Driving Scariness...

I feel like such a fool. DH asked if I could drive him 2 miles to the next village for a leaving do for our boss, and I said I wasn't sure I could, but he said he thought I should be able to, so I gave it a go. I had trouble navigating my way out of our own small village where I have lived for 9 months now, so I should know my way around all the turns, but I didn't. He got nervous and said maybe I should turn around and go back, but I told him I had to learn sometime and I would probably learn my way around better by driving myself, so I was sure to pay attention. I dropped him off and headed back alone. Only 2 miles. I was doing ok, but I took a narrow turn and heard glass shatter - I had banged our wing mirror off a parked car, I guess, and the glass shattered. I was terrified, too scared to stop and not knowing where to pull off on a somewhat busy street, I just kept going. I managed to find my way back with a little meandering, trying to keep my cool and not freak out. As soon as I pulled up in front of our house, I burst into tears. I feel so stupid. I drove for years in the states, but now I feel so lost. I feel horrible to tell DH I f'd up our car, and he will probably call in a few minutes to see if I made it home ok. God, if I had only made it without doing that, I might have gained just the tiniest bit of confidence, but that is shattered now. I feel hopeless that I will ever learn to drive here. I hate that I couldn't even bring myself to stop and see what damage I did to someone's car. I was so scared! I can't stop crying, and I wish I had just turned back when he suggested it in the car, but I was proud and thought I would be ok. Now he is probably going to be angry (I'm sure it's illegal to drive with a busted side mirror, and no idea how long it will take to fix it.) I'm just so depressed now.  :\\\'(

Oh, sweety.  It's OK -- its was only a mirror.  You're OK, that's the main thing.  It is scary though, when you think what could happen when you're behind the wheel.

Aw Jewlz!!! It's not uncommon I'm sure. I'm terrified to try to drive over there and doubt I ever will! But at least you gave it a go. Don't let that scare you off it forever. Hope your hubby doesn't get too mad when he realizes how up set you are. Hugs for you!!

Aww don't worry Jewlz- I have a HUGE gouge in the left side of my car and banged up front left bumper and I f'd my mirror up as well...  I was out practicing all alone the night before my driving test and I got nervous down a single track road and cars were coming my way and oh boy.... 
I still passed my test the next day... and I'm the proud owner of a banged up car!

You will get better, I promise!   

I'm glad you're ok and safe!!

Awww, thanks, guys. DH made me feel better just now when I told him. He just laughed and said he has knocked the wing mirror off about 5 times, not counting other people's wing mirrors.    He said it was easy to replace and to not be upset. I tried to be mad that he was laughing, but it did make me feel better. Like when I first drove my dad's truck and side-wiped a tree - I came home crying and he laughed at me and just popped the dent out with a plunger.    I feel like that nervous teenager all over again.

Oh, I'm so happy he's not upset. See, we all deserve a HUGE learning curve on that one I think. Even the people that have lived there their whole lives do those things! Don't feel bad.

Jewlz, I had my first driving lesson on Monday.    I think I am going to switch instructors though - cos she made a point to tell me that she's a Jehovah's Witness and why 'God gave us rainbows'. 

I found it really hard because I have driven manual transmissions for years in the US, but apparently my manual driving technique with the clutch & brakes etc (which is like second nature to me) is all wrong & will make me fail the test if I don't 'unlearn' it.  So not only am I having to learn how to drive the wrong way round, but faffing about inside the car as well - having a lot of trouble pushing the stick away from me to put it in first gear (and finding the right gear each time) rather than toward me with my right hand, etc etc.  DH says he thinks it's probably more difficult to unlearn an old habit-second nature thing like that, than to learn 'how to' from scratch.

I want to get my UK licence before an upcoming trip to the US however.  So I may end up just going for an automatic licence - just to get one, even though our car is manual.  And then keep working on the manual licence later on. 

Jewlz, I had my first driving lesson on Monday.    I think I am going to switch instructors though - cos she made a point to tell me that she's a Jehovah's Witness and why 'God gave us rainbows'. 

I found it really hard because I have driven manual transmissions for years in the US, but apparently my manual driving technique with the clutch & brakes etc (which is like second nature to me) is all wrong & will make me fail the test if I don't 'unlearn' it.  So not only am I having to learn how to drive the wrong way round, but faffing about inside the car as well - having a lot of trouble pushing the stick away from me to put it in first gear (and finding the right gear each time) rather than toward me with my right hand, etc etc.  DH says he thinks it's probably more difficult to unlearn an old habit-second nature thing like that, than to learn 'how to' from scratch.

