Worse Than An IA

Geez, Jewlz, sorry about the job thing and I really hope it doesn't happen! That procedure you described sounds awful. I hope you don't have to repeat it. I can't even imagine. **hugs**

Jewlz, if you need to see a counselor about your pain experience, please PLEASE ask to see one at the hospital. I didn't want to say so in the Local Anaesthetic thread, but I had a horrific experience last September which (the short version) is that I was sliced in to over and over again for 90min and the shots of local only worked for about 20 seconds each (my body processes the anaesthetic really strangely). The experience was so traumatising that I couldn't sleep for reliving it BUT I went and saw the haematoncology counselor and she was utterly brilliant. In only one session she taught me techniques to deal with the experience and it solved the problem for me. It doesn't help you forget what happened, but they can really, really help you to process the experience in a way where it doesn't make you break into a cold sweat and panic sensations just thinking about it.

Hugs for you. I'm glad you have people around you to comfort you through this!

Gosh, SP, that sounds horrible. I don't think it was anything nearly as bad as what you described. I mean, it was very painful, but the memory isn't keeping me up at night or anything.  Mainly, I'm just scared because I have a feeling they are going to have to do it again next week. There's still a big hard lump under there, and I doubt it will go away on its own.  But, they did say they could use a local anesthetic next time, so we will see how it goes. I'm lucky that I haven't had to have too many procedures or anything like that done in my life other than a few stitches here and there, so really, I should be grateful. 

I've been trying to decide whether to put this on the IA thread or this one... it feels more than just an Inconvenient Annoyance to me though, so I'm gonna put it here.

Three weeks ago (after having 2 weeks off for holiday time), I started working in a new role at work as the Healthcare Consultant. I volunteered to do it because I've been getting bored just serving customers all day long and have been wanted to have more to do at work. Problem is, I've just had the most exhausting, stressful 3 weeks at work .

I'm really annoyed because although my manager sat me down and went through some responsibilities and jobs for me to do, I didn't really know what I was supposed to do after I'd done them. She just told me to be off the counter as much as possible and doing other things... but she didn't really tell me what things to do, so I've just been wandering around unsure of my role for the last 3 weeks! It was only this afternoon that one of the girls who used to do the job actually sat down and went through the job role with me: 3 weeks in the role and I only just found out that there is a diary for me to plan things in, that I have 2 filing cabinet drawers full of consultant paperwork just for me and that there is actually a list of things I'm supposed to do each week. I'm so annoyed that nobody told me all of this on my first day... I could have actually been doing something constructive for the last 3 weeks instead of fumbling about, feeling like I don't know what I'm supposed to be doing and like I can't do anything right .

I'm also stressed because I didn't realise that being the consultant meant that the managers from different departments would suddenly come at me from all sides asking me to do a hundred jobs at once. It's all so contradictory: I'm asked to do a job, then I get told off for actually trying to do it! Like on Tuesday I got asked to make a display stand and order over some stock from the warehouse... so I started dismantling the old stand and preparing the new one, only to be told not to do it and just to put everything back where it was. Then later in the day, they're wondering why I haven't done it yet  ! I also had the fun task on Tuesday of spending almost 3 hours cleaning the windows at the front of the store (ready for a management visit the next day). I got home that night completely drained of energy and with blisters on my feet  .

That really sucks, ksand24.  I hate it when stuff like that happens. Hopefully you will settle into your new role soon. When I first started my current job, I had only been in the country for a few weeks and they just stuck me on reception and told me to get on with it... I didn't even have anyone to train me! Thankfully a few days into it, I found a little notebook someone from an agency had left behind that explained a few things and I was able to figure the rest out on my own. Super stressful, though, when someone gives you a job, but then basically leaves it to you to figure out how to do it without giving you any guidance or anything.  Hang in there, hopefully now that you know the score, you can get into some kind of work flow.

Oh, ksand. That sucks.

