Why Aren't Thin People Fat?

I think one of the most important things the show said wasn't about whether or not people naturally have a set point where their weight is concerned or if an infection causes obesity, but in order to maintain their weight, people have to have a very accurate internal monitor.  This monitor works well in so many people whether they are highly active or not.

My monitor is obviously broken.  Whether it was because of what my mother ate during pregnancy, a virus, being taught poor eating habits, damage from carrying excess weight, I've resigned myself to the fact that if I want to keep the weight off that I've lost and continue to work towards my goal, I need to actively monitor my weight.

I am like the queen of losing weight.  I've lost hundreds of pounds over my life with a range of different methods, and I always gain it back once I stop weighing myself regularly (hence my secondary title: "The Dutchess of Regain").  I've lost a significant amount of weight since May 2007, and managed to gain 20 pounds back effortlessly in the past few months by not monitoring my weight and eating what I see others around me eating.  Because I kept planning to go back on my diet after the holidays, but kept making excuses (Mr. A. still off work, nasty ear infection, etc), I avoided the scale.  I got on it yesterday, and I resolved that it might not be fair, but I have to go back to what works for me (my diet, more exercise, and continuing to monitor my weight and make adjustments).

I know what I have to do, and I am not absolving myself of responsibility, but the whole idea that it might not be a question of willpower or morality for either fat people or thin people is something I am glad was put out there by this show.  There's a difference between that and saying that people are resigned to their fate IMO.

Agreed on the "how can you not think about food and forget to eat?"- that seems obsurd!! I know where I fit, food is constantly on my mind. And I don't really like that it is, but there we go. 

I've done the 'forgetting to eat' thing on occasion... sometimes I just can't be bothered to go and find something to eat, especially when I've just arrived home from work late in the evening - the thought of having to make food to eat just seems like too much effort!

Unfortunately, though, it's not really a good thing and when I see my parents, my mum keeps telling me to eat more. For example, on Saturday all I ate was a few Milk Tray chocolates and a tiny sliver of brie in the morning, and a ready-meal cottage pie and a yoghurt in the evening.  I went out for the afternoon (helping out with a dance show) and ended up not being able to get any food or drink for 7 hours! By 7pm I was exhausted and feeling faint from lack of fluid/food and so I scoffed down the pie and yoghurt at a friend's house before heading out to a local cider festival  . Needless to say, I had a terrible headache all day Sunday - both from a little too much alcohol and also the fact that I was hungry and dehydrated from the day before . I know that I need to eat healthily and cook proper meals, but it's difficult being out 11 hours a day, 5 days a week and then trying to cook for just one as well... often, I end up just not bothering to eat much in the evenings (plus I don't have all that much food in the fridge at the moment either, so there's not much choice).

I've done the 'forgetting to eat' thing on occasion... sometimes I just can't be bothered to go and find something to eat, especially when I've just arrived home from work late in the evening - the thought of having to make food to eat just seems like too much effort!

See, that's probably where thin and fat people really lie... you are too busy and can't be bothered... I'm never too busy to eat!!!   
I may not want to cook a full on meal, but I will always happily eat a bowl of cereal, toast, oatcakes with cheese, can of soup, whatever...

I know what I have to do, and I am not absolving myself of responsibility, but the whole idea that it might not be a question of willpower or morality for either fat people or thin people is something I am glad was put out there by this show.  There's a difference between that and saying that people are resigned to their fate IMO.

Yes!!! Definitely!!

I do think its horrible that fat people are considered "lazy and stupid" becuase I can tell you one thing, I am definitley not either of those things.  I like eating, yes, I don't mind exercise as long as its not boring like walking on a treadmill (but give me a physical game, martial arts, hill walking, etc and I'm all for it!!), but lazy and stupid, nope! 

See, that's probably where thin and fat people really lie... you are too busy and can't be bothered... I'm never too busy to eat!!!  
I may not want to cook a full on meal, but I will always happily eat a bowl of cereal, toast, oatcakes with cheese, can of soup, whatever...
 

I really think this is a big difference between people who are lifetime-overweight and people who are not.  I honestly cannot ever imagine not having enough time to eat or not feeling bothered enough to fix something.  To me, NOT having a meal would bother me far more!  Like phatbeetle, I'm never too busy to eat - it's just not a thought that enters my head.  Of course, I TRY and eat the right things, but it just doesn't always work that way!

This has been a really interesting discussion, and I think really helpful for just accepting my damn shape rather than crying over it.