I want to get my UK licence before an upcoming trip to the US however.  So I may end up just going for an automatic licence - just to get one, even though our car is manual.  And then keep working on the manual licence later on. 

Yeah, I know what you mean. I always drove manual in the US, and I am sure I do it "wrong" as well, but haven't had a professional driving lesson yet, so no one has bothered to point that out. I seem to do ok with the left hand shifting thing, it's just the narrow roads and being on the other side of things than I am used to that is putting me off. There are loads of blind corners with huge buses around every one, just lurking there until I turn. At least, that is how I feel!
DH said he was proud of me for finding my way back on my own, so at least he is looking at the positive, so I suppose I should too. Maybe I will go after that license this year after all, just to get it over with, then maybe the anxiety wouldn't be so high. Also, he pointed out that there wouldn't have been a parked car on that turn I took, so it must have been a signpost or something that I bumped into. I don't think the impact was very hard because there is only a small scuff on the outside of the mirror, I think it just snapped toward the window of the car so fast that the glass shattered. It makes me feel better to think I just clipped some signpost or something, rather than marking someone's car. I'm not the kind of person who would normally just drive off, but I was so scared then and had no idea where to pull off with the traffic coming, etc. Hopefully I didn't do too much damage, other than what I have done to our car! 

Are you absolutely sure you didn't damage the other car? I hate to rain on the parade here, but it's actually not OK to hit someone's car and just keep going. If I owned that car and came back to find damage and no note from the person who did it, I'd be pretty furious. I'm not saying it's easy to learn how to driving in a new country - I had to do it too - but you really really should have stopped. 

X-posted with you. I hope he's right about there not being a car parked on that corner. Are you absolutely sure, though??

I think I am going to switch instructors though - cos she made a point to tell me that she's a Jehovah's Witness and why 'God gave us rainbows'. 

Sorry for the brief hijack, but why did God give us rainbows? 

p.s. Glad you're ok, Jewlz!  Learning to drive over here sucks, but you'll get there! 

Sorry for the brief hijack, but why did God give us rainbows? 

You know, in the bible - that whole thing about Noah & the flood & all.  Cos everything in the bible is, of course, absolutely and literally true.  And I'm sure that's essential info for my passing my driving test. 

Learning to drive over here sucks...

It really, really does. 

Are you absolutely sure you didn't damage the other car? I hate to rain on the parade here, but it's actually not OK to hit someone's car and just keep going. If I owned that car and came back to find damage and no note from the person who did it, I'd be pretty furious. I'm not saying it's easy to learn how to driving in a new country - I had to do it too - but you really really should have stopped. 

X-posted with you. I hope he's right about there not being a car parked on that corner. Are you absolutely sure, though??

Yeah, well, I already feel bad about that. There wasn't any place where I felt comfortable stopping. Stopping in an inappropriate place could've caused a serious accident, which would've been worse. Thanks for your support, though, really.

I found it really hard because I have driven manual transmissions for years in the US, but apparently my manual driving technique with the clutch & brakes etc (which is like second nature to me) is all wrong & will make me fail the test if I don't 'unlearn' it.  So not only am I having to learn how to drive the wrong way round, but faffing about inside the car as well - having a lot of trouble pushing the stick away from me to put it in first gear (and finding the right gear each time) rather than toward me with my right hand, etc etc.  DH says he thinks it's probably more difficult to unlearn an old habit-second nature thing like that, than to learn 'how to' from scratch.

I could have written that myself!  I've had 3 lessons so far, and before I started I would have thought my main confusion would be roundabouts, but, nope, it seems the damn hand brake is out to get me!  I feel like my hand is on that more than the steering wheel.  Not to mention on my first lesson, pulling out of a parking lot, I immediately headed down the wrong side of the road.  Thank goodness it was a wee road and there weren't other cars.

Jewlz, sorry you had such a tough time today 

I have to start lessons soon. I'm absolutely terrified, and I hate myself for it. I've been driving since I was nine (on our own property) without incident, and I commuted upwards of 50 miles a day for thirty years. But I'm scared.

Idiot.

I don't know why it seems so insurmountable, but it does.

I've waited 5 years because I was scared.  So it's just got to be silly & I need to get on with it.  But geez - that first two hour lesson was such hard work, and the JW woman didn't make it any easier.