He's there and I am here

  Anyone coping with two households?  Hubby has an apartment in London and I'm here in Tucson, holding down the fort until I can join him full-time in January.
 

Not anymore...but we did it for over a year and a half. First we planned to bring him to the US, but that ended up taking more time than we had patience. So we finally joined him in the UK two years ago this month. But I remember how tough it can be. And the pleasure of double expenses for the effort too. Good luck and PM if you ever need a shoulder.

We did it for the first 3 years of our marriage.  Like terriponeale, our orginal plan was for Mr. K to join me in the US.  But we encountered some very significant challenges on the visa side, and so I moved here.  The separation was not fun, but it can be survived.  I know January seems a long way off, though.  Will you get to see him before then?  I was always grateful for the fact that we had the advantage of cheap telephone calls and the internet.  At least you can keep in touch on a regular basis that way.

You have a great resource with this board.  You will find inspiration, because you can see all the relationships that have survived the same challenges as you, as well as support, because we really do understand what you are going through!

We have two households... Me here in Dallas, Texas, and him in Amble, England, renting our new place and moving all our stuff in without me!    But, we are lucky according to what I have read on here.  We met online in August 2007, we met in person in December 2007, we managed to fly back and forth to see each other every 6 - 8 weeks (thanks to my student loans, which we will have to pay back!) and we were married on May 3, 2008.  I applied for visa two weeks ago and already received it in the mail, and I will be leaving to join him in the UK on July 13, 2008.  So we had less than a year of separation, but having Skype (videochat) helped immensely, as we could do the normal "how was your day?" talk everyday, plus all the important stuff... we miss each other terribly, but at least we feel so much a part of each others' lives in spite of the distance...
it does get better if you only believe in what you can do!

  Anyone coping with two households?  Hubby has an apartment in London and I'm here in Tucson, holding down the fort until I can join him full-time in January.
 

I will be doing this exact same thing soon.....the wife is going back on Sept 2nd and I am holding down the fort with the dogs until they are good to go at the end of Jan.

We shouldn't have any problems as we have done this before when I was in the Air Force....it is still tough, but as long as you still have some support where you are and you get to talk to your hubby alot things will be goldin!

Fiance & I haven't seen each other since January, I am getting more than a little cranky.     But hopefully we'll be done with this miserable separation soon.  Fingers crossed!
I hope the time passes quickly for you and without too many tears.    

wow!  I have been visiting back home in Houston for nearly a month now while my love is in our home in England and I am losing my mind!  Long distance from him just makes me completely confused. 

IT's certainly not an easy thing but what keeps us going is the 'if's its meant to be it will be' and we both believe it to be so.
I find communication and more communication every day essential. When we met (online in 2006) we just started wth little emails..then graduated to MSN instant messager, then by June 2007 I bought a webcam! The first time we chatted webcam was scary but cool... ANd when I went to the US last September for 2 weeks, after chatting everyday, it felt like we had known each other forever....  have since been out there in Jan and then May of this year.

We chat everyday on the cam, email about 10 x a day and when the internet misbehaves (Arghhhh) we can text too.
Some days I call the 'arghhh!' days - you know when something bad has happened and you chat on the cam and just want a hug or to give them a hug or where the seperation can get soul wrenchingly painful!
But most times we manage to cope with the distance even if it may be another year or so before we can be together for good. Family and friends help too and having planned visits... I am awaiting September with anxiety as he comes over for a few months for his first visit to the UK and the dreaded IO fear sets in!

But if you look at it January isn't too far away (although it may seem it now!!!) and then that will be full-time!

Sending all us out there pining and waiting lots of love and light!!!

Gosh, I have waffled on and on!

IT's certainly not an easy thing but what keeps us going is the 'if's its meant to be it will be' and we both believe it to be so.
I find communication and more communication every day essential. When we met (online in 2006) we just started wth little emails..then graduated to MSN instant messager, then by June 2007 I bought a webcam! The first time we chatted webcam was scary but cool... ANd when I went to the US last September for 2 weeks, after chatting everyday, it felt like we had known each other forever....  have since been out there in Jan and then May of this year.

We chat everyday on the cam, email about 10 x a day and when the internet misbehaves (Arghhhh) we can text too.
Some days I call the 'arghhh!' days - you know when something bad has happened and you chat on the cam and just want a hug or to give them a hug or where the seperation can get soul wrenchingly painful!
But most times we manage to cope with the distance even if it may be another year or so before we can be together for good. Family and friends help too and having planned visits... I am awaiting September with anxiety as he comes over for a few months for his first visit to the UK and the dreaded IO fear sets in!

But if you look at it January isn't too far away (although it may seem it now!!!) and then that will be full-time!

Sending all us out there pining and waiting lots of love and light!!!

Gosh, I have waffled on and on!

We used webcams, too, and I know exactly what you mean about how hard it is when the internet would screw up or you just needed a hug or something.  Luckily for us, though, we only had to do it for 9 months and the longest we went without seeing each other was 9 weeks! It must be so hard to have to wait so long to see each other.  I still don't know how we managed all those trips, as neither of us had much money, but I guess I can say thanks to the student loans!     Hang in there, everyone that is struggling with the distance, it's so worth it when you get those moments together, and definitely worth it when you get to be together forever! 

I too, know only too well, how all this feels.

The webcam. The distance. The wait. The anticipation.

It sometimes feels like being a mouse on one of those wheels. Running to stand still.

But it will be worth it.

It so will.

Love xxx

Oh boy, been doing it for something like 15 years now: me and son in US and him and daughter still in UK. He comes to us several times a year. See her once or twice a year.  It all started with ailing parents who needed help on both sides.  Went on much too long so lost the old "indefinite" stamp in passport and they are both stuck there because of health issues (and I'm not eligible for NHS)
So its nightly phone calls, emails, just got Skype but not all set up with webcams yet.
Immigration for both countries seems unsympathetic.

I too, know only too well, how all this feels.

The webcam. The distance. The wait. The anticipation.

It sometimes feels like being a mouse on one of those wheels. Running to stand still.

But it will be worth it.

It so will.

Love xxx

It will indeed TAL! Not long now!

I know exactly what you mean about how hard it is when the internet would screw up

Isn't that horrible?!  Talk about panic stations.  I call my internet provider and want to reach through the phone and grab someone and yell "You don't understand!  This is so much more than necessary!  I NEED MY INTERNET!!!"
Just a little overreaction?   

Best of luck and hugs to everyone still waiting.   

Gosh no way!! No over reaction!!! It's less than they deserve!

Oh boy, been doing it for something like 15 years now: me and son in US and him and daughter still in UK. He comes to us several times a year. See her once or twice a year.  It all started with ailing parents who needed help on both sides.  Went on much too long so lost the old "indefinite" stamp in passport and they are both stuck there because of health issues (and I'm not eligible for NHS)
So its nightly phone calls, emails, just got Skype but not all set up with webcams yet.
Immigration for both countries seems unsympathetic.

Oh gosh, that is so sad petal....
It is a worry the ailing parents and ailing health. I can only imagine, my dad is unwell at the moment and my mum and step-dad are not too great and my BFs parents are in their 80s so it is a worry.
I can only imagine what you must be going through - 15 years... a long time. But you have stood the test of time and know more than any here how hard it is.
 I am sending lots of white light and healing vibes your way. I only hope they get there! I have been known to miss.
Blessings
xxx