Any way you could ask for regular meetings with you boss to go through queries? Could you identify some mentors within your workplace for support and guidance?

Hope the stress of the new job smooths over soon. 

Well, at this point, no news is probably bad news. The company who wanted to buy the place hasn't made a move yet and our company still hasn't moved any finished stock out of the place, so it looks like we may not get paid next week, either.  I'm not too worried, well, I am, but you know... I'm not too worried about the long term because I know we will get some benefits to help us, and our boss says if the place goes under, then the dole office will come to the site to register everyone. But it will likely take a few weeks to get the money rolling in, and my parents are coming for a visit in 4 weeks. I wanted to do so many things with them, they haven't had a vacation in 12 years.  But, seeing them will cheer me up at least, and we live in a nice place, so there is always the beach here and everything. I'm sure they will still enjoy it and at least we can all spend time together. I just feel bummed out that it won't be the grand adventure I had planned for them. 

My MIL had the shakes last night while we were playing Scrabble because she is so worried about 3 of her sons and their wives all possibly losing their jobs.  It will really stress her and FIL out with six of us unemployed and they are elderly people. Ugh. I want to sob like a baby but I'm trying to be strong at least until we know for sure, also, I don't want DH to get too depressed, as he has worked there 18 years and will already be devastated, so I feel like I should be the positive one to help cheer him up. Plus I cried in front of MIL a little yesterday and she kind of gave me the stiff upper lip speech.  I guess it won't help and it will just bring everyone down even more. I'm just working out a food budget now and feel so lost in trying to figure out how I can get us through the next several weeks with minimal cost so we don't go too far into our overdraft before the benefits kick in.  This feels like such a nightmare when a few months ago we thought things were going so well. We went through a similar thing two years ago and thought it would blow over this time, too, but it doesn't look like it will.   

Oh, Jewlz. ((Hugs))  You are in my thoughts.

Maybe check the with the local authority to see what free activities are on when your family is here?

Jewlz, I'm so sorry. I hope that something happens and it all works out.

Jewlz, your parents are coming to see YOU and where you live. I'm sure they won't mind not seeing all the sights you might have planned. And they will cheer you up.
Sounds like hard times ahead for a lot of people. I tend to freak when things could go wrong so I know how you must feel.  But you have each other and your families and that's the main thing. You know what they say: when the going gets tough, the tough get going!
But hope there's some good news soon 

Aww huge hugs Jewlz- I can't even imagine how hard it is for you and your family -especially because everyone works there, why do you lean on?  But, BD is right, your family is coming to see you and where you live and there are loads of things you can do that don't cost lots of money.  Also, you can cry if you want to and don't feel like you need to be stiff upper lipped - because it does warrant a good cry if you ask me!!!   

DS has finally seen a doctor who will take his insurance. Has been put on Paxil and Ativan and referred to a shrink. Well, its the right thing -- but he just got off Effexor a year and a half ago. 

DS has finally seen a doctor who will take his insurance. Has been put on Paxil and Ativan and referred to a shrink. Well, its the right thing -- but he just got off Effexor a year and a half ago. 

I hope he feels better soon! Fingers crossed. 

Let's see.  Last week we had to put one of our darling cats down.  He's had leukaemia for 5 years and after a rather sudden drop, we rushed him to the vet who said he was in liver failure and had a spleen full of tumors.  He said it was time and we were with him when he passed.  It's been awful.  Gut wrenching.  Floods of tears. Depression settling in again after having kicked it last fall. 

Today, I had an appt for my annual and I completely freaked out.  Major anxiety attack at the idea of going, being weighed (ugh) and chastised for not losing any weight and then being splayed on the table.  I just couldn't do it so I rescheduled my appointment.  My last appt with my NP ended with an endometrial biopsy without any pain meds so I feel like I have a bit of PTSD now about going back to the doctor. 

So yeah. Fun times at our house.

Really sorry to hear about your cat, Kristi, and your depression. I hope you feel better soon. (((HUGS))).