I think most people are 'addicted' to food - I think it's a natural survival mechanism for most! I think what seems to have been lost in the modern, Western world is a more direct relationship with our food, both in preparation and in having to physically go and get it. Being motivated to eat works well if you actually have to physically do something about it. The scorecard balances, so to speak.

But, generally, modern society seems more driven to work, rather than to live, and this is often very sedentary work. Access to either facilities to exercise or to physical environments that promote accessible exercise seem to be dwindling.   

I think the key is to take care of yourself the best you can when you can. Not all of us are able to all of the time, for a variety of internal and external factors. Biology, psychology and societal barriers all have factors to play. I know I have to work hard to look after my health and while I can, I will do. But I also know that this isn't always possible to do to the optimum level: for example, current weather conditions make it difficult for me to even leave the house or due to mobility issues related to ageing. So it's important to not beat oneself up.

I try to focus on my health and detach it from my weight, as weight is not the only indicator or necessarily an accurate indicator, of health. I try and ask myself if I am my friends / loved ones are happy and do they love themselves - this helps me to not focus on what is ultimately superficial. 

What is also problematic, IMO, is that women are often socialised to judge and value themselves and other women on the basis of looks. And tied into this is weight. I think what is worrying is some people's judgemental attitudes that being thin equals some kind of moral superiority, where those that are deemed fat are pathologised. This just highlights how individualistic many Western cultures seem to be, ignoring the interdependence and social nature of what it truly means to be human.   

What is important is to celebrate our own individual fabulousness and promote and develop the good in ourselves and the values we hold dear. 
 

I imagine a thin person's mind, compared to mine, is less concerned with food.

As a thin person, I can tell you, that this is not true. I am constantly concerned with food. I could and have eaten an entire box of Entenmann's chocolate donuts and I am definitely not a  person that can eat what they want without gaining weight. When I eat like that, I gain weight. When I make the very difficult decision not to eat like that and work out regularly, I maintain my weight. I would love to live a life where I'm not concerned about my diet and literally every morsel I put into my mouth, but it's just not possible.

I know there is currently, a lot of focus on the scientific reasons why people are fat (not people that need to lose 20 or 30 lbs) but, IMO, the psychological factors are so much more important to look at. Understanding our relationships with food is an important first step in losing weight, if that is a persons goal.

I really think this is a big difference between people who are lifetime-overweight and people who are not.  I honestly cannot ever imagine not having enough time to eat or not feeling bothered enough to fix something.  To me, NOT having a meal would bother me far more!  Like phatbeetle, I'm never too busy to eat - it's just not a thought that enters my head.  Of course, I TRY and eat the right things, but it just doesn't always work that way!

For me, it depends on my lifestyle at a particular time in terms of being too busy to eat. At the moment, I'm on my feet at work for 7.5 hours a day and because I work in retail I work long-ish days and do weird shifts - so, yesterday I left the house to catch the bus at 8.30am, spent 9 hours at work (7.5 hours on my feet, 1.5 hours sitting down on my breaks) and then arrived home at 7.15pm and today I will be leaving the house at 11am, doing the same at work and then getting home at 9.45pm... so it's hard to eat regular meals with my timetable and because I'm moving around all day, I burn off most of what I eat.

However, when I'm not working in retail (when I was a student/in the US last year), I spend most of my days sitting in front of the computer and not doing much - and as a result, I snack more and don't burn off the extra calories. In my final year of undergrad, I was not very active and got a bit depressed (kind of a culture shock from having an amazing study abroad year in the US and then struggling to get back into the swing of UK uni life) so I comfort-ate and put on almost 20 lbs. But as soon as I graduated and moved back home, I felt better and I was working in retail again... so dropped the 20 lbs in the next 5 months (10 lbs in the first 6 weeks!).

I kept that weight off for the next year, but as soon as I went back to uni for my masters (sitting in an office all day) and only worked in retail part-time, I put half a stone back on. I lost it again due to the stress of my US visa application, but same thing happened when I moved to the NM last year and was doing office work again. Then last summer, just before I moved back to the UK, I was sick with a stomach bug and lost the half-stone again - I've managed to keep it off since then because, I'm back on my feet all the time again !!

I think most people are 'addicted' to food

I both agree and disagree with this statement.  I would say that people are more addicted to the act of eating - much like smoking, alcohol, shopping, etc.  It's a social thing - you probably eat when with a group of friends at a cafe; it's a comfort thing - you probably eat when you're feeling moody or depressed; it's a survival thing - you certainly eat when you're hungry.  Only the last situation represents a necessary for life action, the rest are not.

