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Topic: Sad news for me....  (Read 6495 times)

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  • Jewlz
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Sad news for me....
« on: October 30, 2008, 04:04:34 PM »
Just found out through a chat session with my mom that my grandma had to put my dad's dog to sleep a few days ago.  My father has been gone for 8 years, and somehow knowing the pet he loved is gone makes me feel like he is even MORE gone, or just gone again... I don't know how to explain it.  When my mom told me, I burst into tears here at work.  It was sadder to hear about it through a chat session on google, I wish she had waited and told me over the phone after work or something.  Guess she didn't know how sad I would be over it. 
I can't seem to shake off how sad I am over it, it's like it opened new wounds for me about my dad passing away, which is something I haven't really cried over in a long time.   :\\\'(
Just wanted to get it off my chest, thanks for listening....


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Re: Sad news for me....
« Reply #1 on: October 30, 2008, 04:12:03 PM »
I'm sorry to hear that Jewlz. Hugs to you.
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Re: Sad news for me....
« Reply #2 on: October 30, 2008, 04:18:10 PM »
Awww, so sorry for you.  It is every bit as sad to lose an animal as it is a human friend or relation.  And even more so when its at a distance.  The worst of it is sometimes associates try to cheer you up saying "At least it was only a dog or cat or whatever.  You'll get over it"  You have to grieve just as much.
I just came across some photos of my Ma and Pa, now both gone, with the dog Sarah that my Pa had "adopted" (she came to visit every day)  And they're all three of them gone now.  Sad.
« Last Edit: October 30, 2008, 04:21:41 PM by BostonDiner »
>^.^<
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Re: Sad news for me....
« Reply #3 on: October 30, 2008, 04:20:16 PM »
Oh Jewlz.  I am sorry to hear that your feeling blue  :(  Have a good cuddle with the hubby when you get home..have a nice bubbly bath...eat something really naughty but delicious and have a early night..

Hope you feel better soon.
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Re: Sad news for me....
« Reply #4 on: October 30, 2008, 06:41:40 PM »
Aww!  I am so sorry to hear that you are having a tough time right now...Everything will start to look up soon because you are an amazing person and it has too!  :)  Feel better soon!!
Even after all this time the sun never says to the Earth "You owe me."
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Re: Sad news for me....
« Reply #5 on: October 30, 2008, 06:47:59 PM »
I'm so sorry! I can understand where you're coming from. During this whole thing with Satan last month and we had the thoughts of him possibly having to be put down...I lost it a few times. He was my sisters cat and alot of people don't understand how still having the persons pet is having a link to that person even after they are gone. It's comforting...

Again I'm really sorry for the loss of your dad and your dad's doggy. *hugs* Like someone else said just go home and get a hug from your hubby.

Wherever you go, no matter what the weather, always bring your own sunshine.


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Re: Sad news for me....
« Reply #6 on: October 30, 2008, 09:08:47 PM »
 :(   I'm sorry you're feeling sad.  I hope the weekend brings you some smiles.


Re: Sad news for me....
« Reply #7 on: October 30, 2008, 09:33:34 PM »
Totally understandable that this would bring up the loss of your father.  Hope you feel better soon.


  • Jewlz
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Re: Sad news for me....
« Reply #8 on: October 31, 2008, 08:55:07 AM »
Thanks for the replies, everyone... I did get a nice wuddle off the hubby.  I am still feeling a bit down, for a lot of things, I think.  Well, there was the dog, then when I got home there was a message from a close friend who was crying, saying her boss died and she was really upset, then I called my mom and she was upset over my other grandmother's poor health, I tried to call my (favourite) grandma and she didn't answer, my stepson was being awkward with me and wouldn't even let me sit next to him on the couch and when I did get a wuddle off hubby the kid just stared me down like he was jealous (I guess he is) and to top it all off, I have PMS.  So I got up with the kiddo this morning, only he turned his back to me and laid on the floor blocking the baby gate so I couldn't come in and again with the saying no and getting up every time I sit on the couch, even if I sit 3 feet away from him.  To be honest, I was kind of glad to see him go back to his mother this morning, which makes me feel like a terrible person.  I love him, but it hurts so much to be rejected right now that I just can't handle it right now.
I think I am having a first bout of homesickness, REALLY missing my sweet grandma and she never seems to be around when I call and she can't call me because she has Parkinson's and has trouble finding things or dialing the phone.  Her house is terrible, everything is falling apart, she had a gas leak so the gas company turned off her gas and no she has no heat or oven, and since I am an only child and my father was an only child and is now dead, she is all alone now that I am over here.  I know there wasn't much I could do for her even when I was there, but now that I am here, it seems there is even less I can do for her and I feel guilty and depressed.
OK, that was my rant, and I feel better for getting it off my chest....  :\\\'(


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Re: Sad news for me....
« Reply #9 on: October 31, 2008, 12:15:52 PM »
Sounds like you got a dose of the only-child syndrome alright.  You feel responsible for everybody.  You're just wired differently and agonize about things more. Both my DH and I were only children which is a pretty tricky situation when you're in an international relationship.
My father had Parkinson's so I know what that's like.  That's why I came back to the US to help out my mother (who was developing Alzheimer's) when he had to go into a nursing home.  It's hard to communicate with people when they've got  conditions like that (let alone at a distance) so you feel you need to be there even if you can't do much.
But you've got your own life.  And you can keep trying to contact Grandma and you can send her little things and pictures and so on.  But it is hard, I know.
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Re: Sad news for me....
« Reply #10 on: October 31, 2008, 12:41:25 PM »
I'm so sorry.


Re: Sad news for me....
« Reply #11 on: October 31, 2008, 10:59:39 PM »
I'm sorry to hear that your Dad's dog's been put down.  Like Turtle said, its the last pieces you have of him, and now its like he's gone completely...   :-\\\\  Aside from that you sound to be having (quite) a bit of a rough patch.  I hope things start to turn around for you!


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Re: Sad news for me....
« Reply #12 on: October 31, 2008, 11:21:05 PM »
First of all, I'm sorry to hear about your loss, and about the feelings it's brought back to the surface. *hugs*  That said, this part or your post really, really struck a chord with me, as it's pretty much exactly how I feel about my parents' situation and my move to the UK:

Her house is terrible, everything is falling apart, she had a gas leak so the gas company turned off her gas and no she has no heat or oven, and since I am an only child and my father was an only child and is now dead, she is all alone now that I am over here.  I know there wasn't much I could do for her even when I was there, but now that I am here, it seems there is even less I can do for her and I feel guilty and depressed.

Unfortunately, I don't really have any real advice or help to offer you, but maybe it'll help to know you're not alone in feeling this way - it's helped me a bit to read your post and know that I'm not the only one, either, even if I'd rather not anyone know how it feels!  If that makes any sense....



  • Jewlz
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Re: Sad news for me....
« Reply #13 on: November 03, 2008, 11:42:32 AM »
It makes perfect sense... and I am glad someone can relate, even though, like you said, it sucks to feel that way, and I wouldn't wish it on anyone else!

I am feeling better, now, though... Talked to my grandma this weekend, and she always makes me smile, and then spent some time on the webcam with my best friend last night, which really cheered me up.  Things are going well for me, here, really, compared to lots of others who are really struggling with homesickness and can't work or anything.  And I know things will continue to get better over time.  Once I get my driving licence sorted and we have a bit more cashflow, my attitude will greatly improve.  As for my stepson, I love him to bits, and one day he will realize that and warm up to me a bit more, I just have never been very patient, and now I see I will have to learn how to be more patient.   ;)  It will get easier...


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