Friend turned away at Heathrow for a visit to BF, needs advice please!

i think the only reason i got through was because i knew the rules so well. i knew we weren't supposed to get married, knew all about the various visas etc... and that convinced them i wasn't there to sneak around the system. it wasn't my first time to england by a long shot, and david and i had met many many times prior since we didn't even meet on the internet, but in real life. at the end of the day i think some get lucky and some don't.

*nods* I agree.  I didn't get hassled at all and I'm here for 2 months, but Tim and I also met in person at a convention in 2005....our current relationship is largely online only, but since I was able to tell the IO we met at a convention in 2005 it probably "looked better" over "we met on the internet". 

does that mean she has to apply for a visitor's visa?

Did I see on another topic thread that having too many visa applications could go against you when you came to seek spousal entry?  I had that impression from what the IO was telling me when I entered three years ago.  She said that if I came back and forth -- for whatever reason and within the time limit -- at some point they could just send me back.  And this would pretty much be a black mark.  She was pushing for us applying for the spousal thing right away (but since I don't want to reside there permanently at this point ...)

Did I see on another topic thread that having too many visa applications could go against you when you came to seek spousal entry? 

I don't know if you saw that, but if you did, the best advice would be to ignore it.  Having evidence of a substantive relationship works in the applicant's favor in a settlement application.

On the other hand, having lots of visits that lack any sort of premise works against the temporary visitor.

Settlement versus non-settlement.  Different fields entirely but it's always easy to confuse them.

As I have said before, only saying friend can come and bite you in the ars* in the future.  I have seen many refusal statements which read...

"you have applied for leave to enter the UK as the fiancee of John Bloggs.  In 2006 you entered the UK claiming that you were coming to visit Mr Bloggs, stating he was a 'friend'.  On your fiancee visa application you state that you have been in a  relationship with Mr Bloggs since 2004.  This discrepancy leads me to doubt the true nature of your relationship, and I therefore do not accept that you intend to marry your sponsor as claimed."

Be careful.

Vicky

It is also paradoxical to me that a thread about getting bounced drifts to the credibility problems of American women (which is fine), and then (incredibly!) drifts into which lies are the most effective.      

It's incredible.

It is precisely because people don't tell the truth that immigration is getting tougher and more genuine people are getting bounced.

Vicky

As I have said before, only saying friend can come and bite you in the ars* in the future.  I have seen many refusal statements which read...

"you have applied for leave to enter the UK as the fiancee of John Bloggs.  In 2006 you entered the UK claiming that you were coming to visit Mr Bloggs, stating he was a 'friend'.  On your fiancee visa application you state that you have been in a  relationship with Mr Bloggs since 2004.  This discrepancy leads me to doubt the true nature of your relationship, and I therefore do not accept that you intend to marry your sponsor as claimed."

Vicky

It's been a long time since I filled it out, but I thought the fiance visa app asks you when you met your sponsor, not how long you have been engaged.

Many romantic relationships start out as friendships and then evolve into something more later. The first time I came to the UK to meet the man who is now my husband, I tolled the ECO that I was seeing a friend. I wasn't lying.

The form has changed about six times since you did it.

There is a question which asks when you first discussed moving in together, and of course the support letters will nearly always contain this information.

You may be someone who told the truth, but that isn't relevant, as clearly there are many hundreds who don't.

Vicky

I apologize to the OP here as this thread has veered off her original question, but since we're talking about it...
If a couple "met" online, but since have actually MET in person, is it considered untruthful, and could it come back to bite you if when asked how you met (either at the airport or on future visa applications), you offer the time you met in person with no mention to anything online?  We consider the time we met face to face as our original meeting and I have never thought of this to be untruthful.  Am I wrong?

Yes mirra, No matter that, as 24th level Paladin and 31st level Druid, you conquered the underworld together in some online game that took 8 months, it's when your non-virtual alter-egos meet in real-life that actually counts.

I almost got bounced and I wasn't even dating anyone in the UK! I had printed off my bank statement, my credit card statement, a letter from my employer, and proof of enrollment at my university. (This was over spring break)

I was detained for several hours, questioned and requestioned and then questioned some more, finger printed twice, (did they think I had gone and changed my fingerprints?!?!?)  and stuck in an extremely cold room with a some people who didn't seem all there (They kept yelling at and cussing out immigration officers).

I really was just coming to the UK as a tourist and to visit friends. I had done BUNAC in the past and visited twice before, once for a month and once for two weeks - all over a four year period.

I was finally let into the UK, I enjoyed my visit, and left on the day I had been stamped to leave.

I want to go back for another visit, but I've been kind of afraid to. I would never want to go through all of that again. 

They are supposed to have stopped putting unaccompanied women in the room with all the screwballs!  Grrrr.  What was the date of this episode?

March 2007.  I was crying, so maybe they thought I was a screwball? But it wasn't  hysterical crying. Just a few tears really. I was frightened/exhausted/intimidated. I'd never been in any type of situation where I was "in trouble" before!

There was only one other woman, who had a child and I was the only person who wasn't from the Middle East or Africa.

If I do go back for another visit, should I get a visitors visa? I didn't get bounced and I didn't overstay.

IMiss, applying for a Visitors Visa, that is a tough one.  They might have thought you were up to something else last time because of the amount of support you brought with you when you were just visiting (thou doest protest too much) and given that you had a pattern of coming to the UK and spent time on BUNAC they may have thought you were planning something else.

What did your passport say?  Did they curtail your last entry (you said you left on the date on your passport).  Did they give you a 6 month stamp?  Did they give you any formal paperwork?  What did they say when they finally let you in?  This would help figure out what you might face on return.

I did not show them any of the paperwork until they ask for it. I had it "just in case"

They did not give me a six month - it was stamped for the date of my return flight.

They gave me a long lecture about not overstaying when they let me in. I was given some paperwork about why I had been detained.

I had been denied a visa to come over a do volunteer work, but that was a year before my visit. So I'm fairly sure it was that nasty stamp in my passport that caused the trouble. I was denied the visa because the organization I was going to volunteer with worded their letter wrong. I decided the organization was poorly run and went back to college instead of trying again.

I know that I should have applied for visitors visa for then.

I had a letter from my college staying I was enrolled. What I thought was funny is that I had brought some of my math homework with me to work on while on the plane. When they were taking things to make copies of, they took my math homework but didn't take my journal.