I do wish people thought more about "food" rather than eating.  I may sound a bit like a broken record, but if people's calories came from food closer to their original states people might feel more satisfied, would be healthier nutritionally, and might in fact eat less. I see lots of people eating those lean cuisine/weight watchers/jenny craig/nutrisystem ready meals thinking that they were eating healthy - but when you look at the ingredients on those things it's mind-boggling how much sodium and non-food crap is in them to make them look pretty, last a long time, and retain colors and smells that make them appetizing in the end.  I myself am guilty of having relied on them daily for years, but once I started reading labels and realizing I was wasting part of my daily calorie intake on things like "modified corn starches" and "xantham gum" rather than on "chicken breast" or "tomatoes", well I got serious about what I was eating rather than the act of eating.  And no wonder I was still hungry after eating one - I got my calories, sure, but I hadn't gotten very much nutrition out of it.

I'm not saying that they don't have their place in a modern world.  It's when people start relying on them as a primary source of "food", though, that it gets problematic in my opinion.  I do think that people who are more distant from food - because they relied on prepacked items as their main source of calories - have a more difficult time getting and staying healthy.  Their taste buds change; they can't taste how salty or sweet something actually is, and things that are "normal food" (like fresh tomatoes from the garden) taste bland and flavorless in comparison.  Which of course compels them to eat more prepackaged "food", which is precisely what the manufacturers want.  Vicious cycle....

I both agree and disagree with this statement.  I would say that people are more addicted to the act of eating - much like smoking, alcohol, shopping, etc.  It's a social thing - you probably eat when with a group of friends at a cafe; it's a comfort thing - you probably eat when you're feeling moody or depressed; it's a survival thing - you certainly eat when you're hungry.  Only the last situation represents a necessary for life action, the rest are not.

I do wish people thought more about "food" rather than eating.  I may sound a bit like a broken record, but if people's calories came from food closer to their original states people might feel more satisfied, would be healthier nutritionally, and might in fact eat less.

I actually think you're contradicting yourself a bit there. I agree with your first statement. At least for me I wouldn't have a weight issue at all if I could overcome the emotional eating thing. I eat when I'm hungry but I also eat when I'm happy, sad, tired, bored, stressed, worried, angry, celebrating, entertaining... it's been psychologically welded together - food and psychological states. My first instinct is to eat and after 40 years (my mom started it, unfortunately) that's a damn hard thing to break.

But I disagree with the second bit of your argument. I VERY rarely eat anything processed (except maybe bread - I'm too lazy to bake my own - and cereal), don't have much of a sweet tooth, and have recently gone back to being a vegetarian (nearly vegan) after a five year hiatus. I don't keep junk food in the house, I cook dinner from scratch 90%+ nights, and I almost always take either a salad or dinner leftovers to work for lunch. Healthy eating has not broken my food addiction.

I'm overweight for two reasons - because I tune out too often and eat on autopilot whilst listening to false cues (quantity is my issue, not quality) and because I have a desk job and haven't yet made exercise a priority for myself....

Not only that my mother was over weight as were her mother and her mother before that.

Same here. My cousin (who is roughly the same age I am) and I often have this discussion. We have the exact same body shape: high waist, overweight, most of our weight carried in our tummies. We look at pictures of our grandmother, and she was the same shape. As was our great-grandmother. Exactly the same.

But I disagree with the second bit of your argument. I VERY rarely eat anything processed (except maybe bread - I'm too lazy to bake my own - and cereal), don't have much of a sweet tooth, and have recently gone back to being a vegetarian (nearly vegan) after a five year hiatus. I don't keep junk food in the house, I cook dinner from scratch 90%+ nights, and I almost always take either a salad or dinner leftovers to work for lunch. Healthy eating has not broken my food addiction.

I think I eat pretty healthily, too. I'm not a vegetarian, but near enough and have been for 30 years. I don't like processed food and I've only had "fast" food a handful of times in my life. I was raised eating homemade "healthy" food and that's a habit I could never break, even if I tried.

But ... it's all about quantity. I don't get full. No matter how slowly I eat (which is what all the books tell you to do), there's no "stop eating" mechanism in my brain. I'm always hungry. My stomach rumbles and growls nearly all the time. For me to lose weight, I have to be hungry 24/7. And I don't like being hungry. So, to me, that's the difference between my brain and a thin person's. Something in their brain tells them when they're full - and that's missing in me.

