almost always do find the way...eventually, but it is totalling humiliating because I am not a stupid, dense, ditzy person. (NO ONE is this stupid/dense/ditzy!) I was not like this before I moved here.

LisaE

thanks for that. its good to know that i am not the only suffering from this direction problem. i also find it difficult (when driving on the motorways) that things are oriented by their relation to other places. I think orienting it by north, south, east, & west would work much better. you only have to know 4 things. but whenever we go anywhere by car, all of the signs say this way to 'whatever place' and that way towards 'that other place' and so on, and i don;t know where any of those places are! all i know is that i should be heading northeast! why can't there be signs saying 'north bound' or something?! grr...i get so frustrated.

sometimes i am even convinced that my 'london a-z' is a really outdated map (even though it was bought less than a year ago)! ah well, i guess i should just get used to it and remember to bring my trusty compass with me when i travel!

I've been here a little over 3 months. I feel so lost, homesick and my sense of independence is gone. I cannot work (I'm here on a fiance visa). I haven't made a friend out here yet, my family calls me once a week mainly to speak to my children. I am only familiar with a few streets but often get lost, which has never happened to me before. I am usually very good with directions. I am from a small town in New Mexico and it's quite a change for me. I just found this site today and I am so happy to know that I am not alone, (it sure felt like I was  :'(). I know I have my fiance(he works long hours  ) and my children but I do miss the friends I did have. I'm sure you understand. I haven't even driven car out here yet and from the looks of it I'm a bit scared to. Good idea for the compass though, I'll have to try that. I hope to talk to somebody from here, I have so many questions, concerns and worries. I feel so helpless.

Ann

Never fear!  Wench is here!  (hmm, or should that be, Time to Fear, Wench is here? hehe)

[smiley=wacky.gif]

Okies, for those of you feeling lonely in london...gimme a shout at crescent_wench@yahoo.com and we'll see if we can't arrange a wander about london day.  You get lost?  Please, I'll get you lost in styyyyle.    rofl.  I can point out the way to Subways, Sally's, Ben & Jerry's and give directions to a Auntie Anne's Pretzels and of course the god-like Cinnabunn.  Also there's a nice comic book store Tottenham court road way for those of you interested.  I've been here just over two years now and seriously finding this site returned me to what little sanity I ever had.    So if you're lonely/bored and feel like meeting a mad american (Look for the bright pink fuzzy purse!  Raise your hand if that was the instructions you heard from me first when meeting at Borders.  lol) then just gimme a shout.  

wench

Ann,
You're in a good place to be...there are lots of us folks in the Romford area. (Not me, but plenty others on this board.) We've all felt the same, so you're going to have a lot of shoulders. Trust me, things do get better.

Ann, yet another "I know exactly how you feel" post.  I've been here for about 2 1/2 years now and I still have the feelings you're experiencing now (Hmmm ...that sounds worse than it is! I've slowly been acclimatizing, but I have more days here in the UK where I feel lonely, friendless, homesick, isolated than I EVER had in the States), but with hope *cue angels singing*. It DOES get better. It takes time, patience and the fortitude to DO it, but really, it gets better. Personally, I've felt like I've had to reassemble my life. Everything that made up my life in the States has stayed motionless while I've travelled 5000 miles away. Putting that all together in the first place took a lifetime - putting it together again is going to take some time. BeLIEVE me, I know this all sounds like trite platitudes and there are many, many days when I don't believe it myself, but I see it happening (Ever, ever so slowly) and coming together. If that doesn't help, than skip on down to the local pub and have a stiff drink - hey, it works for me!

I'm close to Reading myself, but would absolutely love to meet some people. A trip into London (And a day free of domestic bliss *smirk*) would be fantabulous.

Michelle

Thanks guys. I feel better knowing I'm not alone. I am happy to see I got responses .

I can point out the way to Subways, Sally's, Ben & Jerry's and give directions to a Auntie Anne's Pretzels and of course the god-like Cinnabunn.

I did not know this!   I need to find these places, lol. Thanks Wench for that bit of info, now directions, showing, etc. would be so much appreciated.  

Do you all get together and chat, or is it just posting?

Ann

Hi Ann,

There are some big get togethers now and then, but most of us have small informal outings.

For example, Denalyia and I are meeting this Sunday in Covent Garden at a Mexican Restraunt she *swears* won't disappoing a California girl....and then we're gonna catch a movie or something.  

You wanna come along???  

I promise we're not scary and I know we'd both love to meet some of you newbies!!!!!  

Anyone else wanna have a girls day out on Sunday in London?  The more the merrier!!!!

I've been here a little over 3 months. I feel so lost, homesick and my sense of independence is gone. I cannot work (I'm here on a fiance visa). I haven't made a friend out here yet, my family calls me once a week mainly to speak to my children. I am only familiar with a few streets but often get lost, which has never happened to me before. I am usually very good with directions. I am from a small town in New Mexico and it's quite a change for me. I just found this site today and I am so happy to know that I am not alone, (it sure felt like I was  :'(). I know I have my fiance(he works long hours  ) and my children but I do miss the friends I did have. I'm sure you understand. I haven't even driven car out here yet and from the looks of it I'm a bit scared to. Good idea for the compass though, I'll have to try that. I hope to talk to somebody from here, I have so many questions, concerns and worries. I feel so helpless.

Ann

Hi Ann!  I'm in the Romford area as well and I'm always up for a get together!  PM me any time!