But ... it's all about quantity. I don't get full. No matter how slowly I eat (which is what all the books tell you to do), there's no "stop eating" mechanism in my brain. I'm always hungry. My stomach rumbles and growls nearly all the time. For me to lose weight, I have to be hungry 24/7. And I don't like being hungry. So, to me, that's the difference between my brain and a thin person's. Something in their brain tells them when they're full - and that's missing in me.

I have a similar problem in that I can get full, but my tummy/brain will tell me 30 minutes later that I'm 'hungry' again!  And I eat tons of whole grains, fiber, all the wholesome foods designed to make you feel fuller longer.  For instance, I have a good bowl of old-fashioned porridge oats in the morning and I will still be hungry by 10:30am.  It's frustrating, too, because sometimes I feel like no matter how 'good' I am with WHAT I eat, I still get defeated with HOW I eat.

Well, I know there is a physiological cause for some people because I was on a medication that seemed to worsen my food obsession.  When that medication was removed, whatever brain chemical or hormone it messed with subsided and stopped gaining weight (and lost a bit).  I went from thinking about food fairly frequently before the medication to thinking about it all the time.  Literally, I couldn't concentrate on conversations because I was thinking about food.

I think that whatever that chemical interaction was might be going on to a lesser extent in some heavier people (including myself).  I am not saying that there isn't a psychological element; my inability to let myself get back on the diet (which once I am on it helps with my appetite) shows that I have to battle my own psychology at times to try to lose weight (or not gain it).

But if you accept the addiction theory (whether physical, psychological, or both), you have to realise that it's a particularly cruel addiction.  In most other addictions you can avoid the thing you're addicted to and focus on recovery without having to battle with control every day.

My attitudes towards food changes depending upon the day.  Some days I can't understand why I'd ever want to overeat.  The next day I will have to struggle not to rush out and get an order of chips, make a huge meal, or raid Mr. A's goody supply.  

I have a similar problem in that I can get full, but my tummy/brain will tell me 30 minutes later that I'm 'hungry' again!  And I eat tons of whole grains, fiber, all the wholesome foods designed to make you feel fuller longer.  For instance, I have a good bowl of old-fashioned porridge oats in the morning and I will still be hungry by 10:30am.  It's frustrating, too, because sometimes I feel like no matter how 'good' I am with WHAT I eat, I still get defeated with HOW I eat.

I definitely have that in the morning, but I think for me that's just my body clock. I eat breakfast at home, go to work, and am starving by about 10 or so. But later on that doesn't happen - I'm rarely hungry before dinner and never hungry at night. But I really, really hear ya, Aless - I'm constantly in a state of defeat over how I eat.

My attitudes towards food changes depending upon the day.  Some days I can't understand why I'd ever want to overeat.  The next day I will have to struggle not to rush out and get an order of chips, make a huge meal, or raid Mr. A's goody supply.  

See, that's exactly how I feel, but I can usually understand it - on the days I'm not tempted to overeat I'm usually focused - not bored, not over tired, doing enjoyable things, and relatively worry free. If I think hard enough I can nearly always pin point why I want to eat. But what's exhausting is having to do that all of the time (and why I usually fail). It's knackering to have to stop before you eat anything and sit and ponder about why you're doing it. I'm on autopilot far too often for that. It's a bi*ch to break it!!!

Yeah, I think it's like other things - some days are good, some are bad.  It always seem like when I've re-resolved to lose weight that I have a hugely 'hungry day'.  But in a way, it's a vicious cycle - the more I think about how I want to lose weight and eat healthier, I think sometimes that makes me MORE hungry.

Exercise as an appetite suppressant is pretty much hit or miss.  Sometimes I'm absolutely ravenous after the gym, and sometimes I'm okay until I can throw some dinner together.  It's so weird how our bodies go up and down and vary widely from one day to the next when everything else is QED!  That I find hugely frustrating as well.

But ... it's all about quantity. I don't get full. No matter how slowly I eat (which is what all the books tell you to do), there's no "stop eating" mechanism in my brain. I'm always hungry. My stomach rumbles and growls nearly all the time. For me to lose weight, I have to be hungry 24/7. And I don't like being hungry. So, to me, that's the difference between my brain and a thin person's. Something in their brain tells them when they're full - and that's missing in me.

OMG... I've always felt like I was the only one w/out a shut off valve!  Keith just doesn't understand it at all.